Q: What can we do about our teen's use of marijuana? When we confronted him, he said that it's now socially acceptable and on the verge of being legalized. He's refused to stop, and we're not sure how to respond.

Jim: Sadly, your son is correct in some respects. The social stigma against marijuana is diminishing rapidly, and some states -- including my home state of Colorado -- have legalized it for even non-medicinal purposes.

Nevertheless, marijuana remains off-limits to anyone under 21 in every state, and is still illegal at the federal level. Legalities aside, the fact remains that cannabis is a mind-altering and addictive drug. Your son needs to know that his physical and mental health is being compromised. If you've noticed recent changes in his personality, you can strengthen your case by describing these behavioral shifts in specific terms. You can also direct him the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (www.samhsa.gov), where he can see images of "the brain on pot" and access facts about the effects of marijuana on the central nervous system.

Once you've covered the science, don't hesitate to draw a line in the sand. Let your son know that, as long as he's living with you, the weed has to go. The permissive attitudes of society have nothing to do with the standards governing your home. Set firm and consistent boundaries, and enforce them by imposing swift and powerful consequences -- for example, the loss of cellphone or driving privileges.

If he refuses to cooperate, our counseling team recommends that you seek professional help together, as a family. The most successful treatment programs take a family systems approach that involves intensive evaluation and a series of counseling sessions offered in an environment of community and accountability.

Q: How can couples achieve intimacy with a newborn in the house? How can we keep the spark going?

Dr. Greg Smalley, executive director of Marriage and Family Formation: After the birth of a baby, interest in sex can be very different for each person. Some want to resume intimacy as soon as possible. Others experience a decrease in desire. There can be many reasons for this: postpartum depression, fatigue, preoccupation with the baby, fear of discomfort during intercourse (due to temporary physiological changes following the birth), tension or anxiety about new responsibilities, and hormonal changes.

Before you and your spouse resume your sexual relationship, talk with your doctor. Ask specific questions about how long you should wait before intercourse and what you might expect physically.

Medical considerations aside, the key to a couple's sexual relationship after childbirth is not how active their sex life is. Instead, it is tied to their understanding of one another's needs. Ask each other questions like, "What would make our intimate relationship a '10' to you?" "What do you need from me sexually right now?"

It's important to really listen to how your mate responds to these questions. Don't diminish his or her responses. Remember, this is what your mate needs from you sexually right now. There is no right or wrong answer. If you receive an answer that is below your expectations, honor your spouse, even though you may not agree.

And don't forget, a wife will respond sexually after she feels emotionally connected to her husband. Make sure you're focusing on meeting each other's emotional and relational needs. Talking about your day, praying together, setting relationship goals and having regular date nights will help build your emotional relationship.

A positive sexual relationship stems from a positive relationship first. Once your spouse feels like you're honoring his or her needs, then he or she can better respond to yours, too.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

Q: Should I be concerned if my child has an "imaginary friend"?

Jim: According to Dr. Bill Maier, imaginary friends are a completely normal part of life for preschoolers. Parents shouldn't be concerned about them unless a child is so focused on the relationship with the "friend" that he or she seems to be losing touch with reality. And, of course, you should never allow your child to blame their imaginary friend for their own misbehavior. In time, the imaginary friend should disappear.

Danny Huerta, a staff counselor at Focus, gives an illustration: "If kids have been made fun of, a lot of times they'll create a superhero that has powers that will help them feel protected -- maybe a stuffed animal that can be ferocious, like the comic strip 'Calvin and Hobbes.' Hobbes is an example of an imaginary friend 'coming to life' and the fun a child can have with that."

Research shows that an only or first child may be more likely to invent an imaginary friend, and language skills may develop sooner for children who talk with an imaginary friend. Although children should not be discouraged to invent imaginary friends, make sure your child is playing with other children and not existing completely in a pretend world.

Interacting with your child about their imaginary friend can lead to some great teachable moments and opportunities to address specific situations that may have prompted them to invent their pretend companion. Dr. Maier says: "You don't have to go so far as setting a place at the table for your child's imaginary acquaintance, but playing along can be fun for both of you."

