Q: I'd say my wife and I have a good marriage. I'd like to move it to great, but I'm not very adept at the "warm fuzzy" stuff. What's your advice?

Jim: I get this question all the time from men. I think it's basically a matter of perspective, so I encourage them to approach their relationships with their wives like they would a teammate.

Many of us guys have been involved with sports at some point, or we've seen well-functioning organizations. A lot of the same principles apply to both settings. When you create a culture of respect and hard work among teammates, you can be successful at just about anything. I've heard a two-time Super Bowl champion say it this way: "When teammates give their best as individuals, they make each other better."

The best teams aren't necessarily those with the most gifted players. Winning often comes down to teammates who are willing to work hard to learn their roles and execute their assignments, while motivating one another toward excellence. Play as much for the guy next to you as you do for yourself. That's key to success -- in sports, in business and especially in marriage.

Your wife is your teammate through life. Be willing to work as hard (even harder) at your relationship with her as you do at your job or the hobbies you enjoy. Know your role on the team and handle your business. I'm sure she has a few things that she needs to work on, too, but don't make that your primary focus. She'll be motivated to improve her part in your marriage when you step up and improve yours. And when everybody does their part, the team succeeds.

For more ideas to help your marriage thrive, visit FocusOnTheFamily.com.

Q: This will sound terrible, but I hate Valentine's Day. All the hype about love and romance just emphasizes what a disappointment my own marriage has become. Is there any hope for us?

Dr. Greg Smalley, Vice President, Marriage & Family Formation: I hurt for you, and I understand how painful Valentine's Day can be for those in struggling marriages.

There are many reasons why love may fade in marriage. Serious problems like abuse, extramarital affairs, addiction and mental illness can certainly squelch feelings of romance. If you have encountered any of these painful experiences, I'd encourage you to seek counseling. Our staff counselors would be happy to help point you in the right direction; call 855-771-HELP (4357).

Meanwhile, husbands and wives can "fall out of love" for other reasons, too. Stresses involving kids, work and finances can cause a couple to drift apart over the years -- until one day they realize the only thing they share is a tube of toothpaste. If this is where you find yourselves, please don't give up. There are many things you can do to get your marriage back on track ... but sitting back and waiting for flowers isn't one of them.

One remedy I strongly recommend is couples relearning how to have fun together. Research shows that that 92% of couples who make regular date nights a priority report increased satisfaction in their relationships. It doesn't have to be extravagant, although there's certainly a place for the occasional splurge. The point is to establish a habit of consistent connection -- going for a walk or coffee and just rekindling the friendship that drew you together. It makes a huge difference.

That's why my wife, Erin, and I wrote a book together titled "Take the Date Night Challenge." You can order a copy, and find a number of related resources, at FocusOnTheFamily.com. I wish you all the best.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

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Q: From what I've heard about your organization, I suppose helping people with their marriages is a good thing. But why don't you put all that effort toward something really important like combatting poverty?

Jim: I appreciate the question. Since this column is such a limited venue, I'll summarize our perspective with an illustration. The late novelist Pat Conroy described a broken marriage well when he said, "Every divorce is the death of a small civilization." I think that's absolutely right.

Divorce doesn't just split up a husband and wife or separate kids from their parents. The breakdown of the family is one of the most overlooked contributors to the poverty rate in America.

I saw that firsthand as a child. My own father abandoned our family when I was just five years old, and we quickly slipped into poverty. My mother was forced to work full-time to make ends meet. I seldom saw her; she was usually not home afternoons and evenings, and I was off to school in the mornings before she woke up. That was our routine, and it's the routine for thousands of other families as well.

Consider some of these factors:

-- Families that were not poor before the divorce see their income drop as much as 50% afterward.

-- Almost half of the parents with children who go through a divorce drop below the poverty line.

-- In general, children of divorced parents have lower test scores in reading, spelling and math.

-- These kids also are more likely to repeat a grade, have higher dropout rates and lower rates of college graduation. Low education rates perpetuate the cycle of poverty.

So, while it doesn't get reported in the media very often, if we want to decrease poverty, we need to save marriages. Stable families form the bedrock of any society. That's part of why we do what we do at Focus on the Family.

Q: My child seems more depressed during this time of year. What can I do to help him overcome these feelings and be happy again?

