DEAR ABBY: My wife walks around our house nude or topless with the shades open, and anybody walking outside can see in. Recently she did this while some painting contractors were working around our house. I have begged her not to, to no avail. What should I do? -- MORE MODEST IN NORTH CAROLINA

DEAR M.M.: It appears you married an exhibitionist. You might point out to her that parading around that way could be considered disrespectful to the workers she's exposed herself to. But don't be surprised if she's unwilling to change because it may give her some kind of thrill. (I'm sure it also gives the viewers something to talk about around the dinner table.)

DEAR ABBY: Please remind beachgoers that they need to leave their fire pits open and not cover them with sand. My 16-month-old grandnephew was walking on a beach in Carmel, California, with his mom and dad when he suffered burns to his feet from walking across sand beneath which were hot coals. It will take at least three weeks for this dear baby's feet to heal from those burns.

People don't realize that covering the coals with sand hides them and keeps them hot for up to 24 hours! Beach fires must be treated differently from those in a forest, where they should be covered with dirt because of the surrounding trees. -- BEACH ETIQUETTE

DEAR B.E.: I'm printing your letter not only as a warning to beachgoers who might be using fire pits, but also to the parents of small children because hot buried coals can be a hidden danger to their little ones. Because the coals cannot be seen, children sometimes confuse fire pits ringed by rocks with "sandboxes," and the results can be tragic.

According to the University of California Irvine's Regional Burn Center, "coals should be extinguished by drenching them with water, waiting five minutes and drenching them again." (Italics are mine.) When water isn't available, the coals should simply be allowed to burn out.

DEAR ABBY: My husband, "Patrick," and I were married last year. On the morning of our wedding, his grandmother, "Sally," died. It was very sudden. Everyone assumed we'd postpone it, but we didn't.

Abby, my husband is still emotionally distraught over her death. Patrick's parents were absent from his life and Grandma Sally had raised him. Did we make a mistake by not postponing our wedding? How can I help him? -- SAD NEW WIFE IN SOUTH CAROLINA

DEAR SAD NEW WIFE: Life is for the living. I don't know how large your wedding was, but if there were contracts involved (hall, flowers, music, caterer, guests coming in from out of town, etc.), you were right to follow through with your plans. I am sure that's what Grandma Sally would have wanted.

Please convey to your husband how sorry I am for his loss. Because he is moving so slowly through the grieving process, it would be helpful for him to contact a grief support group. To find one, he can ask a doctor, clergyman or hospice for a referral.

DEAR ABBY: My son married an educated professional woman from another country. When their twins were born, my daughter-in-law immersed them in her native language so it would become their mother tongue. Although I understand and respect the benefits of being bilingual, this caused a lot of communication gaps and frustration between us and the grandkids during their early years.

They attend a bilingual elementary school now, and their English is superb and communication between us is great. The problem is, when we are together, my daughter-in-law speaks to her children exclusively in her native language. My son understands the conversation, but my husband and I do not know what is being said. We think this is rude and inconsiderate.

Are we being overly sensitive, or is this common practice in families with multiple languages? Our relationship with our daughter-in-law is polite and cordial, but not close or intimate. Any advice? -- LEFT OUT IN FLORIDA

DEAR LEFT OUT: This is not unusual in multilingual families, and I agree that it is inconsiderate. Have you spoken to your son and daughter-in-law about how this makes you feel? If you haven't, you should, because she may not be deliberately trying to make you feel excluded.

When you raise the subject, choose your words and tone carefully. Because if you don't, your relationship with your daughter-in-law could become a lot less cordial than it is.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a 55-year-old gay male who has been with my now-spouse, "Owen," in a loving, committed relationship since 2005. While earlier we could not legally marry, in 2006 we had a commitment ceremony bringing together close friends and family to acknowledge and celebrate our relationship. In 2013, Owen and I were finally able to legally marry in California.

My dilemma comes from people who don't know what to call us. People often refer to my spouse as my "friend" or "partner." At times I say nothing, but more often than not, I find myself saying, "Oh, you mean my husband." Some of them thank me for the clarification; others just look at me with a blank stare.

Owen never corrects them because he feels it isn't his place. I feel it's my responsibility to do so, first so as to not play down the significance of our relationship, but also to educate these people. Do you think this is inappropriate? -- MARRIED IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR MARRIED: Not at all. The people who refer to you and Owen as "partners" and "friends" are using terminology that is evolving because marriage among same-sex couples is still relatively new. As it becomes more commonplace, that will change. In the meantime, it's completely appropriate for you and Owen to speak up.

P.S. For any reader who may not already know, gay men refer to their spouse as their husband and lesbians refer to theirs as their wife.

DEAR ABBY: My neighbor has a registered day care business, and every day I hear her screaming at young children and infants. They are all 4-year-olds and younger. We live in a rural area outside a small town. She uses profanity and says mean things to them. It makes me want to cry when I think of how scared those kids must be.

Who do I contact with this information? I could record her with my phone if evidence was needed to shut down her business. This woman has a really bad anger management problem. She also knows I can hear her because we have spoken about how our voices travel.

I don't think she is being physically abusive, but her words must be damaging to those kids. Please help me find someone to tell. I'm afraid the local police won't be able to do anything. I can't even take my own child in our backyard because she swears so much. -- DAY CARE DRAMA IN INDIANA

DEAR D.C.D.: Ideally, you should try to tell the parents what you have been hearing because they should be aware that their trusted caregiver loses control of her emotions and takes out her frustrations on their children. If the situation is as ugly as you describe, those kids must be terrified of her.

If that's not possible, Child Protective Services should be notified because the environment is not emotionally healthy for little children.

P.S. By the age of 4, children usually have started to repeat the language they hear around them. I'm surprised these parents haven't noticed the change in their vocabulary and questioned their little ones about where they heard those "bad words." Nonetheless, on the chance that the parents are clueless, what you have observed should be reported.

DEAR ABBY: I have a friend, a contractor working for the U.S. government, who thinks he's in love with a Ukrainian girl. The pay is really good. He recently came back from a visit to see this "girlfriend."

He has been sending this girl almost all his money for the last nine months. He was never alone with her, and she showed no emotional or physical attraction to him. In fact, a male friend of hers asked him for $800 to give as a bribe so he wouldn't be drafted into the Ukrainian military. We believe this male friend is, in fact, the girl's real boyfriend.

My friend paid $300 to send flowers to her for their nine-month anniversary, for which she expressed no thanks or appreciation. What advice can you provide us here? -- FRIEND IN AFGHANISTAN

DEAR FRIEND: Your friend's "romance" seems suspicious to me, too. That he is giving all his money to someone who appears to be so emotionally distant is worrisome. I also have to doubt that $800 would keep an able-bodied man from being drafted into the Ukrainian military since the country is now involved in military conflict. It appears your friend is being treated more like an ATM than a suitor, but he may have to arrive at that realization on his own.