DEAR MISS MANNERS: As an environmentally conscious person, as well as fitness-oriented, I usually carry a stainless steel bottle of water wherever I go.

When visiting other people, is it acceptable to carry my bottle in with me to stay hydrated, or should I leave it in my car in favor of the host’s beverage selection?

GENTLE READER: The latter. Presumably the least any host can provide you is water -- in the original environmentally conscious receptacle: a glass -- so bringing your own is not only disrespectful, but also redundant. Unless you mean to suggest that what you carry around with you is more potent than water, in which case Miss Manners fears that your host’s offense may turn instead to deep concern.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: When my boyfriend and I sit out on his patio with his 34-year-old son, the son spits incessantly. He doesn’t do this inside, only when we are outside on the patio.

Sometimes he is smoking when he does this, but he will do it whenever he is outdoors. He talks a lot and tends to dominate conversations. When he’s talking outdoors, he spits just about every time he takes a breath.

I’m trying to be more tolerant, but I am a little disgusted with this habit. I’ve also noticed it with other men throughout my life.

Do you know why some men spit like this? I hope I learn to ignore it, but if it ever gets to be too much for me, do you have any suggestions for addressing this habit? I’m afraid that someday, he’ll catch me in a bad mood and I’ll end up snapping at him.

GENTLE READER: What about screaming? Not at him, perhaps, but at the sight of a glob of saliva being propelled from his mouth? That should not be difficult.

Miss Manners does not understand why anyone would feel entitled to spit in front of others. Evidently it is not a medical issue, as it occurs only outdoors, so she hardly sees the point in ascertaining why -- the answer will likely prove just as awful and even more graphic.

With the current added dangers of being in proximity to another person’s emissions, however, one hopes the practice will become more rare -- and that his wearing a mask will help to protect you. As added incentive, your own mask might also stifle those screams.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I need your advice on how to approach my elderly neighbor. She sent her son over into our backyard to trim down two of our bushes. She did not ask permission to do this, and the bushes were clearly on our property, because her son had to go around her fence to get to them.

This bothers me because I had a stranger in my backyard, and now there is a huge mess. What is the most polite way to tell her this was unacceptable, and that in the future, she needs to ask my partner or me to trim our own bushes? I would have happily obliged, had she just asked!

GENTLE READER: “Your son may not have realized, but he was cutting the bushes on our property. We cleaned up the mess, but in the future, please talk to us before compromising our hedges without consent.”

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: With masks now required for entering restaurants that are opening at reduced capacity, how do we handle conversations and eating? I can’t imagine going back to my favorite restaurant and relaxing while masked. The experience is ruined, even at an outside table, and I would be more relaxed at home.

And I am really puzzled about tipping for curbside, as opposed to tipping for inside (or outside) dining. Are there new rules? What are they, or what should they be?

GENTLE READER: You are not the only one who finds such a prospect unappealing, a reality that restaurants are struggling to address. Staying in is the only alternative to following the rules.

Miss Manners is not a fan of tipping: She prefers that employers pay staff a living wage. But recognizing that it exists, she feels it would be gracious to apply the more generous rules for in-person dining to curbside pickup, as a measure of thanks for those working under trying conditions.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My lovely wife and I have celebrated 48 years of marriage. We had a fairly small wedding, though we invited about 200 guests. Half of them were to come from my fiancee’s hometown, with the other half mostly couples my parents knew. Only about eight guests were friends of mine.

Neither my wife nor I were, or are now, in the same social circle as most of these people. Only about 22 people from my parents’ list showed up. From the others: no show, no gifts, no regrets and no RSVPs. From my fiancee’s hometown, just about everyone RSVP’d and brought or sent gifts. It was embarrassing, with one side of the church full and the other about 15%.

Over the years, we have received invitations to children’s and grandchildren’s baptisms, bar mitzvahs, confirmations and weddings, although we are still not in the same social circles as these people. Many years ago, I started giving inexpensive “invitation trays” as gifts for these events. My wife thinks I should get a more expensive gift from their registries.

My argument is: Why, exactly, should I purchase an expensive gift for people I don’t know, when no one in their family acknowledged my existence when I was married? The only time I ever hear from them is when they want a gift.

GENTLE READER: Contrary to popular belief, cost and graciousness are not, to borrow your phrase, in the same social circle.

So if you are going to contextualize the question as you did, Miss Manners instead asks, “Why should you purchase a gift at all, expensive or otherwise?” You need only decline these invitations.

But while their behavior around your wedding was rude, you may also not wish to reveal that you have been carrying a grudge for 48 years. Whether their current behavior is as gift-grubbing as you believe, or a genuine attempt to reconnect a tenuous relationship, will be hard to assess if you never attend.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: When I receive a call on my cellphone, most of the time it is from someone in my electronic phone book, so the name of the caller appears on my screen as the phone is ringing.

What is the proper thing to do when answering such a call? Just say “hello” as if I don’t know who is calling? Or say, “Hello, Mary” (or whatever the person’s name is? This was not a problem before rampant caller ID.

GENTLE READER: Because the caller cannot see what you see, a “hello,” delivered with that cadence that indicates it is a question, will never get you into trouble.

But now that caller ID is so common, Miss Manners gives you her permission to greet a known caller by name. So long, that is, as you do not plan to follow the greeting with an urgent, “I told you not to call me this late!”

DEAR MISS MANNERS: A while back, a friend asked me for a recommendation for a handyman, which I obliged. Apparently, she and the handyman spoke about a number of things to be fixed, but he only fixed a few.

I came to find out that the handyman saw other items that needed to be fixed, and did so without asking. My friend became quite upset and refused to pay for these additional items, one being a sink that he claims was in terrible condition. Apparently they went back and forth, and the handyman asked only to be paid for the materials used and not labor.

At this point, I became aware of the situation. I commented to her that although he overstepped a bit, he was being helpful and should be fully paid -- especially since she was, and still is, enjoying the fruits of his labor. She said she would think about it.

We never spoke of this again, but I then hired this man again for a small job and found out that she had refused to pay him. Needless to say, I was uncomfortable with him, and now her. Should I leave this alone or say something to my friend?

GENTLE READER: Before you say anything to your friend, let us review business etiquette.

The customer determines what she will buy. Miss Manners believes this statement to be absolute, whatever medical service providers may think. By altering something he was not asked to touch, the handyman committed an ethical breach. That cancels out any genuine concern he may have felt about the sink -- concern that was already suspect, since he expected financial gain for fixing it.

There is no requirement that your friend pay the handyman for his unsolicited time or expense. But there is also no prohibition against her doing so if a long list of conditions is met: that, in retrospect, your friend is happy that the sink was done; that the work was done well; and that she believes the handyman’s intentions were pure -- or at least as pure as the water that used to come out of the sink.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)