Archives

DEAR MISS MANNERS: We enjoy continuing friendships with couples we have known from various chapters of our lives. Some of these friends now live far away, and we enjoy having them visit and stay with ... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I’m struggling to accept the palates of my in-laws. We frequently share meals with two generations of my husband's family: The older generation only likes their ethnic cuisine and i... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a late-middle-aged gentleman who has been an atheist for about 35 years. I have been open about this fact, but do not advertise it carelessly.... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I’m fortunate to have had a dear friend ever since kindergarten. We were close all through school, and when I moved a few hours away for college and work, I would see her when I cam... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband and I are in our 80s now, but we have been married only 20 years. This is a second marriage for each of us.... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I realize it’s an unpleasant world with unpleasant people who are going to say unpleasant things. But sometimes, you have to get down on their level in order for them to get the mes... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a widow with many acquaintances and activities. I am physically and verbally affectionate with family members and close friends, and am generous with hugs and “I love yous.”... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Lately, I find that whenever I schedule even the most mundane of appointments, I am endlessly nagged by correspondence from the host: “Please confirm Lady Tuna’s rabies booster appo... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was at the dentist last week and the hygienist, whom I had never met before, mentioned she had a new grandchild. I naturally congratulated her and asked the polite questions: sex,... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I work at a small, family-owned business where a few employees have dietary restrictions, some by choice and some by medical necessity.... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I live in a very cliquey condo community, and I feel left out when I don’t get invited to the lunches or dinners out with the other ladies. And then I feel even more left out when s... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: How do you go about declining when someone who just isn’t your type asks you out or asks for your phone number?... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I attended a music festival, where I wore pasties instead of a top. While there, I actually ran into a group of co-workers, who all had a good laugh at seeing me in such a state of ... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a female student, and I have a situation where a male classmate inappropriately chimes in on personal conversations. For example, I was asking my friends about a type of bra, a... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I live in a large city, and used to enjoy going out to lunch or dinner with friends. However, the loud music combined with the lack of sound-absorbing materials in restaurants have ... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a professor at a small university. One of my colleagues has the annoying habit of entering my office without knocking. These are not social visits: She invariably needs help wi... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have just received a delivery notice that two bottles of wine are on the way to me. This is the fourth such delivery, from a financial professional who manages some of my accounts... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: You must be really happy that the Secretary of Transportation has told us poor wretches who fly economy to dress up for the privilege. Hats and gloves, naturally. I have my grandfat... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Over the years, I have noticed that at most live performances -- from professional concerts and operas to dance recitals and school plays -- the audience automatically gives a stand... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a single man who inherited, from my parents and grandparents, both a love of entertaining and also a great deal of the trappings needed -- china, crystal, linen, silver -- that... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Strangers want to make small talk with me while waiting in grocery checkout lines, at bus stops, at the bank, during flights, etc. I do not want to make friends with strangers every... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a freelance journalist who has been living, off and on, in the private room of a hostel off the beaten path. I love the place because it’s gorgeous and usually has excellent vi... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I think the reason that people think using “ma’am” or “sir” is offensive stems from the idea that you have to assume someone’s gender identity in order to use them.... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am getting married in a traditional church ceremony. My father, who will be giving me away, has refused to wear a tuxedo on the grounds that it is a “monkey suit,” even though all... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I got married recently. It is a second marriage for both of us, but our first weddings were two decades ago, and we wanted to have a special event that really felt like a wedding.... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: What degree of formality is proper for a musician at an afternoon concert?... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Elevators have been in existence, I believe, for more than 150 years, but there does not seem to be a system of accepted manners related to them.... more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Nearly three decades ago, my husband committed a serious crime. He faced the consequences, served his sentence, and has since built a quiet, responsible life. He has taken full acco... more