DEAR NATALIE: My dad is about to remarry. Our mom died about three years ago and he met someone last spring and got engaged pretty quickly. She’s younger than me and my brother, which is weird to us. We have been trying to embrace his new relationship, but it has been challenging to say the least. I’m not sure what to do now that they are about to get married. I don’t want to attend the wedding. I think it is very embarrassing that I’m 27 and my brother is 30 and this “fiancée” is 26. My dad is 50. His sister (my aunt) has said he’s moving too fast, but he says that he is “in love” and she makes him happy. I haven’t really spent much time with her, but my dad is fairly wealthy and I wonder about her motives. They also have talked about having another child together. It really makes me feel like he’s moving on to a new family. My brother said that I have to go to the wedding to avoid drama. I don’t know what to do. What do you think? –SHE’S TOO YOUNG FOR DAD 

DEAR SHE’S TOO YOUNG FOR DAD: Your dad went through a tremendous loss – as did you all – when your mother died. And while she can never be replaced, he’s still young and has a lot of life ahead of him. And while it is perhaps “annoying” that the woman he is with is much younger than him (and could be your sibling) what can you do? You have to let him live his life. Now, with that in mind, you can also share with him how you feel. You can tell him that while you understand his need to turn the page, you don’t want him to forget what has already been written. I’ve seen this before where people go on to have “second families” and neglect the children they had with their first wife or husband. Talk to your dad. You can express these feelings and also go to the wedding. Make an effort to get to know his new fiancée. She may feel uncomfortable, too, because she knows how old everyone in the family is. As far as the money is concerned, ask yourself this: Is dad happy? If he is and she treats him well, then let it be. Coming in between them unless you have an incredible reason to do so is only going to further divide your family further. 

DEAR NATALIE: My younger brother and I have been trying to get our parents to downsize their home for a year or so. They are both older (in their late 80s) and refuse to recognize the moment that they are in. They have cluttered up the place so badly, it’s honestly hard to walk through and my mom has fallen at least once in the last six months because she tripped over things. I don’t know what to do at this point because they won’t listen to anyone. They both need extra care and living alone makes us very nervous. To make matters worse, our older sister is on “their side” and doesn’t think they should move until they are ready. We think she is in denial. She is over there constantly trying to clean and cook for them. I don’t think she realizes how enabling this behavior has become so that they can continue to use her as a nursemaid free of charge. She says she doesn’t mind, but I think her kids and husband are starting to struggle with her choice to be there constantly. How do we get our sister on board so that we have a united front to deal with this more effectively? 

– PARENT TRAP

DEAR PARENT TRAP: It can be incredibly frustrating when parents or aging relatives dig their heels in. Maybe it’s pride. Maybe it’s fear. Maybe it’s simply they don’t want to leave their home and start over in a new place. Is there a way, instead, to bring in a cleaning team or someone to make meals for them? If that’s not a solution, is there a way to share the workload with your sister so that everything isn’t falling on her shoulders? Perhaps she feels obligated to do these things if you aren’t offering to pitch in. If your parents really can’t be in this home anymore, you may want to call a few nursing homes or assisted living facilities to see if they recommend any social workers or mediators that can come to the house and share with them their options. Unfortunately, there isn’t much you can do other than talk with your parents regularly and try to plant the seed in hopes that it blooms.

Please send your questions to Natalie Bencivenga to

asknatalieadvice@gmail.com.

Check out her radio show every Saturday from 2-5pm EST on KDKA Radio 1020AM, 100.1FM, stream it on the

Audacy app or at www.kdkaradio.com

Watch her award-winning video series with Pennsylvania Capital Star, Facts Over Fear: www.penncapital-star.com

Follow Natalie on Instagram @NatalieBencivenga

DEAR NATALIE: My fiancé recently died in a car accident and it has been incredibly difficult for the entire family. In my fiancé’s will, he left a substantial portion of his estate to me and a life insurance policy, as well. His kids are upset about this and have told me that I am “not welcome” to attend the memorial that will be held in a few weeks. I am heartbroken. I was with him for over a decade and while we did not officially tie the knot, our plan was to get married this year. I feel hurt and disappointed that his children are treating me this way. Their mother died many years ago, and I’ve known them since they were teens. I was hoping that they would want to be closer, but instead, they are pushing me away. What should I do? I don’t want things to “end” this way. The tragedy of it all is already too much. – I LOST MY LOVE

DEAR I LOST MY LOVE: I am so sorry for the untimely death of your fiancé. I can’t imagine how difficult this must be for you and for the family. Clearly, his children are taking their grief, anger and frustration out on you. Since you have a few weeks until the memorial, I would write them a letter. Share with them how you feel. Tell them that you love them. Let them know that you would like to be there for them. Explain to them that you are hurting, too, and it would be healthier for everyone if you can grieve together. The memorial isn’t just a place for grieving, but a place for celebrating his life. You want to celebrate with them. Hopefully, they just need a beat to ground themselves and realize that their hurtful words are just causing even more harm. Whatever you do, don’t “ask” for their permission to attend. Just say that you will be attending to support them and to honor their father’s legacy and that you hope they can understand that. 

