DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My son met a woman who started working as a cashier at the pharmacy where he’s an assistant manager. She is the divorced mother of two tweens, and my son just turned 23. He has been in two longer-term relationships, and both of his former girlfriends ended things after over a year together. I think if that hadn’t been the case, he would have been married by now.

I have met his new girlfriend and she seems like a nice person. I also feel my son is a good judge of character. But I worry about him stepping into a ready-made family, with kids not that much younger than he is. There is also the ex-husband, who from what he’s heard, is still very involved in his kids’ lives.

I think it’s a lot for my son to take on, and often wonder if I should say something to him about my feelings. It would not be about his girlfriend, but just her situation in life versus his. Or, do I continue keeping my worries to myself? --- MOM ON THE FENCE

DEAR MOM ON THE FENCE: You state that your son’s a good judge of character. That and the fact that at a fairly young age he’s been put in a management role, albeit a junior one, suggest to me he may be more mature than many of his peers.

Even if you had less reason to have faith in your son’s judgement, I’m not sure anything would be gained by sharing your concerns with him about his new relationship. Time will tell if this one’s a keeper, and it’s ultimately up to him and his new girlfriend to decide if they can make it work, especially with her children as part of the picture.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My mom and dad split when I was really young, and my dad moved away and started a new family. My mom raised my brother and me mostly on her own, although my dad always supported us financially, including paying for college.

He wanted us both to become lawyers, like him, which suited my brother, but not me. I am working on my master’s in social work, and while I am paying for that myself, my dad always makes sure he lets me know what a mistake he thinks I’m making. He tells me I could do more good in the world by being a state’s attorney, or even working as a public defender, if I want to be of use to others. He thinks I am throwing away a good mind on a mediocre career.

I am perfectly happy with the path I’m taking. I can think of no better way to serve my community than the one I’ve chosen, regardless of what my father thinks.

Why can’t he lay off his criticism and just support my goals? --- NOT MY FATHER

DEAR NOT MY FATHER: It’s hard to be a parent and not have a vision for how you think your child’s life should or could go.

You’re following your own dreams, in your own way, and as I see it, the best you can do for now is to continue reminding your father of that. He’s perhaps been very happy with his career choices, and now you need to affirm that you’ve found what you believe will make you equally happy, and that you have the same right as he did to make your own way in the field of your choosing.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: Since moving into our house less than five years ago, we have repainted our living room/dining room, kitchen, and lower half bath twice each. We have also arranged and rearranged the furniture in every room at least five times. Nothing seems to satisfy my wife, who is good about not always spending money besides for paint, but can’t seem to be happy with even her own redesigns.

I am glad my wife has what my mother keeps calling “house pride”, but it gets to be a lot, especially since the painting eats up so much of our weekend time. It’s like it’s a hobby or something for my wife, but I would like to get other things done, not just around the house.

When is enough redecorating enough? --- NO MORE PAINTING, PLEASE

DEAR NO MORE PAINTING, PLEASE: Have you let your wife know you’re burning out on the updates? She may think this is something you enjoy to the same extent as she apparently does.

One suggestion would be to tell her how much you like the current configuration, and that you just want to enjoy it for a while.

Another idea is to help her explore different ways to channel her creative energy. It could still be home-related, such as some decorative art or craft that she could explore, which would likewise enhance the look of your home, without redoing rooms every few months.