DEAR ABBY: I feel like a terrible wife when my husband gets sick -- not majorly sick, but with a run-of-the-mill cold. Men can be terrible babies when they are sick. It is a cold! He's not dying. I happen to have a cold right now, and I am functioning just fine and not moaning and groaning about it.

Also, I am not his mother! When he whines, I shut down or become touchy and crabby. If he doesn't whine, I'm happy to take care of him, but I can't take the time during the day to lie in bed with him (I work from home, so I am accessible to him) to keep him warm. I can't stay up until midnight rubbing his back, and I cannot tolerate the sappy whining.

I made him aware of my disdain for the way sick men behave a number of years ago, but he still acts like the world is ending when he has a cold. How do I tend to him without feeling resentful? -- NOT HIS MOTHER

DEAR NOT HIS MOTHER: Cold season is in full swing now. Your husband didn't catch one on purpose. When people feel fragile they need TLC, and he is no exception.

Here's how to "tend" to him: Keep a supply of chicken soup on hand, and insist he keep drinking it to stay hydrated. (Chicken soup has magical curative powers.) If he has a headache, there are over-the-counter meds he can take, so suggest it when he complains. While you're at the pharmacy, buy a heating pad and an extension cord for him so you can keep working if he has the chills. (You probably caught his cold while you were cuddling.) Sanitize any surface he may have touched.

Even if you aren't feeling sympathetic, try to appear as if you are -- and keep your sense of humor. A final suggestion: Sleep apart until he's no longer contagious, which may give him an incentive to recover faster.

DEAR ABBY: Every year, my adult siblings and mother exchange Christmas gifts. Since my husband died in 2012, my sister has told me she has made a gift in our name to the Muscular Dystrophy Association. She also makes a production of telling this to my children.

Abby, the MDA sends the person in whose name a donation has been made a notification about it, but we have never received a notice of any kind from them. When I contacted them and asked, I was told a donation was never received.

I always give my sister an expensive gift. After finding out what has been going on, I am really upset. Is this acceptable? I have no problem with not exchanging gifts, but this seems to be a way to receive without giving. -- HURT IN GEORGIA

DEAR HURT: Lying is not acceptable, and your sister should be ashamed of herself if that's what has been going on. Tell her that, having received no notification from the MDA acknowledging her donation, you contacted them to ask why and were "shocked" to hear no donation had been made. If she can't produce proof of payment, from now on agree to exchange Christmas cards -- if you're still speaking.

DEAR ABBY: I love my parents and would do anything for them. They have never been good about managing money. They are both retired now and on a fixed income, and they have been asking me or one of my four adult siblings for money to help with their bills each month.

I don't mind giving, but recently my siblings and I have become annoyed because, while they continue to ask for money, at the same time they are also taking short trips, which include hotels and rental cars, and inviting friends out to dinner.

They also have a storage locker full of junk that eats up several hundred dollars a month. We have offered to help them clean out the locker, and possibly make money from some of the items in there, but they never commit. Should my siblings and I continue to help, or should we put our collective feet down? -- ANNOYED IN ALAMEDA, CALIF.

DEAR ANNOYED: Put your collective feet down. You and your siblings are good children, but it's time for an intervention. Before giving your parents more money, you should all sit down with them and help them to create a budget, taking into account their fixed income and what you children can afford as a supplement. Then tell your parents they must live within that budget. Period. Their expenses must be trimmed, and the storage unit would be an excellent place to start.

DEAR ABBY: How do you discourage someone's friendliness without being rude?

An elderly man recently moved in with his family in our neighborhood. He roams the neighborhood and approaches anyone he sees to introduce himself and start a conversation. He doesn't seem to have dementia, as he knows where and who he is, but his behavior is a little odd (such as asking for the precise spelling of everyone's first name).

Unfortunately, now that he has met my husband and me, he comes up and knocks on the door to chat -- weekdays, evenings, weekends. The last time I was outside with my three kids, he approached with a stack of photos and proceeded to show me at least 100 prints of a trip he had taken abroad -- 10 years ago.

I feel trapped because I don't want to be mean to an old man, but I dread seeing him stroll down the road. What is the best way to deal with this situation? -- WANTING TO WITHDRAW

DEAR WANTING: The poor man is probably lonely and looking for human contact. Because you are not prepared to engage in his "neighborly" conversations, the next time he strolls by, tell him that you do not have time to chat right now. If he knocks on your door, tell him that you are busy or that you will be leaving shortly. And suggest to him that he may want to find a senior center so that he can make friends with contemporaries and won't feel so isolated.

DEAR ABBY: One of my girlfriends is dating my ex-boyfriend. They just had a kid, and he started flirting with me. I'm not in a relationship, so I flirted back. Now I'm getting bullied nonstop because people say I'm gonna break them up. But shouldn't they be mad at him more than me?

Why is everyone jumping down my throat? I didn't do anything with him. It was just words. Either way, he's the one in the relationship! He shouldn't have done it in the first place, and yes, I admit it was wrong on my part, too. But not as wrong, right?

I need help, because I go to a small school, and everyone here wants to jump me now. It's hard to concentrate on work with mean comments getting shouted out at me. I've said my "sorry's" to everyone. Even though it's none of their business. -- HE'S WRONG, RIGHT?

DEAR HE'S: It should be apparent that your ex-boyfriend still feels the need to prove to himself that he's attractive to women, which makes him no prize. You were right to apologize to "everyone." (I hope the first apology was to your girlfriend.)

There is an unwritten rule that you're not supposed to date your friends' exes, and frankly, this is the reason for it. I can't stop your classmates' judgment of you, and neither can you. But you can hold your head high and tell them you have learned a lesson.

DEAR ABBY: I am on a self-imposed strict diet to try to curb my weight. Often when my spouse and I are invited to a couple's house, I will ask what they are serving and let them know about my diet. Is this rude? Would it be more rude to say nothing and eat beforehand?

I have fallen into the pitfalls of overeating, and I'm afraid that if I let myself splurge for even one night it could spiral. It has happened before. The last time was at a party where all they had was pizza. When I politely declined, the host joked that "I was too good for their food." Was I wrong? -- STAYING STRONG IN TENNESSEE

DEAR STAYING STRONG: It's not rude to bring the fact that you are watching your weight to your host's attention when you are invited. A considerate host should ask the guest if there are any food allergies, restrictions, etc. If that doesn't happen, it's all right to inform the host if there are foods you need to avoid. If guests prefer to lessen the temptation to pig out by eating before going to a party, that's fine too.

P.S. As to that pizza party -- were you warned in advance what kind of party it was? If not, your host was extremely rude to call attention to the fact that you weren't eating and to ridicule you by "joking" about it. Now that's tacky!

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO MY ASIAN READERS: The Year of the Rooster begins today. I'm wishing a happy, healthy new year to all who celebrate it. People born in the Year of the Rooster are trustworthy, work well on a schedule and are responsible at work. They are also observant, active, resourceful, courageous and talented. Roosters are confident in themselves. They enjoy the spotlight, but can appear vain and boastful when they "crow" about their accomplishments!