A psychiatrist in his 60s is itching for the sale of his family’s architect-designed contemporary house. But his wife, already retired, is resisting his wish to downsize to an apartment.

As this true tale illustrates, it can be tough for empty nesters to finalize their future housing plans.

“Many older couples just fly by the seat of their pants on the selling decision,” says Eric Tyson, co-author of “Personal Finance After 50 for Dummies.”

Housing analysts say the argument for letting go of a property at this point in the economic cycle is bolstered by statistics.

On average, sellers are now obtaining a 29.7 percent return on investment compared with their original purchase price, says Daren Blomquist, a senior vice president at Attom Data Solutions, (attomdata.com), which tracks housing markets throughout the country.

But Blomquist says the data show that many longtime homeowners, including empty nesters, are resistant to selling.

Cary Carbonaro, a certified financial planner in the field for more than 20 years, says it’s not up to those in her profession to go beyond their role as advisers to clients struggling to reach the right housing choices.

“Where they live is really a personal decision,” says Carbonaro, author of “The Money Queen’s Guide: For Women Who Want to Build Wealth and Banish Fear.”

Here are a few pointers for homeowners torn about selling:

-- Factor lifestyle plans into your decision-making.

As Carbonaro notes, some parents of grown children relish the idea of downscaling to a smaller place that imposes fewer upkeep demands.

But other empty nesters wish to hang on to the large family property where they’ve raised kids because they want to take advantage of the extra space in new ways.

“They turn their kids’ rooms into fun rooms for themselves -- media rooms, hobby rooms or exercise rooms,” she says.

Still, Tyson cautions empty nesters against clinging to the big house with the uncertain hope it will become the hub for many extended family gatherings.

“It’s so hard to project ahead about where your grown children will be living or how much time they’ll have to spend with you once they get busy with their own lives,” he says.

-- Seek outside advice to gain perspective.

By going through a professional group, such as the National Association of Personal Financial Planners (napfa.org), you can locate a planner you can hire for just a few hours to discuss your empty-nest housing issues.

In addition, Tyson recommends that you consider seeking out advice through a certified public accountant who has also been trained as a “Personal Financial Specialist” (PFS). The American Institute of Certified Public Accountants awards this designation. You can locate a PFS in your area by visiting the organization’s website, aicpa.org.

-- Include financial factors in your decision-making.

Obviously, many people reach the kids-are-gone stage with years left in their careers and a strong desire to continue working. But that doesn’t mean they can afford to be oblivious to their future needs for retirement income.

“A fair number of boomers have under-saved for retirement,” Tyson says.

If you’re in this category -- and your home has appreciated substantially -- selling could open the way for investments that are potentially more lucrative.

“I’m talking about freeing up money from your current house by moving to a property that has a smaller mortgage and is less expensive to maintain,” he says.

If your offspring are still in college or grad school, you may have pledged that you’ll cover the full cost of their tuition payments. Still, there could be alternatives open to you.

Maybe you’ll want to meet with financial aid officers at your students’ schools to discuss alternative ways to help offset their tuition costs. For example, maybe they’d be eligible for scholarships, fellowships or work-study programs you didn’t know about previously.

-- Don’t delay charting your housing plans.

Some people appreciate the expanded freedom that comes with an empty-nest life. But others are depressed after the last child leaves.

“A lot of times people are in denial. They run away from making hard choices, such as whether to sell the big house and move,” Tyson says.

He says those in a funk about their new status as empty nesters can squander several years failing to explore and consider alternatives to staying put in their current home.

“It’s a huge mistake to rush into a decision about selling your home. But postponing your plans is also a really bad idea,” Tyson says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)

The last half-decade has been a buoyant period for home sellers at all price points on the housing ladder -- including the highest rungs. An improving economy and inventory shortages have combined to create a strong sellers’ market for luxury properties.

But sellers of high-end homes now face a double whammy. The new federal tax law is limiting the deductibility of mortgage interest, along with property taxes. Meanwhile, mortgage rates have started to climb, gradually eroding the buying power of purchasers.

