DEAR ABBY: I'm a 19-year-old woman, hardworking and married to my best friend. Life is amazing!

So what's my problem? I burn out of jobs quickly. I'll start a job and absolutely love it, but within six months the things that I once loved about the job start to drive me crazy. Within a year, I hate my job and put in my two-week notice. It's not that I have problems finding jobs -- I'm well-groomed, speak well and I'm enthusiastic.

I have recently considered enlisting in the Air Force. (My husband is on active duty.) I am absolutely thrilled about it, but I'm afraid I'll eventually start hating my job and it's something I'll be stuck with. How do I overcome this? -- WANTS TO ENLIST

DEAR WANTS TO ENLIST: Please stop and re-read your letter. Are you aware that you're talking about work the way a schoolgirl talks about romance -- blind, grand passion until reality sets in, then on to the next one?

A job isn't like that. While it can be rewarding on many levels, when the novelty fades it is still work. There are good days and ones that are less so, co-workers who are a pleasure and some who are a challenge. Sometimes it's stimulating and sometimes it's an effort.

Years ago there was a letter in this column that read: "Dear Abby: I joined the Navy to see the world. I've seen it. Now how do I get out?" I don't want a letter like that from you.

Military life is rewarding, but it can also be demanding, frustrating and dangerous. It requires making a commitment and sticking with it even after the going gets tough. With your short attention span and low tolerance for frustration, I don't recommend you take any job that requires a signed contract guaranteeing you won't leave.

DEAR ABBY: My friend and I have a massage therapist, "Shelby," whom we hire on a regular basis because she does an excellent job. However, it's hard to get a completely relaxing massage because she likes to talk the whole time.

What's the nicest and most polite way to inform Shelby that we prefer peace and quiet so we can enjoy the massage? -- RUBBED THE WRONG WAY IN COLORADO

DEAR RUBBED THE WRONG WAY: Shelby is not your buddy; she's a professional who has been hired to perform a service. When you make your next appointment and she starts talking, say, "Shelby, when you talk during the massage, it makes it difficult for me to relax. Right now, I need to completely relax, and conversation is distracting." If that doesn't clearly -- and politely -- convey your message, then you need to find a massage therapist who is less verbal.

DEAR ABBY: I hired a pet sitter to stay in my home for two days to care for my dog. (I have used him in the past.) After 24 hours of no response to my texts or phone calls, I asked a neighbor to check on my dog. The sitter never showed up. My dog had been left alone with no food or walks.

Should I alert his other clients about what happened? I have this person's client email list. It's possible that other pets were also neglected. -- ANGRY PET OWNER IN HOUSTON

DEAR ANGRY: Pet sitting is a sacred obligation, and if the sitter is for some reason unable to fulfill that responsibility, there should be a backup plan in place in case of emergency. Unless your sitter had a life-threatening emergency, by all means warn the other clients.

DEAR ABBY: My marriage has been on the rocks since 2008, when I caught my husband talking to other girls online. He swore he would never do it again and I trusted him, only for it to happen again and again. We have a 2-year-old and I'm pregnant with our second child.

He has now placed another ad online stating that he's a single dad. I am torn. He keeps telling me he loves me and wants only me, and he doesn't know what's wrong with him. He is bipolar and not taking meds for it. He promised this time he will get help and try to get better.

This is the fifth time he has placed an ad or chatted with other girls online. I don't know if I should call it quits or keep trying. I love him and want us to be a family, but I don't know how much more I can take. -- TORN IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR TORN: Because you still love your husband, make his taking his medication a condition of your continuing the marriage. He needs to be willing to prove to you that he wants you to stay. If he won't do that, then you will have to decide if this is the way you want to spend the rest of your life. And please, for your sake and that of your kids, don't have more children with him until you're sure your marriage is on solid ground.

DEAR ABBY: I'm an independent, never-married woman who has been holding out for the right man. I finally found him in "Wayne," a 49-year-old widower with two adult daughters.

Wayne and I have been together for a year -- living together for six months -- but his daughters still refuse to meet me. Wayne says they need time because they lost their mother only two years ago and aren't ready to accept anyone else in his life. The rest of his family has been welcoming and sweet. I'm invited to some family functions, but allowed to attend only those that Wayne's daughters won't be at.

