DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My then boyfriend and I eloped in early November, mostly to avoid a big expensive fuss. But both sets of parents now want to have a celebration anyway.

My husband and I agreed to a simple dinner or family get-together, but every time we talk to one of the moms, it sounds like it’s getting to be a full-blown wedding reception sometime in the spring.

What can we say to convince them this is NOT what we want? --- LIKE IT LOWKEY

DEAR LIKE IT LOWKEY: Getting married is one of the biggest events in most people’s lives, and it’s understandable that those who care about you and your new husband will want to find some way to celebrate your making it official.

Since you’re set on keeping it simple, it may help to give concrete counterproposals to the full-blown affair. Perhaps you can all compromise on a simple backyard party, or as you already mentioned, a nice meal at a local restaurant that can accommodate a dinner party consisting of a few close relatives and friends. Don’t be vague about locations, date, guest list, preferred menu, etc. That way you’ll be making it clear you intend to have a real say in the festivities.

Another tactic is to let your families know you’d rather have a cash gift that will help you in the future, instead of a big party now. No guarantee it’ll work, but it’s worth planting the seed asap.

‘Tis the day before Christmas and in many a house, there’re yet plenty of pre-holiday fires to douse.

Last minute shopping is nearly done, and children are awaiting tomorrow’s big fun.

There are those who must work, and those on vacation; some feel dread, others high expectation.

All over the world joy and hope are stealing, but plenty are struggling, in true need of healing.

Lest we forget the greatest gift of these days, please stop, and remember those in need in countless ways.

A few bucks in a red bucket, a kind word, or a prayer, might just remind someone there are those who still care.

And to all my good readers and to those you love most, I raise a cup of low-fat eggnog and offer a toast.

Be healthy, be happy, be of good cheer, for Christmas Day is nearly here!

Merry Christmas!

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My dad and mom are very old school. When my three sisters and I were teenagers, our family dentist recommended we all get braces, because of how crowded our mouths were. My three sisters all got them, no questions asked. But my parents told me it was more important for girls to look good, and that they were not going to pay for braces for a boy.

I am now in my early 30s, and a large part of my job requires public speaking. I am and have always been self-conscious about my teeth, which are just as crowded now as they were when I was 15.

It may seem petty, but to this day I resent that my parents wouldn’t pay for braces for me, and now I’m shelling out thousands of dollars to take care of it on my own.

Do you think this was a right way for me to be treated? --- JUST NOW GETTING A BETTER SMILE

DEAR JUST NOW GETTING A BETTER SMILE: Parents often have to make choices that seem unfair both when they happen and in retrospect. For your family, it might have been a case of what your mom and dad could afford to do at the time. They decided to give your sisters priority in this instance, but you may have been given other advantages that they weren’t, and for which they also now harbor resentment. Overall, I believe it’s human nature for us to be more inclined to perceive slights than recognize preferential treatment.

At this point, I think you should give your parents a break, even if their earlier decision is costing you money now. Your current circumstances may be entirely different than those they were living with back when they were supporting a family of six.