DEAR ABBY: My best friend since the 9th grade and I have always watched NFL football on Sundays. We have watched through the births of my children (he is the godfather to both; they are now adults), deaths in the family -- everything. He has never married or had a significant other. He is very family-oriented, though. He has two sisters and two brothers.

Two years ago, his siblings moved to other states. It was a very sad time for him. The bond I thought would never be broken now has been. I completely understand his visiting them during Thanksgiving, Christmas and any special event, but my view is, besides those visits, he could see them at any time during the entire six-month offseason from football.

When I said this, he told me things have changed, and although he has been back both summers, he tells me it's cooler and more pleasant to visit them in autumn. Of course, I am the one who drives him to the airport every time. I truly miss my best friend on those Sundays. I'm hurt and would like your advice on what I can do. -- LONELY SPORTS FAN OUT WEST

DEAR SPORTS FAN: I understand your sadness and hurt feelings, but it's time to start accepting reality. Your friend has explained that his family circumstances have changed, and you must accept it. The changes in his circumstances have nothing to do with you and everything to do with his desire to stay connected to his siblings.

It's time to become proactive. Your next step should be to find another sports fan who can watch (or attend) these sporting events with you, which will help to fill the void that now exists on football Sundays.

DEAR ABBY: My friends of 20-plus years bought their "dream home," and they're now 90 miles away. They have not cleaned the place even once since they moved in. Ten years ago, I lived with the wife and her parents for six months. I quickly realized that she and her family never cleaned their home.

I understand she had an injury from an accident several years ago, but I have chronic pain from arthritis and still find a way to clean my apartment. Her husband was enabled by his mother for the first 35 years of his life, so he never learned to do anything except pay bills and save money.

The moment you walk into their home, you are hit with a smell. And forget using the bathroom -- the toilets have brown rings, and their shower is so cruddy I wait to return home to shower. I can hardly eat there because of the smell and the dirty tables and kitchen. Would it be awkward to send them a gift card for house cleaning? Also, how do I decline an overnighter? -- METICULOUS HOUSEGUEST

DEAR HOUSEGUEST: Why this couple hasn't thought of hiring a cleaning service is anybody's guess -- unless the husband is so intent on saving money that he's too cheap to spend it. By all means, send them the certificate, and after you do, postpone any return visits until you know it has been used.

DEAR ABBY: My wife and I have been teachers since 1999. We married in 2011. She became vegan in 2017. It helped her beat diabetes, which I love. However, she's pure vegan for animal rights and listens to vegan podcasts all day long after teaching and on the weekends. I mean all day, every day with earbuds in. I have to say, "Knock, Knock" to even talk with her.

Right now, she's listening to podcasts and messaging vegan people on social media and doesn't even realize I'm typing. I love my wife, but I can't escape the frustration of not being able to have a conversation with her about anything.

We have no kids together, but I raised her son from 7 years old. He moved to live with his dad because of her obsessions with work and veganism. I love her, but the fridge is filled with kale. Should I stay, or should I go? -- AFTERTHOUGHT IN OREGON

DEAR AFTERTHOUGHT: Tap your wife on the shoulder and ask her to remove her earbuds. When she does, give her an earful. Tell her you love her but you need a partner who is willing to be more of a companion than she has become. Tell her you shouldn't have to ask permission to talk to her because of her preoccupation (obsession) with her podcasts.

If you want food in the house that isn't vegan, go out and buy some. And if she's unwilling or unable to accept and adapt, try marriage counseling before calling a lawyer. The marriage you have described is not a happy one, or you wouldn't have written to me.

DEAR ABBY: I'm growing concerned for my grandparents. They are in their late 80s and homebound. Recently, a new tenant moved into their garage apartment. They LOVE her. The rest of the family is suspicious of her. She has no job and no car and has never paid rent. She frequently spends the day with my grandparents and recently "helped" them change all their usernames and passwords to something more "simple and easy."

My grandparents live on Social Security. They have no savings, and I don't believe they have a will. From my perspective, they are setting themselves up to be robbed, abused and left high and dry by a crook disguised as their friendly tenant.

Is this worthy of an Adult Protective Services investigation? My grandparents guilt the rest of the family by saying, "At least our tenant comes over often, unlike the rest of you." (I live three hours away). Do I need to mind my own business? They aren't suspicious at all. -- DUBIOUS IN TEXAS

DEAR DUBIOUS: An investigation is not an accusation. The relationship your lonely grandparents have with this tenant is unusual. Contact APS, inform them about what's going on with your grandparents and let someone there decide whether your concerns are worth following up on. Better to be safe than sorry.

DEAR ABBY: I have been married for 28 years. Last year I was diagnosed with cancer. It was discovered because of a seizure I had at work. They put me in an ambulance, took me to the hospital and did a CT scan, which revealed my stage-4 cancer. Prior to this, my wife didn't work, while I had a well-paying job. This instantly reversed for obvious reasons.

My wife was extremely attentive. She started taking me to all my appointments and spent a lot of time with me in the hospital on her days off. This was about a six-month ordeal, and long story short, when I saw my doctors last week, they announced that after 35 radiation treatments and seven chemo treatments, they can no longer find any visual evidence of the cancer. I was so thrilled I cried.

Since then, my wife has been drinking heavily and getting angry with me just about every night. I don't know what's going on with her or what to do. She's the best woman I've ever met, and I don't want to lose her, but she's starting to become violent. Could you give me some advice? -- RECOVERING BUT CONFUSED

DEAR RECOVERING: Your wife may be reacting to the trauma she suffered when you became ill, which meant she had to become the primary caregiver. This, however, does not excuse her excessive drinking and violent episodes. Of one thing I am certain: You MUST NOT allow the status quo to continue, regardless of how much you love her. She should be evaluated by her doctor to see if something is medically wrong with her. And the two of you need to get into counseling right away, and because she can't handle her drinking, she may need to start rehab or join a self-help group.

DEAR ABBY: My 22-year-old stepdaughter has been receiving very large Venmo payments into her bank account. I know this because my husband, her father, is also on the account and I have access to it. We have asked her several times where the money is coming from. The first time, she lied and said it was from dog walking. (She has a history of lying.)

She has recently started claiming that her old "boyfriend" from four years ago -- whom she broke up with because she found tons of photos of half-naked women on his phone -- was sending her money. Abby, this isn't $20 or even $100. It's thousands of dollars EVERY month. Her ex was a delivery driver. No way can he make that much after-tax money. Where do you think she's getting the money? I say sex, but my husband refuses to believe it. What should I do? -- SUSPICIOUS IN TEXAS

DEAR SUSPICIOUS: I, too, suspect that your stepdaughter may be involved in something sex-related. She could be an escort, have found herself a sugar daddy, or be participating in a sex webcam show. She could also be involved in selling illegal drugs.

Because your husband refuses to believe his daughter would do anything illicit, for the sake of your marriage, take a step back. Wait to see what transpires. His daughter is an adult and is responsible for making her own decisions. Because she has trouble telling the truth, there is nothing you can do to help.