I feel like I am able to share only part of his life and nothing will move forward until his children accept me. I love Wayne. I have searched my whole life for someone like him. How long is long enough to wait? What if they never do? -- ON THE SIDELINES

DEAR ON THE SIDELINES: You have assessed your situation correctly. You are sharing only part of Wayne's life, and won't be moving forward until his adult daughters accept you or Wayne asserts himself. Wayne should be ashamed of himself. He should have introduced you to his daughters when you started living together. As his partner, you should not have been excluded from any family functions. As long as Wayne does nothing, nothing will change.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have worked hard and spent our money carefully. We are almost ready to pay off our home. I would love to have a "mortgage-burning" party, but I'm worried about showing off in this uncertain economy. Can we have this party, or should we just make our last payment and be quiet? -- THRILLED IN SAN JOSE

DEAR THRILLED: Taking into consideration that many people have not been as fortunate as you in spite of the fact that they too worked hard, lived frugally and followed all the rules, my advice is to have a quiet celebration with your husband and forgo the party.

DEAR ABBY: As a clinical psychologist, I believe your advice to "Protective Mom in the Midwest" (Oct. 26) was oversimplified. You told her she was right in not permitting her husband's brother, a registered sex offender, to visit the family during the holidays. She didn't want her 10-year-old daughter around him.

You have made the common mistake of seeing everyone who carries the "registered sex offender" label as alike. They are no more alike than are people who drink too much. Some alcoholics get drunk, angry and violent, but most do not. Some sex offenders act like Ted Bundy, but most do not. Some are guilty only of having a younger girlfriend.

Many do not directly injure anyone because they only download illegal sexual images. Some do not use force, threats or physical violence. I do not minimize what they do. They all have a mental illness and/or addiction and need intervention and treatment.

Mom and her husband should talk to the brother about what he did and what kind of rehabilitation has occurred. They can then make a better decision about a visit and what safety measures might be appropriate. -- DR. WILLIAM S. IN MIAMI

DEAR DR. S.: Your point about lumping all sex offenders together is well-stated. Another reader pointed out that something like urinating outdoors could result in this classification. However, most readers agree with me that the safety of the 10-year-old must be the primary concern. Their comments:

DEAR ABBY: Stand your ground, "Protective Mom"! As a victim of abuse, I can tell you that the abuser is sick. She should not leave it up to her daughter to find out if the uncle could still be a predator.

My stepfather's abuse 30 years ago was never reported to the police. He supposedly got "counseling" and was "a changed man." Well, he's currently serving prison time for having molested his granddaughter a year and a half ago. -- KNOWS THE SCORE IN ANAHEIM, CALIF.

DEAR ABBY: If Mom allows Jake in the house, local child protective authorities will consider it failure to protect the child, putting the girl at risk of being removed from the home. I am a former child protective worker who went to homes to inform parents of this. I also had to keep my own daughter away from my former in-laws because they allowed a sex offender to visit while she was there. It was difficult being the only one willing to stand up for her safety, but I will never regret knowing I did everything I could to keep my daughter safe. -- ANOTHER PROTECTIVE MOM IN NEW ENGLAND

DEAR ABBY: All children should be educated as early as they can understand about issues of trust. Mom will have to watch her daughter every second Jake is around, but she shouldn't deny her husband the right to have his family come for the holidays. Perhaps he could arrange for his brother to stay at a hotel. Mom can't be with her child 24/7, so kids need to know how to handle adults who are dangerous. -- GLORIA IN CLEVELAND

DEAR ABBY: I am a sex offender and have learned through therapy why I did what I did and how to not go around where "it" may happen again. Would Jake even accept an offer to stay over? If he's like me, he'd say, "Thanks, but no thanks," and not put himself in a situation where someone could cry rape or accuse him of unwanted fondling. -- MOVING ON

DEAR ABBY: We have a registered sex offender living in our neighborhood. Despite the fact that I have young children, I am not concerned that he presents a threat. When he was 19, he had sex with a 17-year-old girl. He was tried and served his time, but he now gets to spend the rest of his life on "the list." If he had been 40, or the girl 12, I'd be concerned. Without knowing the particulars of the crime, it seems rash to sentence Uncle Jake to family purgatory. -- ANDY IN LOUISIANA