Convicted drug smuggler Mike Gielen, 24, hired a helicopter at Deurne airport near Antwerp, Belgium, on Sept. 25, then hijacked the aircraft in mid-flight and forced the pilot to fly to Berkendaal women's prison south of Brussels to free his wife, Kristel Appelt, 27, who is being held there on suspicion of murdering an ex-boyfriend, The Guardian reported. As inmates cheered and waved below, the pilot circled the prison yard, trying unsuccessfully to land, while Gielen put his head out of the chopper to vomit five times, before giving up and flying off. Authorities arrested Gielen and several accomplices within 24 hours when they discovered he had used his real name to hire the helicopter. "It seems the whole thing has been staged quite amateurishly," remarked Tom van Overbeke, Gielen's attorney. [The Guardian, 9/28/2020]

Wide World of Sports

Hillsborough County (Florida) Sheriff's deputies responding to reports of a domestic violence situation on Sept. 23 arrived at the apartment of Devon Garnett, 26, to find Garnett and two friends, fans of the Tampa Bay Lightning, watching Game 3 of the Stanley Cup finals. Neighbors had become alarmed after hearing shouts of "Shoot! Shoot!" and "I dare you to shoot!" just before 8:30 that evening, reported the Associated Press. The deputies "thought there were guns in the house," said Garnett, who told them, "Nope, we're just screaming for Steven Stamkos." [Associated Press, 9/25/2020]

Recurring Themes

Voters in the village of Deveselu, Romania, reelected popular Mayor Ion Aliman to a third term in a landslide victory on Sept. 27 despite the fact that Aliman had died of COVID-19 10 days before the election. The Associated Press reported that word of the mayor's passing had spread fast among the village's 3,000 residents, but his name still appeared on the ballots, and many villagers used the vote as an opportunity to honor Aliman, who would have celebrated his 57th birthday on election day. After the results were revealed, many villagers went to his grave to pay respects and light candles, saying, "We will make you proud" and "This is your victory." [Associated Press, 9/28/2020]

Compelling Explanation

After throwing a Bible that struck a Marion County (Florida) Sheriff's deputy in the face, Robert Otis Hoskins, 39, of Summerfield, told officers that God had directed him to break into his neighbors' home and free their young daughter, according to authorities. WKMG-TV reports police were responding to reports of a burglary on Sept. 22 when they encountered Hoskins, who emerged from the house next door wearing nothing but briefs and yelling something like, "I condemn you!" before throwing the Bible. Officers tased him and took him into custody; Hoskins' wife told deputies he "does have a drug problem," according to the arrest report, and the alleged victim said about $50 worth of clothing had been stolen. Hoskins was booked on multiple charges. [WKMG-TV, 9/30/2020]

Latest Human Rights

A High Court judge in Liverpool, England, has rejected Cheryl Pile's attempt to sue the Liverpool Police for violating her rights in April 2017 when four female officers changed her out of the clothes she had vomited on, reports the BBC. Calling the officers' actions "an act of decency," the judge noted that Pile, who later paid a fine for being drunk and disorderly, was "too insensible with drink to have much idea of either where she was or what she was doing there," and would otherwise have been left "to marinade overnight in her own bodily fluids." [BBC 9/18/2020]

Bad Behavior

CNN reports a 32-year-old unnamed Irishman was charged with vandalism after being caught on Sept. 21 carving his first and last initials into a pillar on the first floor of the Colosseum in Rome. The structure, which has stood for two millennia, is a World Heritage Site, and Italian law calls for a hefty fine or prison sentence for damaging a historical and artistic landmark. Archaeologist Federica Rinaldi, who is responsible for the Colosseum, suggested it would be better to "take a selfie" than to carve into the amphitheater's walls. [CNN, 9/26/2020]

Annuls of Technology

-- Taro Kono, Japan's new minister for administrative reform, is wasting no time in starting his crusade to cut down on bureaucratic red tape, reports The Japan Times, and among his first targets is the fax machine, which is still in use in more than 95% of businesses in Japan. "I don't think there are many administrative procedures that actually need printing out paper and faxing," Kono said on Sept. 25. A day after being appointed to his new job, Kono created a red-tape hotline on his website, inviting public input, that had to be shut down the next day after receiving more than 4,000 responses. [The Japan Times, 9/27/2020]

