DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: When I was small, I remember my grandmother complaining about how much time my grandfather spent on the golf greens, rather than doing things around the house.

For the last two of the three years we’ve been married, my husband has spent more weekends playing golf than he has being home, doing things around the house and yard, and spending time with me. I don’t ever nag him, but I do get frustrated and lonely sometimes. I am fine with spending time with my friends and doing my own things, but one of the reasons I got married was to have more time with my husband. And there are things that need doing around the house and yard that just aren’t happening, sometimes until they get into a worse state because of the delay in getting around to them.

How do I make it clear to him I would like to see more of him on the weekends without sounding like a jealous or nagging wife? --- MODERN DAY GOLF WIDOW

DEAR MODERN DAY GOLF WIDOW: I believe you need to have a very clear and calm conversation with your absentee husband. I can understand why you’re getting upset, but if you haven’t told him how you feel, he may very well think all’s well and you’re fine with the way he spends his weekends. It might help if you have some specifics to share with him, such as chores that are being neglected and activities you’re counting on him doing with you as a couple.

Hopefully, it’ll be a wake-up call that some aspects of the marriage are working much better for him then they are for you.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: Sometimes I think my wife lets our kids getaway with everything. When we moved into our new house at the end of last year, she said we should let the kids pick their own rooms. Of course, the twin girls both wanted the biggest second bedroom, but so did their younger sister. My wife came up with what I think is the dumb idea of doing a six-month rotation for each girl in the bigger bedroom. We’re coming up on the first switch, and the twin who’s already in the room is refusing to move her stuff into the next smaller bedroom where our other twin now sleeps.

I think each kid should draw straws or something and whatever the outcome of the draw is how the rooms get permanently assigned. Doesn’t that make more sense than rotating rooms? --- LET’S JUST DRAW STRAWS

DEAR LET’S JUST DRAW STRAWS: I guess your wife was trying to keep everyone happy, but I agree her solution is likely to lead to more problems than it solves.

This could, however, prove to be a self-limiting situation. After each of your daughters goes through all the work of relocating their stuff, they may come to the conclusion it just isn’t worth it for a few more square feet every 18 months.

You might want to try letting the scenario play out for a cycle. If it turns out your girls are fine with the arrangement, then problem solved. If, however, Mom and Dad are doing all the work in the transfers and/or if there’s continued grousing about fairness and having to regularly switch rooms, then I say go for either good old-fashioned birth preference order or the the luck of a draw to determine who gets which bedroom permanently.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My oldest daughter and I were pretty tight buddies before her mom and I split five years ago. That was when she was 10, and now she is in 10th grade, and really starting to make a life of her own, which is a good thing.

One issue is that her mom is a first-class hoverer, and always grilling our daughter on every aspect of her life and telling her all the things she thinks she is doing wrong. It gets her so angry and they fight much of the time.

That is not the relationship I want to have with my daughter. I remember how hard it was to be in high school, and I want to be there for her. I am also her dad, and want to protect her from the kind of jerks most high school boys are at one time or another. I know because I was one once both a high school boy and a jerk. I outgrew both, and think I can offer her some good perspectives on how to survive these tough, but also fun days.

How do I let my daughter know I am in her corner, and want to keep the lines of communication open? --- TEEN’S DAD

DEAR TEEN’S DAD: It think you’re off to a good start with simply having a fairly clear understanding of your daughter’s situation at this point of her life.

If you believe her mom’s hard push isn’t working, then my recommendation is to go with a lighter touch. But there’s no need to get into “good cop – bad cop” competition with your ex. I think what could work well is if you continue to spend one-on-one time with your daughter, doing things you’ve always enjoyed doing together, with age-appropriate modifications, of course. When you’re with her, keeping it casual and open might make it easier for her to talk to you than it is for her to talk to her mom right now.

Let her know what you shared in your letter — that you want to be there for her because not only are you her dad, but you remember how difficult it can be to be 15 and on the verge of the adventures — and mis-adventures — that are part of growing up and becoming an adult.