Q: My son is heading to college next month. I'm worried about the challenges he'll face -- challenges to his faith and his moral values, not to mention the practical challenges of living on his own for the first time. How can I "let go"?

Dr. Greg Smalley, Vice President of Family Ministries: Your love for your son is touching and inspiring. At the same time, it's important for you to remember that leaving the nest, going off to college, establishing independence, and learning to deal with the demands of daily life are all normal rites of passage for a young adult. It's OK to mourn this change of season. A certain degree of sadness and bittersweet emotion are normal. But don't look at the situation as if you're "losing" your son. You're simply letting go of the joys and responsibilities of parenting him under your roof.

Your son has reached a place in his personal development where he must assume increasing responsibility for his own actions. It's up to him to decide how he's going to respond to the challenges he'll face at college. This is the moment for which you've been preparing him ever since you brought him home from the hospital. At some point, he has to pass beyond your control and discover what it means to be accountable to himself and to God.

The most important message you can send your son as he goes off to college is, "I believe in you. You have what it takes to be successful!" A boy needs to hear this from his parents. Then, show him through your behaviors that you believe in him. Don't jump in too quickly to give advice. Allow him to fail. Don't call to remind him to study, and so on.

Your relationship with your son will never again be the way it was when he was younger. But this process of letting go -- of "giving him wings" -- can actually result in a deeper, more enriching relationship going forward.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

Q: Am I obligated to take care of my parents even though they hurt me in many ways when I was growing up? Our family was really dysfunctional. Now my parents are old, feeble and increasingly unable to look after themselves, and I'm not sure how I feel about caring for them given our past.

Jim: Your question hits home with me because I, too, grew up in a dysfunctional home. Sadly, situations like yours and mine are not unique. Many adults carry the scars of a painful childhood. We may look back, even at the recent past, and remember only abuse and neglect from the people closest to us.

As hard as it may seem, we believe it's important for you to reach out to your parents during this difficult time, and to forgive them. Even when they're not seeking that forgiveness, we can choose to give respect and care to our elders. True honor is placing the highest value on our loved ones whether they deserve it or not.

You can't change the painful events of your childhood or alter your parents' choices. But you can refuse to give their problems power over you. You can make up your mind to find the good in your parents, no matter how meager or unrefined, and to honor them in spite of their flaws. Caring for your parents doesn't necessarily mean agreeing with everything they say, or giving in to their every demand. It simply means doing what you can within a realistic framework to live at peace with your aging parents. It means making wise choices that will keep your conscience clear. When they're gone, you don't want to look back on this time and regret not reaching out to them.

Q: What can I do when my spouse avoids conflict and seems to want "peace at any price"? Unresolved issues are boiling beneath the surface, and we're growing apart. How can I turn things around before it's too late?

Dr. Greg Smalley, Vice President of Family Ministries: If handled correctly, conflict can be a pathway to deeper intimacy in your marriage. Disagreements about money, career, child rearing, sex and in-laws can typically be traced to one underlying issue: fear. At some point, all of us are gripped by the fear of inadequacy, rejection, powerlessness and so on. The cure for these fears can be found in intimacy, validation, love, and connection -- qualities that are essential to any marriage.

With that in mind, we suggest that you ask your spouse to try an experiment with you. It will take just 20 minutes once or twice a week. During the first 10 minutes, one of you will talk about issues that are bothering you. The other will agree to listen without argument or debate. The only response allowed is to ask for clarification. During the second 10 minutes, the other spouse will talk. Again, a request for clarification is the only response permitted.

At the end of the 20 minutes, take a time-out from each other. Reflect on what your spouse has said. Does it help you understand some of the reasons for his or her feelings? Chances are, this experiment will help you both better understand the underlying issues that are causing strain in your marriage.

If your spouse remains intent on avoiding conflict, seek assistance from a qualified counselor who can help you gain perspective on what's happening. Contact Focus on the Family for a free consultation and referral. Also, you may want to seek out a copy of my book "Fight Your Way to a Better Marriage" (Howard, 2012), which is custom-made for your situation.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.