-- Keith Bebonis knows a secret about the Chicago Police Department, reported the Chicago Sun-Times on Sept. 25: They still use typewriters. Bebonis knows because he repairs them when the officers "abuse" them. "Police officers, in general, are very heavy typists," said Bebonis, 46, who carries on the business his dad started in the late 1960s, Bebon Office Machines and Supplies. He contracts every year to repair 40 to 50 IBM Wheelwriters -- early word-processing machines that can store a few pages' worth of data. "I don't want it to seem like I'm saying they're taking their frustrations out on the typewriter," Bebonis said. "But they're just not very sensitive with these machines." [Chicago Sun-Times, 9/25/2020]

It's Good to Have a Hobby

Calling himself "Britain's dullest man," Kevin Beresford, 68, of Redditch, is the founder of the Roundabout Appreciation Society and has traveled all over the country for the past 17 years, searching for the best traffic circles, which he memorializes in calendars with photos of his favorites. His hobby began when he ran a printing company that created calendars for clients every year, he told BirminghamLive, and they jokingly created a roundabout calendar. Since then, this self-described "Lord of the Rings" has expanded his interests to include phone boxes of Wales and Birmingham's No. 11 Outer Circle bus route. His latest focus has been on car parks. "I started the Car Park Appreciation Society 10 years ago, but nobody has joined," he said. "It's a bit sad." [Mirror, 9/18/2020]

Police Report

Johnathan Lee Rossmoine, 36, of Louisiana, was charged with multiple sex crimes on Sept. 27 after deputies of the Hernando County (Florida) Sheriff's Office arrested him at the Spring Hill home of a teenager in whose bedroom Rossmaine had been living for a month, according to authorities. The Associated Press reports the two met online two years ago, deputies said, and Rossmoine told them he had traveled to Florida several times since then. The teen told officers Rossmoine had been living in the bedroom since Aug. 19, and hid in the closet when the teen's parents were home. [Associated Press via KATC, 9/30/2020]

Animal Capers

Five African gray parrots adopted in August by Lincolnshire Wildlife Park in the United Kingdom were on display to the public only 20 minutes before the park started getting complaints that the birds were using obscenities with guests, reported LincolnshireLive. When the birds first came to Lincolnshire, they were quarantined together, where it seems they taught each other some "fowl" language. "The more they swear, the more you usually laugh, which then triggers them to swear again," explained park CEO Steve Nichols. The birds have been placed in an offshore enclosure where Nichols hoped other birds would teach them some manners; when released, they'll go to separate areas so they can't encourage each other. [LincolnshireLive, 9/28/2020]

-- Ukraine International Airlines has banned a traveler from all future flights with the carrier after the unidentified woman opened an emergency door on a Boeing 737 and went for a walk on the wing as it was waiting at a gate at Boryspil International Airport in Kyiv. CNN reported the passenger had traveled from Antalya, Turkey, with her husband and children in the Aug. 31 incident, when other passengers heard her say she was "too hot" before she popped open the emergency exit and went outside. The airline criticized her for setting an inadequate "parental example" and threatened she may face "an exceptionally high financial penalty." Airport security and doctors on the scene determined she was "not under the influence of alcohol and/or drugs." [CNN, 9/4/2020]

-- A 51-year-old man from St. Cloud, Minnesota, was released from the Sherburne County Jail in Elk River on Sept. 12, but as he left the facility, he decided to take with him a DoorDash delivery that had been intended for a correctional officer working there. The Star News reported the officer contacted the former inmate by phone to inquire after his $29.13 order, and the man said he thought his family had sent it to him. He was cited for theft. [Star News, 9/17/2020]

Oops!

