Obviously, it’s not nearly as bad as post-traumatic stress from a combat experience or a shocking medical diagnosis -- but homebuyers who’ve lost out in multiple bidding wars can still suffer significant bouts of anxiety.

“People who put in strong offers yet get rejected anyway feel shellshocked and pretty exhausted,” says veteran real estate agent Stacy Berman.

“Some renters who lose out in bidding wars become dispirited and simply surrender to signing another year’s lease, despite a big jump in their rent,” says Art Godi, the broker-owner of an independent realty firm.

But Godi, a past president of the National Association of Realtors (nar.realtor), says that for truly motivated buyers, retreating from the real estate market is often a self-defeating strategy, given that home prices are continuing to rise.

“Maybe you’re not priced out of the market yet, but that could happen in the future, considering current trends,” Godi says.

Even so, Berman says those feeling dejected in the aftermath of losing out in 2021 bidding wars can benefit from taking a brief break from the competition.

“Don’t go house-hunting again for another week or two, but then get back at it with an open mind and a fresh approach,” she says.

While on their brief break, Godi encourages buyers to reflect on some of the emotional barriers that could be preventing them from full participation in the market.

“Regrettably, some buyers take it way too personally when other bidders beat them out. They feel diminished and have to address their underlying fears before moving on toward their buying goal,” he says.

The fear of losing out to other bidders is just one worry that afflicts homebuyers. Here are a few other common fears, with pointers on how to address them:

-- Fear of embarrassment about your credit history.

“Going to the lender’s office for preapproval can be a big breakthrough. People are often pleasantly surprised by what the lender tells them,” Godi says.

Of course, many prospective homeowners have flaws on their credit reports that must be fixed before mortgage approval is possible. Still, as Godi says, mortgage brokers and lenders often prove much more supportive than loan applicants anticipate.

“Call it jaded, but mortgage lenders have seen it all when it comes to credit reports. They aren’t going to be shocked or surprised no matter what your credit history reveals,” he says.

Most mortgage lenders rely on commissions and don’t get paid unless their clients get approved. This gives them a strong incentive to take the time and effort required to help rectify their clients’ problems.

-- Fear of selecting a property without the support of family.

Many would-be first-time buyers are in their 20s or 30s. On financial matters, they still look to their elders for direction and, not infrequently, for cash subsidies as well.

“I can’t tell you how many times buyers crave the support of wise family members when it comes to buying their first home. It’s a new experience that can feel exciting yet incredibly scary,” says Merrill Ottwein, a Coldwell Banker broker.

There’s nothing inherently wrong with seeking help from relatives. But Ottwein says you should request their involvement early on, not when you’re about to sign the papers to buy a place.

“Your family could be caught off-guard by a late-stage request for guidance. They might be needlessly negative and counsel you against a particular purchase in an attempt to shield you from an error,” says Ottwein, a past president of the National Association of Exclusive Buyer Agents (naeba.org).

If you’re afraid to go forward without your relatives’ guidance, but don’t want them to mess up your plans, he suggests you bring them along on all your house-hunting trips. That way they can compare various alternatives and are likely to give you more objective advice.

-- Fear of coming up short on the funds to close a home deal.

Granted, it can be costly to make a housing change at any stage of your life. But many first-time buyers overestimate their need for cash to go through the transition. They fail to take into account the reality that there are a multitude of low-to-no-down-payment mortgage programs available to them.

Ottwein says first-time buyers are well advised to explore these options as soon as they decide to make a purchase, rather than waiting until their savings accounts are brimming with funds.

“Before you head into a huge savings campaign, call an experienced mortgage lender. It’s possible that you may not need as large a down payment as you imagine,” he says.

-- Fear you will suffer from “buyer’s remorse.”

Given the stakes, many wannabe first-time buyers become highly risk-averse, worrying they’ll select the wrong home.

“For beginners, there’s a strong tendency to over-research the market; to gather more and more facts before making a commitment,” Godi says. “Psychologically, it’s an easier, safer course to keep searching for additional information than to make a decision.”

But waiting for absolute certainty can have its penalties.

“Through the years, I’ve seen many offers by first-time buyers turned down by sellers because they procrastinated on a decision,” Godi says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)

Many would-be home sellers are torn on timing. Should they put their place on the market by the end of this year or wait until the first quarter of 2022?

