DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My husband is good at making some repairs around the house, but there are some jobs he just wants to get done as quickly as possible, not necessarily the best way possible. Over the course of the past couple of years, some of his “repairs” ended up costing us much more than they should have because we have to call in a professional to undo what he’s done wrong.

For instance, he decided to redo the powder room. It was part of an addition to our house one of the previous owners put on, and when they did it, as we found out, they did not do the work to code. So, when my husband started stripping out the original fixtures, he hit some weird plumbing issues that were beyond his knowing how to fix. Three weeks and a very expensive plumber bill later, the situation was fixed. And now, he is talking about trying to redo the kitchen with just the two of us.

Like I say, he often knows what he is doing, but how do I convince him to lay off the jobs beyond his abilities and patience levels, like I am sure a kitchen remodel would be? --- WIFE OF A WOULD-BE-FIX-IT-UP MAN

DEAR WIFE OF A WOULD-BE-FIX-IT-UP MAN: There’s something to be said for your husband’s initial motives, but I agree with you that knowing his own limits would very likely end up saving you time, money, and aggravation in the long run.

It could help make your case if you check around with friends or relatives who have recently done a kitchen remodel using professionals. This will at least give you a potential pool of contractors to contact if you decide to get some quotes or, in the worst case, professionals waiting in the wings, should they be needed.

Another thing you might work with your husband on is exploring piecemeal renovations that the two of you can readily tackle. Restaining or repainting your existing cabinets, replacing countertops, or just repainting the room are relatively straightforward rehab projects that can refresh and upgrade the look of your kitchen economically, and, if done right, without putting it out of commission for the duration of the job.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: Not wanting to freeload, I suggested that my mom charge me rent. She seemed surprised, and said she’d get back to me on that. Later, she appeared in a rather formal outfit, and said she was now my landlady. She spelled out my rental rate and terms; it was higher than I had planned on, but she conveyed such an air of authority that I didn’t argue.

Later, when she was back to her normal self, I told her the rate was too high. She stepped out and returned as the “landlady,” and asked what the problem was. I explained that the rate was more than I could afford; she told me I could either pay it or find somewhere else to live.

I decided to forget about rent and hoped my mom would also. However, I have now received notices of late rent and eviction.

Not caring to interact with her alter-ego, I haven’t tried to talk with my mom about this. She is normally loving and supportive, but I’m afraid she will transform into the “landlady” and kick me out, or possibly sue me for the rent and late fees I already owe.

Should I pass my mom a note explaining that I love her, but I don't like her alter-ego, and I can’t afford the rate she is trying to charge me? I would have trouble finding another place to live, and I regret ever mentioning rent. Anything else I should include? --- THE “LANDLADY’S” KID

DEAR THE “LANDLADY’S” KID: I’m speculating that this alter ego approach is your mom’s way of letting you know you can have her be your mom, or you can have her be your landlady, but she isn’t inclined to be both. She may also be trying to teach you a lesson about the necessity of sticking to the terms of an agreement, even when you find yourself in over your head. A third potential scenario is she’s giving you a not-so-subtle nudge toward getting a place of your own.

I think you originally did the right thing in offering to pay some kind of rent. Where you might have gone wrong was not negotiating hard enough for a financial arrangement you could easily manage — another life lesson, courtesy your mother.

Perhaps it’s now your turn to play a little hardball back, and renegotiate the terms of your tenancy in her house. You could try slipping “Mom” a note pleading your case, but you may have more success putting together a formal, well-thought-out counterproposal addressed to the “Landlady.”

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: When we were dating, I used to think it was kind of cool that I had a girlfriend who was as into sports, especially football and basketball, as I am. Fast forward to two years into our marriage, and I now find it really annoying sometimes when my wife gets so nuts about her teams and their games, that if her favorite is playing mine, she won’t talk to me for at least two days if her guys lose to mine.

I don’t want to stop watching sports with my wife, but how do I get her to understand it’s only a game? --- MARRIED TO AN UBERFAN

DEAR MARRIED TO AN UBERFAN: Since your relationship was in part founded on a shared enjoyment of sports, it’s not surprising your wife has continued to embrace her passion. However, it may be time you openly share your feelings that her over-the-top reactions are taking the pleasure out of watching games with her, especially since it sounds like she’s holding you personally responsible for her teams’ defeats. She may not realize she’s doing that, and if she can take even a small step back to see how her behavior bothers you, maybe she can work on curbing her enthusiasm.

Hopefully, in addition to watching sports, you and your wife have other hobbies you can do together or separately. If not, it might be a good thing to develop some. Few marriages can thrive on only one common interest — especially one that naturally inspires competition.