-- Officials in Dania Beach, Florida, recently upgraded signs welcoming visitors to their city, including a small one that has greeted drivers for years along Dania Beach Boulevard, but local activist Clive Taylor took exception, pointing out that the sign is actually in Hollywood, not Dania Beach. "The little sign was bad enough," Taylor, who is vice president of the Hollywood Historical Society, told the Sun Sentinel. "But to have Dania put up this mini-billboard with lights on it is wrong." Hollywood Mayor Josh Levy says he's confident the two towns can work together to resolve the issue. [Sun Sentinel, 9/17/2020]

-- An octogenarian in the village of Parcoul-Chenaud, France, set off a violent explosion in his attempt to kill an annoying fly, the BBC reported in early September. Not realizing a gas canister in his home was leaking, the man used an electric fly swatter to battle the insect and caused an explosion that destroyed his kitchen and damaged the roof of his home. While the man was mostly unharmed, he has had to move to a local campsite while his family makes repairs to the home. [BBC, 9/6/2020]

Chutzpah

Three unnamed Metro-North Railroad employees were suspended without pay on Sept. 24 for turning a storage room under New York City's Grand Central Terminal into a man cave, complete with a television, refrigerator, microwave and futon couch, according to the Metropolitan Transportation Authority. The Associated Press reported that investigators found the space after receiving an anonymous tip in February 2019 that the three -- a wireman, a carpenter foreman and an electrical foreman -- had built a secret room where they would "hang out and get drunk and party." [Associated Press, 9/24/2020]

Nature

Caesar, a 16-year-old alpaca at the Alaska Zoo in Anchorage, was killed on Sept. 20 by a wild brown bear that tunneled under a fence while the facility was closed then left. Caesar, who had lived at the zoo for 15 years, was "a crowd favorite," executive director Patrick Lampi told the Associated Press. The bear had been hanging around the zoo, knocking over trash cans and breaking locks, and was later euthanized when it returned. Caesar's companion alpaca, Fuzzy Charlie, escaped the attack and was unharmed. Lampi said a similar incident took place about 20 years ago; that bear was captured and relocated to Duluth, Minnesota. [Associated Press, 9/23/2020]

Collections

September 22 marked the 60th anniversary of the day 14-year-old Boy Scout Steve Jenne scored a special memento of then-Vice President Richard Nixon's campaign visit to Jenne's hometown of Sullivan, Illinois. Nixon took a bite of a buffalo barbecue sandwich that day, then set it down. "I looked around and thought, 'If no one else was going to take it, I am going to take it," Jenne told the Herald & Review, and the leftover has been in a glass jar in Jenne's freezer ever since. In 1988, word of the sandwich earned Jenne a spot on "The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson" and led his acquiring half-eaten items from Carson and fellow guest Steve Martin, as well as Tiny Tim and Henny Youngman. [Herald & Review, 9/23/2020]

Smooth Reaction

A 78-year-old Spanaway, Washington, woman was alerted by her barking dog on Sept. 20, and opened her door to find "a man," she told KIRO, standing in front of her. As "he turned and started to leave," the woman, identified as Sandy, said, "Oh, no, you don't," and picked up her shotgun and cocked it. The alleged intruder plopped down on her porch steps and the two waited for police to arrive. "You know, I've got grandchildren your age!" Sandy told him. Pierce County Sheriff's deputies took the man into custody, but Sandy didn't press charges. [KIRO, 9/22/2020]

Government in Action

The Opa-Locka (Florida) City Commission voted 4-1 on Sept. 9 to repeal a 13-year-old ordinance that made wearing saggy pants a crime, the Miami Herald reported. Around town, visitors can see signs reading, "No ifs, ands or butts ... It's the city law!" and showing two young men with low-riding waistbands, but Vice Mayor Chris Davis explained: "I felt it disproportionately affected a certain segment of our population, which is young African American men." The ACLU of Florida agreed. [Miami Herald, 9/13/2020]

