DEAR ABBY: I have been with my boyfriend for three years, and it has been great. However, he has serious anger issues that affect our relationship sometimes. It started with small arguments here and there. But as our relationship progressed, so did his mood swings and anger.

He has never hit me. Lately, though, his anger has gotten worse, and he says cruel things to me that he later apologizes for. During our arguments, he never listens to what I have to say. When the argument is over and I wait a couple days to explain how he hurt my feelings, he tells me I'm overly sensitive and to leave the past in the past.

During our last argument, he asked me how to seek professional help. How can I help him? Am I dumb staying with someone like this? Although I love him, I don't know how long I can last with someone who is so angry all the time. -- BROKEN IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR BROKEN: Ask your doctor or your insurance provider for a referral to a psychologist who can either help your boyfriend or get him into an anger-management class. He definitely needs professional help, and it's good that he knows it.

Although my knee-jerk impulse would be to tell you to end the relationship, that he is self-aware enough to know he needs help makes me inclined to suggest you stick with him a little longer and see how effective the therapy is. But please know that verbal abusers often become physical abusers if they don't receive help, and the verbal bashing is terrible for your self-esteem.

DEAR ABBY: I recently served on a committee to hire a professional-level staff member for my organization. Eligible candidates are required to possess a bachelor's degree or higher. We received more than 30 applications and decided to bring in three candidates for interviews who looked great on paper.

One of them had his phone on and it repeatedly buzzed with incoming messages during the interview. Another, when asked if she had any questions for us, pulled her phone out of her jacket pocket and started swiping the screen saying that she had some questions on her phone. Abby, she had a notepad open in front of her, so why didn't she have her questions written on that?

I found it unsettling that these two candidates couldn't disengage from their phones long enough to participate in a job interview! It made me wonder if they could disconnect from their cellphones long enough to do the job, if hired. Am I showing my age -- and value system -- in thinking that a job interview should be a phone-free zone? What's the etiquette in such a situation? -- UNIMPRESSED IN THE SOUTH

DEAR UNIMPRESSED: The "etiquette" is that a job candidate should be prepared before a job interview. Cellphones should be turned off or put on silent mode during the interview so they won't cause a distraction. Make sure the applicant understands this before the interview begins. As for Candidate Two, ideally she should have written her questions on the notepad she brought with her, although members of her generation often put things like that on their cellphones. A younger interviewer may have let this slide. You didn't. Next candidate!

DEAR ABBY: I have been married to my wife for a little over a year. I love her. However, right before our wedding, I met a co-worker I'll call "Alexis." We hit it off, and I consider her a close friend.

Alexis and I hooked up a few times before and after my wedding. We never discuss the encounters after they happen. After we've had a few drinks, we both say things about being together, but usually, we're just best friends. While my friends believe this is odd, it's almost a blessing that the awkward conversation doesn't happen after a night of something happening.

There have been instances when I have ditched my wife to hang out with Alexis -- not to do anything, but just to hang out with her and her mother. My wife says I spend too much time with Alexis between work and after work, but she's fun to be with. My wife is kind of a homebody. She doesn't like to go out and have a good time.

My wife doesn't trust Alexis, and while I can't blame her, I'm conflicted about what my next step should be. I love my wife, but I also love Alexis as more than a friend, and I know she feels the same. What should I do next? -- LOVES THEM BOTH

DEAR LOVES: You may love both of these women, but you are being fair to neither one. Your wife doesn't trust Alexis because she senses something is wrong -- and she's right. You and Alexis aren't buddies; you are lovers. That you have confided it to friends "who think this is odd" (in your words) means it is just a matter of time until your wife is in on the secret. Your first loyalty should be to your wife. At the very least, you owe it to her to have an honest discussion with her and figure out with her what the next steps should be.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been going to the same dentist for 20 years. We have always had the same dental hygienist. There's a computer in the room where she works, and she always schedules our next six-month cleaning with her before we leave. Over the years, we have noticed that she's not very clean. She is sometimes very unkempt -- with greasy hair and body odor. Her treatment room is also very messy. The last time I was there, she opened her cupboard, and I was appalled at the junk crammed in there. We are concerned that this is unsanitary and we no longer want to see her.

We love our dentist and the office staff. They are the nicest, most considerate and professional people. I would like to call and ask the front desk to reschedule our appointments with the other hygienist and include in our files that we only want to see that one. My husband thinks we should switch dentists. To be honest, I'm shocked the dentist would tolerate this, but he is a kind individual, and maybe that's the problem. Any advice would be appreciated. -- DENTAL DRAMA IN THE EAST

DEAR DRAMA: You should have discussed this with your dentist years ago. Your concerns are valid. It is your right to be treated by another hygienist for the reasons you have stated. However, for your dentist's sake, as well as your own, tell him exactly why you felt it was necessary to make the change. It will be doing the practice a favor.

DEAR ABBY: I have been with my boyfriend, "Robert," for 10 years. We live together, and he helps me raise my preteen daughter. Recently, Robert has decided that he is "entitled to privacy." He has locked me out of his computer and phone and refuses to share his passwords.

Some history: Robert has cheated on me more than 20 times in the past, with an almost-encounter happening as recently as three months ago, thwarted only after I saw some text messages on his phone. Last week, I discovered that he used the search term "sex" on a website that's notorious for facilitating random hookups. I was furious.

Robert is now using my reaction to justify locking me out of his devices. I am finally putting my foot down and telling him this is the red line for me -- if he doesn't allow me unrestricted access to his devices, I can no longer be in a relationship with him. He is still refusing, so we are now at an impasse. Am I crazy? -- LIVID IN LAS VEGAS

DEAR LIVID: You are crazy if you stay in a relationship with someone who has not only cheated on you more than 20 times in the past, but is now hell-bent on continuing. You know what he is doing. You know he won't change. Access to his passwords isn't the answer. Enough, already!

DEAR ABBY: I'm a woman who is all for greater acceptance of LGBTQ people, but I wish strangers wouldn't assume an intimate relationship exists when it doesn't. On more than one occasion, I have been with a woman friend, and the nurse or proprietor has said something that implies we are "partners." We're not! We're just friends assisting each other or having a meal together. It's embarrassing to be identified as something we're not. There's also no comeback to correct the misidentification that wouldn't make the situation worse. My plea is that everyone be treated courteously, without making assumptions. What do you think, Abby? -- STRAIGHT, BUT NOT NARROW

DEAR STRAIGHT: I agree with your sentiments. It is presumptuous to assume that because two people of the same sex are socializing that they're a couple. However, there is an effective response to correct someone who assumes you and your friend are a gay couple. All you have to do is smile and say three magic words, preferably in unison: "We're just friends." Consider it an opportunity to educate.

DEAR ABBY: My daughter went to visit her in-laws with her husband and two children. Her mother-in-law is an amazing cook. While they were having dinner, my daughter said to her, "This is so delicious, I would love to have the recipe." Her mother-in-law replied, "My recipes are for family only." My daughter was deeply hurt, and their relationship has never been the same. What would be the best way to handle this cutting remark and help their relationship move forward? -- NOT FAMILY IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR NOT FAMILY: The best way would be for your daughter's husband to tell his mother how hurtful her response was, and for the woman to apologize to your daughter and offer her the recipe because, like it or not, her daughter-in-law IS "family."