DEAR NATALIE: I’m in a complicated situation with this guy I am seeing and I just found out that I’m pregnant. I live in a deep red state and having an abortion here is pretty much impossible. My “situationship” has offered to drive me out of state to have a procedure done if there aren’t any other alternatives. He does not want to be a father and since I’m not sure where we stand, I am not sure what to do. The wrinkle in all of this is that he is in a very prominent role in the community and is married. He has been pressuring me to get this done very quickly and I feel like I haven't had any time to wrap my brain around it. What if I want to keep it? What should I say? Not sure that I do, but I’m also feeling confused and scared. Thoughts?

– SITUATION NOT IDEAL

DEAR SITUATION NOT IDEAL: You need to take a few days to sit with a life altering decision and what that means for you. If you choose to terminate the pregnancy, how will your life be impacted? Do you have supports in place to help you through this difficult time? If you choose to carry the pregnancy to term, how will that impact your future? Would you want to bring a child into the world knowing the situation with the father most likely will remain tense if not hostile? If you are not one hundred percent committed to the idea of motherhood at this moment, I wouldn’t do it. I know you are in a terrible predicament, but so many people I’ve known have had abortions and then gone on to have wonderful families when the timing was better. Don’t let anyone shame you into keeping this pregnancy – or terminating it. Only you can decide what you want your future to look like but in any case – abort this relationship immediately.

Please send your questions to Natalie Bencivenga to

asknatalieadvice@gmail.com.

Check out her radio show every Saturday from 2-5pm EST on KDKA Radio 1020AM, 100.1FM, stream it on the

Audacy app or at www.kdkaradio.com

Watch her award-winning video series with Pennsylvania Capital Star, Facts Over Fear: www.penncapital-star.com

Follow Natalie on Instagram @NatalieBencivenga

and on TikTok @NatalieBencivenga

DEAR NATALIE: I was totally blindsided by my boyfriend breaking up with me over the holidays. We have been together for five years and have been looking at homes. I thought he was going to be proposing over Christmas, but instead on New Year’s Eve, he told me that, “he couldn’t start another year with me and this was our last day together.” Literal exact words. He has moved out of our apartment since and I have heard through some friends that he has already been seeing one of our mutual friends. I want to confront him about this as I feel we have unfinished business. He didn’t give me a reason for the breakup and I am truly horrified that I wasted so many years with this liar. How do I deal with him, and how do I confront the woman he is with? She clearly helped break us up. Advice? –BAD START TO 2025

DEAR BAD START TO 2025: Thank goodness that you didn’t get engaged to this guy. While it may hurt a lot right now, the universe is clearly protecting you. I can understand why you would still feel as though you need closure after five years together. You can’t just turn off your feelings. But I have to ask you this: What will you gain from a conversation with someone who has so little respect for you? You may end up feeling much worse than you already do. I wouldn’t give this guy any more power over you. Instead, if you want to express yourself, write him a letter. Send it to him or burn it after you write it. Either way, this gives you the opportunity to say exactly what it is you need to say without him gaslighting you or deflecting his feelings.  As for her, whether or not she broke up your relationship doesn’t really matter at this point. I would ice her out and move on. The best revenge is a happy life. Don’t let either of them steal that from you. 

DEAR NATALIE: My wife and I have been together for seven years and we’ve decided that we want to have a baby. The only issue is, since we are both women, we have to decide who should carry the baby. We both want to do it. I have always dreamed of being pregnant and the idea of having a child with the woman I love and carrying our baby is something I want to do. She has similar feelings. Our mothers say that we should flip a coin. My doctor says we should go in for exams and see who might be the “best candidate” to carry a baby. I feel like this is starting to turn into the Hunger Games. What should we do? – BABY HUNGER GAMES

DEAR BABY HUNGER GAMES: While I love the idea of flipping a coin, I would err on the side of science for this one. It may be easier for one of you to become pregnant and also carry safely to term. Why not consult with a doctor first? If there really isn’t much of a difference between either of you carrying the baby, then you may have to decide through open and honest communication. How many children do you want to have? Perhaps one of you tries first and then the other if you want a second child? If you want to be one and done, you have to sit down and talk this through. You may want to engage a couples’ therapist who is well versed on fertility issues to guide you. The last thing you want to do is have this come between you. At the end of the day, this child will be lucky to be born into such a loving home with two parents. Remember that’s the goal at the end of the day.

Please send your questions to Natalie Bencivenga to

asknatalieadvice@gmail.com.

Check out her radio show every Saturday from 2-5pm EST on KDKA Radio 1020AM, 100.1FM, stream it on the

Audacy app or at www.kdkaradio.com

Watch her award-winning video series with Pennsylvania Capital Star, Facts Over Fear: www.penncapital-star.com

Follow Natalie on Instagram @NatalieBencivenga

and on TikTok @NatalieBencivenga