Frontiers of Farming

Cockroach farms are not new in China, where the bugs have long been used in Chinese medicine, but a new facility near the eastern city of Jinan is gaining attention as a way to deal with food waste while producing organic protein supplements for animal feeds. In four industrial-sized hangars, Australia's ABC News reported, rows of shelves are filled with food waste collected from restaurants through an elaborate system of pipes. A moat filled with roach-eating fish surrounds each building to keep the roaches from escaping. "In total there are 1 billion cockroaches," farm manager Yin Diansong said. "Every day they can eat 50 tonnes of kitchen waste." Said project director Li Yanrong, "If we can farm cockroaches on a large scale, we can provide protein that benefits the entire ecological cycle." [ABC News, 9/19/2020]

Armed and Clumsy

A Pineville (Louisiana) police officer who reported he'd been "ambushed" on Sept. 20 has been accused of shooting himself instead, according to authorities. The Pineville Police Department said John Goulart Jr. originally claimed that he'd been shot once in the leg, and that a second shot had hit the rear door of his police car while he was at a shopping center. But Police Chief Don Weatherford told KALB: "(E)vidence gives you some pretty clear direction and it led us to reinterviewing Officer Goulart Jr. and he admitted at that point that he had not been truthful with us during the investigation." Goulart was charged with filing a false police report and malfeasance; he's also been placed on administrative leave. [KALB, 9/23/2020]

Florida real estate agent Kristen Kearney was inundated with interest in a condo she listed in Lake Worth after photos of the $100,000 property and its Budweiser beer can decor went viral. The former owner, now deceased, made it "his life's mission to wallpaper his home in beer cans, and he did it," Kearney said. "He even created a crown molding look with the cans." United Press International reported every wall and ceiling in the condo is covered with actual beer cans, except the bathroom. Kearney said the property is under contract with a backup offer. [United Press International, 9/15/2020]

Come Again?

A man identifying himself as Jesus Christ appeared before Rickergate court in Carlisle, England, on Sept. 15 after being arrested by British Transport Police on suspicion that he did not buy a ticket to ride a train from Edinburgh to Carlisle. When asked to state a plea, the man replied, "There is a not guilty plea; I don't need to plead," the News & Star reported. In response to a request for his address, he said: "No fixed abode, or Yellow House, Albion, Mauritius." The bearded defendant wore a hood and a green blindfold throughout his hearing; he was returned to custody as prosecutors considered his case. [News & Star, 9/15/2020]

The Passing Parade

Windermere, Florida, fifth-grader Ian Golba, 11, visited the principal's office on Sept. 15 after his teacher asked him to remove his Hooters face mask. "She said it was not appropriate for school and I asked her why and she said if you really want to know why go ask the principal," Ian told WESH. The principal at Sunset Park Elementary School backed up the teacher, asking Ian three times to remove the mask, which he did. But Greg Golba, Ian's dad, wants to know what the problem was. "I don't think it's offensive at all. It's just a restaurant," Greg said. [WESH, 9/16/2020]

Compelling Explanation

Tarrant County, Texas, Sheriff's Deputy Jay Allen Rotter, 36, called 911 on Aug. 26 to report that his girlfriend, Leslie Lynn Hartman, 46, had shot herself in the head with his duty weapon as they shared a hug in their bedroom, telling the dispatcher "she is done" and he "would have stopped her if he could have," according to Denton police. But as police investigators analyzed physical evidence and Rotter's electronics over the following weeks, they came to identify Rotter as a suspect, leading to his arrest on Sept. 14, reported NBC5. According to the arrest affidavit, the deputy had been active in a chat room called Discord that night, where he posted that he had "just sent a 9 millie in this ... hippie," and phone and computer records showed the two had been arguing about the shooting of a milk carton in the backyard before the alleged murder. Rotter was charged with murder and tampering with evidence and is being held on $1.15 million bond in the Denton City Jail. [NBC5, 9/16/2020]

Inexplicable

Jimmy Senda of Racine, Wisconsin, takes a walk along the beach on Lake Michigan every morning, where he collects "sea glass and random stuff -- because I like to do artwork at home with the stuff that I find," he told FOX6. On Sept. 15, he came across a curious package, "wrapped in aluminum foil, and around it, it had a pink rubber band," he said. "Curiosity got to me, so I popped it open and it looked like a chicken breast," but on closer inspection, he determined, "it was a brain." The package also contained flowers and paper with what appear to be Mandarin characters printed on it. Senda called police, who turned the package over to the Racine County Medical Examiner's Office and later announced the brain was "not consistent with a human brain," although they were still trying to determine what kind of animal it came from. [FOX6, 9/16/2020]