“As with the stock market, timing your home sale is a thorny matter. You have to weigh financial factors along with your personal moving plans,” says Sid Davis, author of “A Survival Guide to Selling a Home.”

As the country gradually emerges from COVID-19, planning seems all the more tricky for would-be sellers because many are reinventing their post-pandemic lives and reassembling their family gatherings.

“Especially now, homeowners hate the massive inconvenience of strangers trooping through their property ... They have a huge preference for an after-holiday sale,” says Davis, an independent real estate broker.

However, selling late this year has some positives associated with it, says Fred Meyer, a longtime broker-appraiser who lists homes around Harvard University.

“Mortgage rates are now lingering near unbelievable lows. They could rise steeply in 2022. This could somewhat weaken the sellers’ hand next year,” Meyer says.

But housing economists doubt sellers who postpone until early 2022 will miss the most opportune time to market their home.

At Realtor.com, chief economist Danielle Hale anticipates that the seller’s market will last well into 2022.

“Home prices continue to rise due to a mismatch between supply and demand, stemming from a decade-long shortage of homebuilding,” Hale says.

On rare occasions, a wise listing agent will recommend that sellers briefly defer their year-end sale. But Mark Nash, the author of “1001 Tips for Buying and Selling a Home, says homeowners with a compelling need to move before the end of the year should resist postponement.

“Remember how costly it is to hold off. The carrying costs for a vacant home include not only mortgage payments but also insurance and utility expenses,” he says.

Even so, those not under time pressure to move this December may wish to wait until January, February or even beyond to market their place. Here are a few pointers for sellers who intend to wait:

-- Seek to find a seasoned listing agent.

No matter where your house is located, it’s crucial to hire a listing agent with an established track record.

“An agent who’s been through at least 10 post-holiday periods should be especially good at identifying the best week and day to put your property on the market,” says Nash.

-- Embark on a cleaning blitz.

Once your New Year’s celebrations are behind you, your first challenge should be to remove any hints of holiday decor.

“Trying to show a property with holiday decor still in place signals to buyers that you’re not really ready to move,” Nash says.

After the decor is gone, Nash urges sellers to go on a cleaning binge, purging the property of all superfluous items and then making the whole place dust- and spot-free.

Sellers lacking a design-trained eye might consider engaging a home stager, a professional who helps reduce and then rearrange sellers’ furnishings for maximum appeal.

Even without a stager, most people can improve their interior through a few simple steps.

“One way to make a room look better is to remove up to half the furniture and then float your sofa and other pieces at an angle away from the walls,” Nash says.

-- Repaint your walls in a lighter tone.

Are you a homeowner who loves bold designer paint colors? That’s fine during your tenure in the property. But once your place is heading for the market, such colors are a poor choice, especially for a wintertime sale.

“I call colors like magenta, mustard and chocolate brown ‘commitment colors.’ ... (T)hey’re a bad idea for wintertime sellers because they make a place look even drearier on cloudy days,” Nash says.

However, when repainting your walls in advance of a sale, you needn’t pick sterile white to lighten and neutralize your look. Good choices include light grays or linenlike tones with just a hint of another pleasing color, such as very pale yellow.

-- Create a festive atmosphere around your wintertime sale.

Clearly, enthusiasm is in shorter supply during January and February than in the weeks leading up to the winter holidays. So it’s often helpful for you and your listing agent to develop a creative marketing strategy for your winter sale.

Nash recalls the true story of an Illinois couple whose listing agent was puzzled about how to attract home shoppers to what he describes as their “blah suburban house” that went up for sale one February.

What finally worked was a “Garden of Eden” theme, in keeping with the fact that the home’s owners were avid gardeners. Though their flowerbeds were buried in snow, the agent asked for photos showing their flowers blooming in summer. These were enlarged to poster size, mounted on tall easels and placed next to windows throughout the property.

The theme "created buzz among neighbors, real estate agents and buyers ... We all loved the break from winter because it was so hopeful, bright and cheerful,” Nash remembers.

Creative marketing won’t make up for an overly high price tag or a rundown property. But it can help entice shoppers -- and their agents -- into visiting a home they might otherwise have ignored.

“The simple goal of creative marketing is to encourage talk about your house and get eyeballs over to see it,” Nash says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)

Every year, researchers at the national realty company Zillow survey homebuyers on the factors that most impact their choices. This year, they were struck by an unusual finding: Many buyers picked property with their pets in mind.

