DEAR HARRIETTE: My 20-year-old daughter recently got her cosmetology license and has started working at a salon. She’s excited about her new job and the independence it brings, but now she’s telling me she wants to move out and get her own apartment. She says she’s ready for the next step and wants her own space to feel more "grown-up." The problem is, I’m not convinced she’s fully prepared for everything that comes with living on her own.

While she’s making decent money, she hasn’t been at her job long, and she hasn’t saved up much yet. I worry she’s underestimating the expenses involved and may struggle to keep up with bills, rent and other unexpected costs. Plus, I’m concerned that, with the way the job market is, she might need more of a financial cushion if anything were to go wrong. I know part of me just isn’t ready to let go, but I’m genuinely concerned that she’s moving too quickly. I want to support her dreams, but I don’t want her to jump into something she might not be ready for. How can I help her see the bigger picture without discouraging her or coming across as overly protective? -- Next Steps

DEAR NEXT STEPS: Do not discourage your daughter. Instead, encourage her to make a budget for the year and map out her expenses and potential income. If she wants to go out on her own, support her. Let her know what you are willing and able to contribute if she needs help. Be clear and specific so she doesn’t attempt to rely on you more than is realistic. Let her know she can come home if things don’t work out -- no questions asked.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been thinking about leaving my husband, but I don’t think I can afford to be on my own. Our lives and expenses are completely entangled -- even though we have been estranged for a long time. My girlfriend suggested I just stay and build a separate life, but I feel uncomfortable about that. I am afraid of what to do next. Whenever I try to talk to him about our problems, he yells at me and says it’s all my fault. He refuses to get therapy, too. What do I do next when I am scared to do anything? -- Paralyzed

DEAR PARALYZED: Get yourself a therapist -- someone with whom you can talk through your issues to get a professional, unbiased opinion and guidance. You may also want to talk to a financial adviser to figure out a way forward with the financial resources that you do have. Finally, consult with an attorney who can inform you of the laws of your state regarding division of resources upon divorce. All of this information will help you to determine next steps. Do know that even when there are no financial concerns, extricating yourself from a marriage can be difficult. Give yourself time to figure it out.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I know that gadgets are relevant today, but they can be harmful to our health, especially for our kids. I am trying to figure out how to balance this by giving my 4-year-old daughter just one hour of screen time each day. However, she sometimes exceeds this limit because I get busy and don't monitor her usage as closely as I should.

Recently, my daughter had a tantrum when I took away her tablet. To create a healthier balance for her, could I establish a consistent daily routine that includes set times for screen use, alongside engaging nonscreen activities like outdoor play or crafts? What other strategies would you suggest to limit screen time effectively? -- Digital Distractions

DEAR DIGITAL DISTRACTIONS: It takes discipline on your side to enforce healthy screen use for your child. The good news is that you can engage the device to support you. Many smart devices have built-in controls that can limit the amount of time they are operable, regardless of whether you are watching your daughter. You can tell your daughter that she has 30 minutes or an hour to play on the device, after which it will automatically shut off. If she sees that the device stops working without your intervention, it may be harder for her to keep up her tantrum as you do not seem to be directly controlling it.

More important, let her know that there are times to use the devices and times when she has to do something else. Keep games, books and other engaging materials handy so that she always has something to do. Know that there are quite a few apps that can help you to manage your child’s screen time, including bark.us and quostodio.com. There are also printouts that you can post to help you and your child manage her screen time together.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My friend “Rica” and I both love the same man. She has known him since high school, so they have a history together. I can see he has feelings for Rica, and I believe she’s only pretending not to like him because of me. It’s painful watching the two of them hold back, knowing they might be happier if I stepped aside, yet I can't deny my own feelings for him -- they run deep. I wonder if holding on to him is selfish, or if my love could mean something to him, too. Should I let them be together, or should I fight for my love for him? -- Bittersweet Dilemma

DEAR BITTERSWEET DILEMMA: Why not talk directly to the man? Be upfront with him about your feelings and your observations. Tell him that you believe there could be a future for the two of you, but it is obvious that Rica cares deeply for him, too. Ask him what he wants. Be clear that you are not willing to share, but you are willing to step aside if he chooses her. Make your decision after you check in with him.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and my son is about to leave for his mission to Argentina for the next two years. While I am proud of him and his decision to serve, the thought of him being so far away for so long is really hard for me. We’ve always been close, and I’ve watched him grow into such a compassionate, thoughtful young man. The idea of not having him around and having minimal contact with him, especially knowing he’ll be facing new challenges in a foreign country, fills me with a mixture of pride, worry and sadness.

I want to be supportive and show him how much I believe in him, but I can’t shake this overwhelming sense of loss. I know this is a big part of our faith and many families go through this, but that doesn’t make it any easier. I’m worried about how I’ll cope with his absence and how to fill the void that he’ll be leaving. How can I find peace with him leaving and stay strong for both of us? -- On Mission

DEAR ON MISSION: Surround yourself with other parents whose children are on mission. Find solace in talking to them about your hopes, dreams and worries. It is natural for you to feel some anxiety about your child going so far away for so long, especially since you two are so close. The good news is that you know he is in good hands. He will not be alone. He will receive guidance from the leadership there.

You can stay in touch, albeit not the ways in which we have grown comfortable in this cellphone age. Figure out the frequency with which you two can communicate. Are you allowed to speak by phone or text? Can you begin a letter-writing relationship? That could be beautiful for now and as memories in the future.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend and I once dreamed of having a baby together someday. When I found out I was pregnant, we immediately went to the hospital to confirm it. My boyfriend and I were so happy with the news that I thought this would make our relationship grow stronger, but the exact opposite happened.

He became distant and irritable, arguing with me constantly and stressing me out, unable or unwilling to understand the changes I was going through because of my pregnancy. Then something terrible happened: I had a miscarriage. He blamed me for the loss, and without any compassion, he left me completely alone in my grief. What should I do? Should I find him, or should I stay away because it’s already a toxic relationship? -- Broken Bonds

DEAR BROKEN BONDS: It seems that both of you struggled through the pregnancy and the aftermath of the miscarriage for different reasons. Your boyfriend clearly does not know how to process his feelings, including the grief of losing a child. While you may not want to reunite with him, it could be valuable to have a conversation where each of you shares what you have been experiencing.

Reach out to him directly or through his friends to say you would like to talk without the expectation of reuniting. If he responds, make the effort to work through what happened and how you are dealing with it. If he does not respond, it is time for you to pivot. You cannot force anyone to deal with their life’s circumstances. Recovering from a miscarriage can be difficult. Tend to yourself and move on.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)