Government in Action

Ocean Township, New Jersey, listed the home of 89-year-old Glen Kristi Goldenthal for sale on Sept. 9, foreclosing on the property because Goldenthal owed 6 cents on back taxes from 2019. The tax shortfall had accrued to more than $300, triggering the sale, which alerted Goldenthal's daughter, Lisa Suhay, in Virginia. NBC New York reported the outraged Suhay began calling everyone in the township's office to explain that her mother suffers from Alzheimer's and probably forgot about the bill. Suhay took care of the debt, but for her mother, "(T)his isn't over ... She's called me dozens of times in the last 24 hours," asking about her house and where she's going to live. Mayor Christopher Siciliano was apologetic, but Suhay remained incensed: "Shame on anybody who can't think far outside the box enough to come up with six cents in an office full of people." [NBC New York, 9/13/2020]

Bright Idea

A commuter boarded a bus between Swinton and Manchester, England, on Sept. 14 sporting what one fellow passenger thought was a "funky mask" until it started to move. The face mask turned out to be a live snake, wrapped around the man's neck and over his nose and mouth, the BBC reported. Another passenger took photos and posted them on Twitter, commenting "each to their own and all that." "No one batted an eyelid," another rider said. Transport for Greater Manchester, however, said in a statement that "snakeskin -- especially when still attached to the snake" is not suitable for masks. [BBC, 9/16/2020]

Fashion of the Times

In response to the ongoing coronavirus pandemic, French fashion house Louis Vuitton announced it will release a protective visor Oct. 30 in its stores worldwide that Vogue reports is "the most luxurious take on a plastic face shield that we've seen to date." The LV Shield is trimmed with the designer's signature monogram and gold studs engraved with the company's logo. It doubles as a sun visor, changing from clear to tinted when exposed to sunlight, and also can be flipped up and worn as more of a cap. Although a price for the shield has not been set, Vogue estimates it to be somewhere between the cost of a typical Vuitton hat, $700, and sunglasses, $800. [Vogue, 9/10/2020]

Duuuude

Colin Sullivan, who grows cannabis plants outside his home in New Brunswick, Canada, caught a little thief in his garden on Sept. 8, the Daily Mail reported. Sullivan took four photos of a mouse nibbling on the stems of the plants -- then found the little rodent passed out in a pile of leaves. "He's missing an ear so it may be self-medication for his PTSD but I still think it's time for an intervention," Sullivan posted on Facebook. Sullivan re-homed the mouse to a cage, where he was weaned to just one medium leaf per day. "It's been a couple of rough days for our little baked buddy here and despite a belly ache and a wicked bad case of the munchies I think he'll make a full recovery," Sullivan wrote. [Daily Mail, 9/10/2020]

Police Report

-- Daytona Beach, Florida, police arrived at the home of Lovely Butts, 64, on the evening of Sept. 14, where they found a female juvenile relative standing in the front yard, smelling of bleach. The girl, who was described in the police report as Butts' "primary caregiver," told police she had argued with Butts about "the location of her medicine" and that Butts had thrown bleach at her, striking her in the face and mouth. Butts also allegedly threatened to pistol whip the girl. The Smoking Gun reported that Butts was charged with aggravated assault and child abuse; police confiscated her unloaded pistol from her nightstand. [The Smoking Gun, 9/16/2020]

-- Mark King of Wolcottville, Indiana, went to war with imaginary enemies on Sept. 13 after using methamphetamine on the previous two days, according to the LaGrange County Sheriff's Department. Deputies responding to reports of a man swinging a broom handle around and hollering in a yard, found King as he left a neighbor's garage after having thrown a gun through the building's window. Previously, police determined, King had allegedly shot up the inside of his own home, imagining that people were trying to break in and steal some of his belongings. WANE reported King was transported to a hospital and later charged with possession of meth and paraphernalia. [WANE, 9/14/2020]