Q: Two teens in our community committed suicide recently. One was our daughter's friend and she's still very distraught, even though she had counseling at school. I think she's depressed and needs more counseling. My husband doesn't. He skipped the funeral because he said it "celebrated cowardice." I want our daughter to see a psychologist, but he thinks that talking about it can rationalize suicide. What to do?

A: Get the referral. "Many teenagers need support to understand the grieving process and move on in a healthy way," says adolescent psychologist Stephen Wallace, director of the Center for Adolescent Research and Education (CARE) at Susquehanna University in Selinsgrove, Pa.

When a community loses a young person to suicide, parents should make an explicit effort to talk with their teens about what happened. Yet some worry that they'll plant the idea of suicide simply by raising it in conversation.

"This is false and inhibits vital dialogue and leaves young people at greater risk," says Wallace.

Counseling can help. But don't ask the counselor to do all the work. Continue to observe and talk with your daughter. While no studies show that suicide is contagious, "suicides among youth may be suggestive to those already contemplating self-harm. Most teens are not -- they're simply trying to grapple with something very hard to understand," says Wallace.

What do you say to your daughter? "Reinforce your love and genuine concern for her health, safety and welfare," suggests Wallace. "Reassure her that her feelings about the loss are normal. She also needs to hear that things will get better.

"Young people, short on life experience, often believe that the way they feel when distressed or depressed might be the way they will feel forever. It's critical to explain that all people, at some point in their lives, experience loss and emotional pain, and that there's a light at the end of the tunnel she can't see yet. Assure her that counseling can help."

A good counselor can determine whether your daughter is depressed and if she is, suggest appropriate treatments, advises Wallace.

Ninety percent of people who attempt suicide suffer from psychological ailments, and there are effective treatments for most of them, says Alan Berman, former president of the International Association for Suicide Prevention.

Teen suicides are a serious national problem. "It's the third leading cause of death for 15- to 24-year-olds, and the sixth for 5- to 14-year-olds," says Wallace.

Wallace urges parents and teachers to look for signs such as declining school performance; social problems; substance abuse; neglect of appearance and responsibilities; appearing or talking about feeling sad, hopeless, bored or overwhelmed; outbursts, severe anger or irritability; talking about feeling anxious or worried; losing interest in activities; and hurting oneself, such as cutting or severe dieting. (For more information, go to the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry website, aacap.org.)

Experts believe that most youth suicides are the result of temporary feelings of helplessness -- things we can identify and help with if we are observant and stay in close touch with our kids.

"Suicide isn't contagious, but it is preventable," says Wallace.

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

Q: I often hear moms say that their daughters struggle with math in later grades. I don't have the "math gene," but I never want my preschool daughter to hate math. How can I develop her interest?

A: Stop saying you don't have the math gene. There's no such thing. It's a myth that boys are destined to do better in math. Thanks to efforts that focus on girls, gender gaps in math achievement have rapidly declined over the last few decades.

The achievement gap between girls and boys isn't because of differences in innate math skills, say researchers, but because of how math is taught. Girls are often given less encouragement to develop their abilities, says Jo Boaler, a professor of mathematics education at Stanford University and co-founder of YouCubed (youcubed.org), a nonprofit that provides mathematics education resources to K-12 educators and parents.

To help girls (and boys) develop a foundation for math success, here are some tips:

-- Talk numbers every chance you get: When filling a grocery basket, say, "We need 1, 2, 3 pints of yogurt." Call out page numbers as you read books. Repeat the weather report: "It is 55 degrees now and it will be 70 degrees -- that's 15 degrees warmer -- after school." When driving, note, "On that road, we went 55 mph. Now the speed limit is 35 mph. We're going 20 mph slower."

Number talk helps develop number sense, which math educator Marilyn Burns describes as "knowing what each number represents and what its relationship is to others."