“Luxury home sellers are going to be in a tougher position. There will be a weakening of demand for homes over $750,000,” says Daren Blomquist, a senior vice president at Attom Data Solutions, which tracks real estate markets throughout the country.

Blomquist says those selling quality properties valued at stratospheric levels of, say, $2 million and higher, have relatively little reason to fret. That’s because many wealthy purchasers use cash rather than mortgages to buy property. But he urges caution for sellers with luxury properties around the million-dollar mark.

“Don’t make too many pre-sale upgrades. Limit yourself to cosmetic changes such as new paint, flooring and landscaping. Otherwise, you might not get your investment back,” he says.

Here are a few additional tips for sellers:

-- Request a checklist of recommended changes from your listing agent.

“Before you sell, the key is to distinguish between changes that give you a big bang for your buck and those that simply represent money burned,” says Eric Tyson, a personal finance expert and co-author of “House Selling for Dummies.”

To come up with a focused plan for pre-sale improvements, Tyson urges sellers to ask their agent for a written checklist.

“A good agent will know which improvements are needed and justified and which are excessive,” he says.

Also, Tyson suggests that budget-conscious sellers consider selecting an agent trained in the art of staging.

“(It) saves you a bundle over hiring a professional staging service,” Tyson says.

-- Let go of plans for a pre-sale addition to your property.

Have you long planned to replace your diminutive family room with a more spacious “great room” that adjoins your kitchen? Are you contemplating doing so now just prior to selling your property? Would that make sense?

“The answer is normally ‘no’. In most cases, it’s not cost-effective to knock out walls to build an addition,” Tyson says.

Those who attempt a pre-sale addition rarely recoup more than 50 percent to 60 percent of the money invested, he says. Moreover, any construction project that involves the removal of walls can be very time-consuming and stressful.

“Usually, the only time homeowners are smart to do a pre-sale addition is to replace an addition that was badly done or an eyesore,” Tyson says.

-- Avoid upgrades over neighborhood standards.

As your listing agent will likely tell you, your kitchen is a high-priority area when it comes to pre-sale improvements. If it’s a turnoff to buyers, many will pass on your place.

“But in your kitchen, as elsewhere in your house, the idea is to meet and not exceed neighborhood standards,” Tyson says.

For instance, if you have laminate countertops and the neighborhood standard calls for granite or quartz, you’ll want to upgrade. Still, if most other local properties still have laminate, you may not need to switch. Likewise, don’t replace regular kitchen appliances with high-end professional-quality ones unless your neighbors have the same.

Other kitchen upgrades are often less expensive. For example, new cabinet hardware is usually worth the expense. And the replacement of badly worn kitchen flooring also bears consideration.

Still, there are limits on how much you should spend in your kitchen, even if you’re living in a luxury community.

“Most buyers won’t pay you back for a major kitchen renovation,” Tyson says.

-- Focus heavily on the exterior look of your place.

The landscaping around your place is like the frame around a painting; it defines the entire image of the home.

But, as Tyson says, upgrading your landscaping need not be costly, assuming you’re resourceful and don’t inhabit a palatial estate.

“You’ll want to trim your shrubs and you’ll definitely, absolutely want to remove dead plants. A dead plant is a real turnoff,” he says.

For replacement plants, Tyson suggests you turn to a local nursery for free guidance on plant selection and design. Or look to a helpful neighbor with a green thumb. Most home sellers can dramatically improve the street-level appeal of their property by cutting back or replacing any overgrown shrubbery that shrouds their place. But no matter how majestic your home may be, it’s not necessary to install exotic plants or dazzling fountains to make it sell.

“Tearing out your whole landscaping plan and starting over is almost never called for and can be hugely costly. In this case, the perfect is the enemy of the good,” Tyson says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)

With grad school behind her, a public relations specialist told her real estate agent it was time to buy her first house. Topping her list of preferences: A two-story colonial built of stone.

