DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a mother of two teenage daughters, ages 14 and 16, and their constant fighting is driving me insane. It seems like every day there's a new argument, whether it's about sharing clothes, using the bathroom or even the smallest things, such as who gets to sit in the front seat of the car. I've tried talking to them individually, having family meetings and setting up rules and schedules to minimize conflicts, but nothing seems to work. The tension in our home is palpable, and I worry that these constant arguments are damaging their relationship beyond repair. I’m hoping this is just a phase and one day they can work through their issues. I want them to grow up to be close sisters who support each other, but right now, that feels like an impossible dream. How can I help my daughters stop fighting and create a more peaceful and loving relationship between them? -- Teen Wars
Advertisement
DEAR TEEN WARS: Do you have two relatives or friends who might be able to take your girls -- separately -- for a few weeks this summer? Or can you enroll them in two different summer programs? They need time away from each other where they can discover themselves independently. Even better, if they grow to miss each other, that may spark kindness when they return.
Find out, too, if you can enroll them in different schools. Being separated should serve as a balm as they grow up, at least for a certain period of time.