DEAR ABBY: I was in a relationship (nine months) up until about a month ago. Without going into a lot of detail, the guy I was seeing ghosted me without any warning. We had a great conversation on a Thursday night, and Friday morning he blocked my calls, email, etc. I have no idea what happened.

The night before, I accidentally FaceTimed him (my phone was in my pocket), and his son answered. I thought he had called me, but apparently, I called him. Keep in mind I had never met his son the entire time we were together. This isn't the first time he has stopped speaking to me for reasons only he knows, but this is the first time he has gone this far.

I'm trying to move past it, but I'm having a hard time. Even though we dated for only nine months, I talked to him about everything, and we had such great times together. I want to understand why he did what he did to get some closure, but I don't know what to do. Do I need to just let this go? -- GHOSTED AGAIN IN ALABAMA

DEAR GHOSTED AGAIN: Your ex may have been upset because, until your FaceTime call, his son didn't know he was seeing anyone. I'm not a mind reader, and neither are you. You stated that this isn't the first time he has clammed up and given you the silent treatment. A relationship based on such immaturity and poor communication skills would not be healthy for you anyway. Stanch your bleeding and move on. You have my sympathy.

DEAR ABBY: My mother, who is 85, lives under the domination of my 88-year-old father. After retirement, Dad has remained active and has taken up hobbies that fill the entire house. Mom was an award-winning photographer, but medical issues now prevent her from enjoying that activity the way she used to. She has always enjoyed music and had a keyboard she felt comfortable playing, but only when Dad was away. My father tends to be very critical, which is why I think she would only play in private.

Recently, thinking Mom no longer used it, my dad donated her keyboard. He said it was taking up space. Mom recently confided to me that she was devastated when it happened. I would like to purchase another keyboard for Mom for her birthday, but I don't want her to feel betrayed. I'm not sure if I should talk with Dad about it beforehand. He is sure to ask Mom why she wasn't more vocal about her feelings in the first place, thus putting her in an uncomfortable position. Do you have any suggestions? -- LOVING DAUGHTER IN WASHINGTON

DEAR DAUGHTER: Have a chat with dear old Dad. Tell him what you plan to do and why. If he expresses puzzlement about why you're doing it, point out that between the two of them his is the dominant personality, which may be why your mother didn't speak up on her own behalf. While you're at it, suggest that the next time he has the urge to dispose of your mother's property, he should first ask how she feels about it. It may be a wake-up call he needs.

DEAR ABBY: I have a friend, a gay man in his 60s. We met while we worked for the same company 11 years ago, and have stayed in touch even after I moved out of state. He has never had a relationship. He didn't have a great childhood or upbringing, and his self-esteem is low. Because of his poor eating and living habits, he is now in a nursing home and dependent on others for his care.

My problem is, he's very needy and he calls me regularly to talk. We have little in common (politically, spiritually, emotionally) but he keeps me on the phone for one, two or even three hours -- usually late in the evening -- until I finally tell him I am sleepy and need to go to bed. I hate to not take his call, but I cringe when I see it's him calling. Sometimes I tell him I'm watching an important TV program or have to get up early (even when I don't).

I don't want to hurt his feelings. I have tried to be there for him, although he ignores my advice about anything related to health or finances or being proactive about his care. He's very self-effacing and doesn't want to offend anyone. I'm not really helping other than to provide contact. (He has others as well.) Could you tell me what I could say to him without hurting him? -- KIND LADY IN THE NORTHWEST

DEAR KIND LADY: You need to decide how much time you want to devote to listening to this poor man. Would 30 minutes every few weeks be workable for you? When you see it's him calling, do not pick up if you don't feel in the mood for the conversation.

DEAR ABBY: I've noticed for the past several years that my wife of more than 40 years has been "forgetting" to wear her wedding and engagement rings. Her excuses were that the rings didn't fit anymore or were causing a rash, etc. I thought she might be embarrassed over the size of the diamond compared to her friends' rings, so I had the rings resized to fit her finger and offered to buy her a larger diamond ring. She changed her mind about the diamond size after recognizing how much it would cost.

Now I'm wondering if I'm being too "controlling" or unreasonable for expecting her to wear her rings. I understand there are times that rings should not be worn for fear of damage. What are your thoughts? -- DEVOTED HUSBAND IN THE SOUTH

DEAR HUSBAND: Some women no longer want to wear expensive jewelry for fear of being assaulted and robbed. A wedding ring isn't supposed to function like the brand on a bovine. Not every wife wears one. (Need I point out that many married men forgo wearing them as well?) If someone is married in their heart, they may not feel they need the symbol. Unless you're worried your wife may be cheating, my advice to you is to ease up.

DEAR ABBY: For years, I've heard about what and where a woman "should" be in her life once she turns the big 3-0. She should have a thriving career, be married with kids -- or at least engaged -- and have a full sense of her worth and knowledge.

I recently turned the big 3-0, but my cards aren't all stacked that way. I have never had a romantic relationship. Most of the men I wanted to start one with only wanted sex with me, and a relationship with someone else. As I entered my late 20s, I began rejecting men who showed signs of wanting only a sexual relationship, and now I seem to have no takers at all. The fact that I have gained weight hasn't helped, either. It's not like once I meet a guy the first thing I say is, "Hey, I want a meaningful relationship." I'm beginning to worry that something is wrong with me. What should I do? -- THIRTY BUT NOT FLIRTY

DEAR THIRTY: There is nothing wrong with you, just as there is nothing wrong with getting to know someone before embarking on a physical relationship. (In fact, I recommend it.) However, to eliminate a man because you think he "only" is interested in having sex with you was jumping the gun.

I wish you had mentioned where you were meeting men. You may have better luck if you figure out what interests you have in common with the men you meet, and develop relationships based on them. And, because you suspect the weight you have gained may have something to do with your problem, resolve to become involved in physical activities that will get you out of the house and into an environment where you'll not only get some exercise, but also meet some eligible prospects.

DEAR ABBY: I've been married to my husband, "Asher," for 20 years, and during our marriage, I have always been the person who plans and throws birthday parties, including his. I gave him a large surprise party for his 40th birthday.

Abby, this whole time, nobody has thrown me a party or planned a celebration centered on me. I'm lucky to get a last-minute, store-bought cake and a dinner out on my birthday. Our 50th birthdays are coming up in a few months, and friends and family are asking what I'm planning for him, but nobody says anything about mine.

I resent that these people, including Asher, take me for granted, and I'm considering digging in my heels on party planning this time around. I have told Asher that maybe it's about time somebody planned ME a party, but he doesn't seem to get it. Have you any advice for me? I like a nice celebration, but I'm tired of being the one doing all the work without reciprocation. -- PARTY GIRL IN THE SOUTH

DEAR PARTY GIRL: While you can't control how other people behave, there is nothing wrong with enlisting some "help" in your planning. Express your feelings (again) to your self-involved husband and also to the friends and relatives who have enjoyed your hospitality for so long without reciprocating. Plan the party for Asher, and if your birthday is again ignored, plan something special you might like with your closest friends -- preferably, out of town -- and follow through. I think you are entitled, don't you?