But just days later, the woman bought a single-story contemporary with redwood siding. She’d fallen in love with the place, which featured a lush interior courtyard and three sun-filled bedrooms.

Situations like this true story prompt some in the real estate field to invoke the adage that “buyers are liars.” But real estate pros insist few buyers deliberately mislead their agents about what they want in a house or can afford to pay.

“Homebuyers tend to be more naive than anything else,” says Richard Courtney, a veteran real estate broker and author of a light-hearted book called “Buyers Are Liars and Sellers Are Too!”

He says it’s very possible for well-meaning people to insist they want one type of home only to change course and buy something entirely different.

“The main thing is to keep giving your agent accurate feedback about the homes you’re seeing,” Courtney says.

Sometimes homebuyers give their agents the wrong signals because they’ve failed to seriously consider their preferences and instead rely on conventional thinking, says Kerrie Kelly, an interior designer and spokesperson for Zillow, which tracks real estate markets all over the country.

For instance, homebuyers might automatically assume they’d prefer an all-white kitchen when they’d actually like one with lots of accents in a classic blue, currently a very popular choice.

“Homes with kitchens in a soft shade of blue are now selling for $1,800 more than those with all-white kitchens,” says Kelly, the creative director of her own design lab (kerriekelly.com).

Here are a few tips for buyers:

-- Start with a preliminary visit to a mortgage lender.

Courtney, who’s sold homes for more than three decades and works in the Nashville area, a music mecca, says he’s occasionally encountered wannabe buyers who are “delusional.”

“They come to town boasting about a $1 million recording or music publishing contract. Part of living out their fantasy is to look at some very expensive houses,” he says.

Realtors with experience are quick to identify those who claim they’re candidates for a mansion yet can’t even afford a more modest place. Chances are they’ll decline to show them property of any sort.

Though very few would-be buyers are delusional, Courtney says most need to see a mortgage lender to set a ceiling on what they can afford. That way, they won’t waste time looking at properties above their reach.

Eric Tyson, a personal finance expert and co-author of “Home Buying for Dummies,” says some buyers dread hearing the unembellished truth from a lender.

-- Seriously consider your authentic preferences before starting your search.

Once you know how much you can afford, it’s time to reflect on your true wants and needs -- and to do so with a spouse or a partner if you’re part of a couple.

Tyson suggests you retreat to a tranquil space, shut off your phones and discuss your priorities in a focused way.

Would you rather have a three-car garage or a fourth bedroom? Would you opt for a smaller house on a bigger lot or vice versa? These are questions no real estate agent can answer for you.

Of course, you may ultimately purchase something quite different than you had in mind during your initial soul-searching session. But you’re less likely to make a huge mistake if you’ve thought through your goals from the outset.

-- Reveal your authentic reactions to the homes you visit.

“Unfortunately, some buyers are so fearful of offending their agents that they suppress their true reactions to property they’re shown,” Tyson says.

But to avoid taking you further off track, your agent needs to hear your negative reactions to properties you don’t like.

“Yes, agents can surmise some of your reactions by noticing your body language. But don’t expect them to read your mind,” Tyson says.

-- Give a trusted agent some latitude to pre-screen properties for you.

Although you want your agent to be guided by your preferences, it’s also wise to allow the agent some latitude to occasionally add in a “wild card.” This is a home that your agent thinks you might like, even though it doesn’t meet all your search criteria.

Agents who are in sync with their clients’ reactions can sometimes guess when they’ll like a particular property, even one that doesn’t sound right on paper.

-- Don’t hang on to an agent who ignores your preferences.

Realtors generally pick up quickly on “buying signals,” indications that clients are seriously interested in a particular property. Beyond facial expressions and other body language, couples who like a home typically start talking about where they’d place their furniture or how they’d use particular rooms.

But in rare instances, real estate agents repeatedly fail to pick up on even the most overt messages conveyed by their clients. If your agent seems tone-deaf to your reactions, Tyson says it could be time for a change.

“Any agent who refuses to take seriously your legitimate homeownership goals has no one to blame but himself if you make a shift,” he says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)