DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a 50-year-old man who works in a field where the majority of staff are women. I am in management and find myself referring to staff as "girls" in conversations with peers and leadership above me.
I realize the term is not appropriate, and is in fact demeaning to the hardworking staff in our organization. Once I catch myself, I become flustered and quickly correct myself to the person I’m speaking with, but I can tell from their reaction and body language that they either feel my lengthy correction is awkward or disingenuous.
How should I handle these situations in the future? Should I try to apologize for my mistake in referring to staff as "girls," and if so, what would be the best way to do this? I am working very, very hard to break this horrible habit and do better.
GENTLE READER: Work harder. You learned not to put your hand on a hot stove at a young age and still rose to the level of a manager -- this cannot be so very difficult.
If you agree to do that, Miss Manners will tell you how to repair the damage done, which is to apologize with enough sincerity and frequency that you understand your female co-workers’ feelings of humiliation.