DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I grew up with my first cousin almost like she is my sister. Her house was two blocks away from mine. We were born two weeks apart, went to the same schools growing up, were in marching band together in high school, went to the same college, met our future husbands and got married within months of each other.

So you could say we have this kind of competition thing, because when I say we did all these things at almost the same time, sometimes she was first, sometimes it was me, but the other one of us was always right behind the other on purpose.

I found out I was pregnant in early April and three weeks later, guess what? She told me she too is pregnant. She said they had been planning this, but I say she can’t stand for me to beat her at anything.

Up until she heard I was pregnant, she told everyone she wanted to wait five years after getting married to start a family. Now she says I got pregnant at three and a half years in just to beat her, and I think she got pregnant now to not let me be the only one with a baby.

Can you believe anyone would get pregnant just to compete? --- CAN’T LET HERSELF LOSE

DEAR CAN’T LET HERSELF LOSE: This sounds like a mutual rivalry, which I can’t help thinking is something you both feel a need to perpetuate.

It’s not uncommon for life events to happen in clusters within families and groups of friends. People often reach certain milestones at similar times as their peers. Nothing new there.

What seems to be the case with you and your cousin is that neither of you is willing to be the odd one out, and that isn’t generally the best motive for taking on major life events.

Rather than looking sideways at your cousin, it might be a good idea to step back and review your own choices and why you’ve made the ones you have.

Deciding to do something for its own sake, rather than as part of a game of one-upmanship is a healthier life strategy in my opinion.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: Unlike his parents, my husband and I waited until after we were married for a few years to have children. So when our son was born in April I was 10 years older than my mother-in-law was when she had her first baby.

All throughout my pregnancy, my mother-in-law was full of advice for me on what’s best for me and the baby, and from the minute our son arrived, she has been telling me what I should do for her grandson and exactly how it should be done.

She is practically obsessed with some things being done like they were 35 years ago when my husband was born. She has her way of swaddling, bathing, feeding, dressing, and everything else you can do for a baby. And at least half of it is different from how I am doing it, based on what I’ve learned and continue to learn as I go along. She says I rely too much on what I find online, and should check everything I’m doing with our pediatrician before I do some harm to my own baby.

I appreciate her wanting to help, but her help is causing me more stress than if I didn’t have her “help” the two days a week she’s over at our house.

I know that my mother-in-law means well, and honestly we can use some help, but I would prefer it to not include constantly being told how wrong I am in everything I’m doing.

Is that unreasonable? --- MIL DOESN’T ALWAYS KNOW BEST

DEAR MIL DOESN’T ALWAYS KNOW BEST: Every generation brings something new to the parenthood game.

You’re aware of how much help your mother-in-law can be to you in your son’s early days, and as a grandmother myself, I understand how much it means to her to be part of this special time in your family’s life.

I don’t believe you’re being unreasonable in wanting to follow what you feel is best for your baby based on current recommended practices.

Perhaps it’d be helpful if you shared some of the information you’re basing your routines on, especially if the source material you’re using gives good, solid, proven reasons why your preferred methods work.

Making your mother-in-law a more up-to-speed partner in the care of your infant son might hopefully make things easier for everyone.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I have started talking to a super sweet guy. We have a lot in common, which I find very promising.

The one thing we don’t share is a love of dogs. I have three of them, and to me they are my kids. But he refuses to stay at my place because of them and if I stay at his I have to have someone dog-sit for me, which can be expensive if one of my friends can’t do it.

I have never been with a guy this nice and being with him is beyond awesome, but I don’t know where we’ll go from here if it means I have to give up my fur babies to be with him.

How do I sell this guy on how great my dogs are? --- LOVE MY DOGS

DEAR LOVE MY DOGS: I’m not sure you can convert a non-dog person into a dog lover overnight, or at all.

If your new interest is unwilling to give your dogs a chance, then it seems likely to me that, as you foresee, should your relationship progress into something longer term, you may eventually find yourself having to choose between your furry friends and the man in your life.

It might be worth trying to gradually introduce him to at least one of your beloved dogs, particularly if the pet is gentle, well-behaved, and tolerant of new people.

Let them get acquainted somewhere such as a park or a trail or a dog-friendly eatery with outdoor seating, where there’s plenty of room to give both man and dog a comfortable distance while they observe and evaluate each other.

By bringing them together on neutral territory, you’ll potentially gain a better idea of whether or not there’s a chance you won’t have to make a tough decision down the road.