Dr. Danny Huerta, Vice President, Parenting & Youth: It's common for preteens and teens to encounter fluctuations in their feelings and mood as the seasons change. This time can be known as the "winter blues." In fact, my teen daughter and I have both recently observed how our moods shift when it gets darker earlier in the day during winter.

If you're noticing mood changes in your child, you might also see them struggling a bit more with irritability, having difficulty concentrating or just not wanting to get up in the morning. In extreme situations, these symptoms might reveal a more diagnosable condition known as seasonal affective disorder (SAD).

To help your child combat their feelings, consider developing a menu of options to cope with their emotions. Your "Winter Blues Menu" can include things you enjoy doing together or individually. Encourage your child to pick one thing from the menu to do each day. Here's a sample Winter Blues Menu:

Working out

Painting or other arts and crafts

Cooking or baking

Playing board games

Going on a walk together

Playing sports

Picking a movie to watch together

You give your family the best chance to beat the winter blues by maintaining a consistent sleep schedule, eating healthy, exercising and spending quality time together. Commit to creating a rhythm for maintaining your family's health this winter season.

If you think your child needs more help coping with the winter blues, call our counseling line at 855-771-HELP (4357). To learn more about creating a mentally healthy home for your family, go to FocusOnParenting.com.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

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Q: My 14-year-old daughter has hit the "boy crazy" stage. As a dad, I'm really dreading the whole dating thing as she gets a little older. How can I prepare both of us?

Jim: It's the age-old struggle for fathers with daughters -- I'll admit on this issue I'm a bit relieved I only had sons! My best suggestion is to teach your daughter the proper role of dating by frequently taking her out yourself.

Regardless of a daughter's age, going on a date with Dad has many benefits. For example, as a girl develops her identity, she often measures herself against impossible standards of "beauty" portrayed by Hollywood and/or social media influencers. You can have an immeasurably positive influence on her perception of herself just by spending time with her and affirming her.

Dating your daughter also allows you to model how a man should treat her. You show her she's valuable by making one-on-one time a priority, especially when you let her suggest activities she would like to do together. Your unconditional acceptance for who she is will build her self-esteem. You can also help her develop a sense of individuality by carefully listening to her and respecting her opinions (even if you don't fully agree). Most importantly, regularly dating your daughter keeps her heart open to you.

So, block out time in your schedule for frequent dates with your priceless daughter. It doesn't have to take all day, but make sure the time is special by limiting interruptions. The best way to ensure success in your daughter's future dating experience is to make sure it starts with Dad.

Q: My wife and I have two preschoolers in the house. It seems like we seldom connect anymore; she always talks about how tired she is after being with the kids all day. How can I reinforce our relationship?

Dr. Greg Smalley, Vice President, Marriage & Family Formation: Remember this when you arrive home after your long, tiring day: your wife has had an equally long, tiring day. She needs two things: (a) adult conversation, including overt expressions of appreciation, and (b) an adult pair of hands to pitch in, take charge of the kids, handle dirty clothes or other debris, and do other things to lighten her load.

Beyond that, here are some "pro tips":

Don't expect to be cared for like another child in the house. Pick up your own toys and clothes.

Don't expect much sexual response when your wife is exhausted, especially if you haven't set the mood. As the saying goes, sex begins in the kitchen -- with meaningful conversation, acts of kindness and compliments, in addition to active work in helping reduce her to-do list.

Join in (or even take over) the process of getting the kids ready for bed. It helps you stay connected with them and also does wonders for your wife's frame of mind.

Maintain regular date nights -- whatever your imagination and budget can manage, whether it's a meal, a concert or just a walk. Focus on conversation and companionship. Make a point of keeping your wife current on your day's activities, and definitely find out about hers.

Take her away for a romantic weekend, or even dinner and an overnight stay, someplace where her daily responsibilities are suspended. With planning and creativity, this doesn't have to be expensive.

Call or text her during the day to simply say "I love you" and offer encouragement.

Flowers and gifts -- for "no particular reason" -- speak volumes.

The bottom line is that all relationships require constant investment from both parties involved. For more tips and resources to help your marriage thrive, visit FocusOnTheFamily.com/marriage.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

INTERNATIONAL COPYRIGHT SECURED. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.