DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: After three miscarriages I have just entered my second trimester with my current pregnancy. You can hardly tell I am pregnant since I am barely showing yet, especially if I dress right.
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I am the last of my siblings to have a baby, even though I’m also the oldest, and it’s the same way for my husband’s side of the family. Each time we told family and close friends we were pregnant, they all got crazy excited, and then crazy disappointed when we lost the babies.
I want to tell at least our parents, but my husband and I also feel that we need to be further along in case things go wrong again.
Do you think it’s wrong to keep this pregnancy to ourselves when we know it’ll be welcome news to our families and friends? --- HAVE A SECRET
DEAR HAVE A SECRET: No, I don’t think it’s at all wrong for you to wait until you feel you’re ready to share the news of your pregnancy. While your loved ones have experienced disappointments, you and your husband have lived through your losses firsthand.
When you feel the time is right and you begin telling people about this pregnancy, don’t be shy about explaining why you wanted to wait. I imagine most people will understand.