DEAR ABBY: I'm in love with two men at the same time, but one of them happens to be dead. Twelve years ago, I met a wonderful man, "Carl." We had each other at "Hello" and became engaged two weeks later. We were very happily married until I lost him to cancer six years later.
Two years after I lost Carl, I decided to dip my toe back in the dating pool. A few months later, I met "Philip." We also were immediately attracted to each other and are very happy together. We've been a couple for four years and will be married this summer. He's very understanding about my feelings and memories of Carl. Am I wrong to marry this man I love dearly when I still have feelings for my late husband? -- WONDERING WIDOW IN MISSOURI
DEAR WONDERING WIDOW: When a spouse dies, the love the couple had for each other doesn't also die. The love you feel for Carl can last as long as you do, and you shouldn't feel guilty about it. I have said many times that grief is an individual process. That you have fallen in love with Philip doesn't lessen your love for your late husband. Celebrate your good fortune. I wish you and Philip a lifetime of happiness together.