“Pets are widely considered part of the American family, so it follows that they can factor into moving decisions,” says Manny Garcia, a population scientist at Zillow.

The new Zillow research, drawn from its “Consumer Housing Trends Report,” shows that those currently planning a property purchase are more likely than in the past to be pet owners, which is affecting buying trends.

Indeed, Garcia says pet ownership can be the “catalyst for a move, along with other factors, such as remote work and shifting family priorities.”

Buyers with pets typically want a property with substantial internal and external space.

“Pet owners are more likely to buy homes larger than 3,000 square feet and with at least four bedrooms. They consider outdoor space very or extremely important,” according to Garcia.

Daniel Boitel, a real estate agent specializing in luxury home sales, says the pandemic, along with an increase in pet ownership, has helped to revive interest in communities with large properties that were previously considered less desirable because of their outlying location.

“Buyers with furry friends want a property that’s move-in ready -- ideally one with a large, flat and fenced-in yard,” Boitel says. He’s currently working with a family of seven who own two oversized Labrador retrievers. They’re searching for a spacious place that accommodates both pets and small children.

He's found that the pet-owning parents of young kids typically want similar home features for the kids as for their animals.

“For the entire family, if possible, they wish to live on a dead-end street that’s quiet and sheltered from traffic. A cul-de-sac is perfect, as is a fenced-in yard,” Boitel says.

Most real estate markets are less fiercely competitive than they were during the worst of the pandemic. But the reality is that prices continue to escalate, although more slowly, and nearly all home buyers must confront trade-offs in lifestyle to attain the most they can afford.

Where you choose to live has countless implications, says Doro Kiley, a certified life coach who’s helped many clients navigate real estate transitions. She urges clients to make a home choice within the context of their overall life plans.

“Always begin by thinking about the end product -- what you’d really like as opposed to what you would settle for,” Kiley says.

Here are a few pointers for buyers:

-- Consider the pros and cons of a large yard.

Recalling their own easygoing childhoods, some parents assume their kids need a similar setting to be happy. But what was important in your formative years isn’t necessarily vital for your children now, says Eric Tyson, a personal finance specialist and co-author of “Home Buying for Dummies.”

“These days, children are much more heavily scheduled with sports, lessons and numerous other activities,” Tyson says.

Now that most kids are back to their in-person classrooms, he encourages parents to think less about yard size than the outdoor features of a neighborhood as a whole, such as parks and open space.

Surprisingly, neighborhoods where yards are smaller are often more child-friendly than those with oversized grounds.

“It’s good for children to live close to their neighborhood friends. That way they don’t have to be driven around to see playmates,” Tyson says.

-- Place a premium on a floor plan that works well for your family.

Tyson says it’s more important for families with young children to have a floor plan that encourages togetherness than to own a property with an exceptionally large yard.

“Many people only use a formal dining room on major holidays, such as Thanksgiving. But a family room connected to an eat-in kitchen is used all year long,” he says.

Large, comfortable common rooms -- often called “great rooms”-- help draw children out of their bedrooms, thereby allowing parents to monitor their kids at homework time, for example.

“It’s important to know if your kids are spending too much time playing video games rather than doing their work,” Tyson says.

-- Think of interior as well as exterior space.

Newly built houses with a wealth of elbow room typically feature spacious master bedroom suites. In such houses, secondary bedrooms, designed for children and guests, are usually much smaller.

But Tyson says it’s more important for families to have an adequate number of bedrooms than a luxurious master suite.

“People who have fond memories of sharing a bedroom with a sibling may be fine with that sort of setup. However, nowadays most buyers really want a separate bedroom for every kid, so all the children can get enough sleep, even if they have different school schedules,” he says.

-- Realize that a two-story house should give you more space for the money.

Many current buyers favor single-level living. Those who’ve hit middle age or beyond are especially likely to prefer a one-story house that won’t compel them to rely on stairs.

But Tyson says people with school-age children might wish to consider the advantages of living on two levels. That’s because it’s easier to contain the noise and mess of growing children if their bedrooms are separated from the family’s common living space.

With a two-story house, parents can entertain guests on the first level while their kids are playing upstairs. Also, young families can typically get more space for the money in a two-story house.

“In most areas, the key component of housing costs are land costs. Because two-story houses require less land, you usually get more house for the same price,” Tyson says. (To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)