-- Read math-themed kids' books: Children's librarians can point you to many wonderful picture books that use humor, compelling characters and illustrations to motivate kids to think mathematically. Holiday House publishes many delightful math-related books for young readers, including several by former math teacher David A. Adler. Recent books of his include "Triangles" (Holiday House, 2014) and "Millions, Billions and Trillions: Understanding Big Numbers" (Holiday House, 2013).

Burns has authored or co-authored various math-themed children's books, including "How Many Feet? How Many Tails? A Book of Math Riddles" (Scholastic, 1996); "Spaghetti And Meatballs For All!" (Scholastic, 2008); and "The 512 Ants On Sullivan Street" (Scholastic, 1997). For a list of Burns-recommended math-concept books by grade, see the Chart of Children's Literature at www.mathsolutions.com.

-- Highlight everyday math every day: "When you cook, kids can't help but learn fractions," says Laura Overdeck, the advisory board chair for Johns Hopkins' Center for Talented Youth. "When playing with Legos, ask 'How many bumps does that piece have?' to get them multiplying the width and length of a block. When kids run and jump, quantify their feats of speed and strength: How many feet can they kick that ball? How many seconds to run cross the yard?"

-- Enjoy it! To emphasize that math can be funny and whimsical, Overdeck added math puzzles and riddles to her kids' bedtime reading. She compiled them into two books, "Bedtime Math" (Feiwel & Friends, 2013) and "Bedtime Math 2" (Feiwel & Friends, 2014), to get kids into math "one puzzle at a time," she says.

Find more resources and a daily math problem at www.bedtimemath.org.

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

Q: Our middle school STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering and Math) Club wants to celebrate Earth Day by creating "green" guidelines for our school. The students can't agree on what that means. As a parent and STEM mentor, I'd like concrete outcomes. Do you have any suggestions?

A: That's a worthy project for Earth Day, which is April 22. It has the potential to change district environmental practices and increase student engagement. There's research showing that "healthy, sustainable schools actually save money and raise test scores while safeguarding our children's health," notes Deborah Moore, a California environmental scientist who helped start the Green Schools Initiative (greenschools.net).

"Green schools" share four characteristics: They strive to be toxin-free and adhere to green building practices in construction. They "reduce, reuse and recycle," use resources sustainably and make energy-efficient choices. Green schools promote healthy choices for students, such as "green" playgrounds and junk food-free lunches. Green schools also get kids involved in many ways, by integrating environmental education into the curriculum, providing hands-on experiences (such as planting gardens), doing research (such as energy audits), and involving students in the maintenance of the school and the grounds.

Looking at those characteristics, guide the STEM Club members in deciding what to tackle. A first step, suggest folks at the Green Schools Initiative, is forming a Green Team that includes representatives from school stakeholders -- students, teachers, custodians, facilities managers, parents and a school board member. The STEM club can organize and manage the team's work.

Next, craft and adopt a Green Schools vision statement that resonates with students. Prominently display the statement, which should be supported by a resolution from the school board, parent-teacher organization and other influential entities.

Have the STEM Club audit the school's environmental impact to identify top priorities for action -- from assessing school lunch waste, to finding inefficiencies such as leaky fountains or computer equipment that's left on overnight. (There's a useful auditing tool at greenschools.net; click on the "Take the Quiz" link to see how green your school is.)

Using the results, create a one-year action plan that sets such realistic and measurable goals as improving the school's recycling program, planting a garden, eliminating toxic herbicides and pesticides on school grounds or purchasing nontoxic cleaning supplies. Decide how to roll out and measure the plan over the course of a year. Work with teachers to incorporate lessons relating to your goals into the curriculum.

If time is short, encourage the club to celebrate Earth Day with an Arbor Day focus on trees. Students can begin by assessing the health of existing trees on school grounds while planting new ones.

"Trees are the ultimate green machines," says Luke Miller, outdoor living editor for Lowe's Creative Ideas and a green-minded tree buff. "Kids learn that shade trees can help keep buildings cooler in summer and that evergreens can help keep buildings warmer in winter. The lessons trees teach us are often a first step in developing a deeper understanding of our environmental challenges and priorities." (For free resources, go to www.arborday.org.)

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)