Q: I'm usually so busy with work that I'm not around my children that much. They're used to Dad not being home. But being "stuck" home together these past weeks has reminded me that they're really fun kids. How can I keep up the relational momentum once things get back to "normal"?

Jim: One of the key building blocks to build a strong relationship with our children involves discovering new interests and activities together -- and making memories in the process.

Trying new experiences with your child, where both of you have to rely on one another, is a good way to forge lasting bonds. If you're still stuck inside, play challenging games that require teamwork. Do web searches for online scavenger hunts or virtual tours of museums. Research something and cowrite a report about it. When in doubt, read a book together.

Once you're back outside, extend yourselves. Attend a sporting event; take a cooking class; ride horses at an equestrian center; try rock climbing... The possibilities are endless. Obviously, some kids are a little more cautious and may need a "nudge" to be more adventurous. So be sure to explore activities that fit their interests and personality. But get creative.

Whatever activities you do, there's one underlying principle that should guide you. It's crucial for the parent-child relationship to be based on unconditional love and acceptance. Kids need Mom and Dad to be their biggest cheerleaders, affirming them when they succeed and encouraging them when they fail. Love, approval and verbal affirmation are crucial ingredients to a healthy relationship. Not only will your children be more apt to step out and try new activities, but your relationship will flourish when they know you're completely with them.

So, no matter the circumstances, keep finding things you can learn together. For more ideas to help your kids thrive, see FocusOnTheFamily.com.

Q: My husband's employer shut down due to social distancing. The company may go under completely before it's all over. I think we can make it financially, but how can I help him as he grieves the loss of a treasured job?

Greg Smalley, Vice President, Family Ministries: Your goal is to show you care -- at the deepest emotional level -- how the loss is affecting your spouse. There are many facets to this, but here are just a few thoughts to keep in mind:

Your spouse needs your care before your solutions. Avoid using phrases like "at least" as a way of placing a silver lining around the loss. Saying "At least we have savings" or "At least you don't have coronavirus" won't help.

Resist the urge to problem-solve before you empathize with your spouse's pain. Problem-solving or trying to fix the problem usually leads to relationship disconnect. Hearts connect when you spend time caring and empathizing with your spouse's feelings during a loss. Sympathy is when you feel bad for your spouse: "I'm so sorry that you lost your job." Empathy is feeling bad with your spouse, connecting with his broken heart: "I can only imagine how devastated and overwhelmed you must feel right now. I don't know what to say, but we'll walk this out together."

Give your spouse a safe place to hurt in a way that's unique to him. Don't take his feelings personally. However, it's never OK for anyone to express their feelings inappropriately at your expense.

If he doesn't want to talk about the loss yet, give him space to internally process his feelings. Something like, "I would love to better understand what you're going through and how you're feeling. Let me know when you're ready to talk."

Our staff counselors would be happy to help you both; call 855-771-HELP (4357) for a free consultation.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

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Q: The past couple of months have been so hard for everyone. Beyond the immediate thought of "just get through it," I'm struggling to grasp a lesson out of this time. What's your take?

Jim: We're probably all guilty of taking our blessings for granted. So, I think the biggest challenge we face may be to live every moment focused on what truly matters. For example, each time a natural disaster occurs, I listen to the wisdom of those who survive. These good folks stand in the rubble of their lives and, almost without exception, share the same perspective about what's really important. Though they've lost everything from a material standpoint, they express deep gratitude that their loved ones are safe.

That type of reaction makes sense. After all, tragedy has a unique way of bringing clarity into our lives. But I'm troubled that it often takes a crisis for us to see clearly. We get distracted, and family priorities soon begin to erode. For example, studies have shown that on average, fathers spend less than 60 seconds in daily conversation with each of their children!

Our culture constantly offers a skewed idea of what's valuable, and we buy into that hype far too easily. Parents work longer and harder in a never-ending quest for bigger houses, newer cars and the latest technology. Eventually, the "stuff" of life overshadows what really matters, while time with our family dwindles away.

When crisis rocks our lives at a foundational level, we need something to comfort us that goes even deeper. There are only two things in life that we can count on to do that -- the love and support of family and friends, and, most importantly, the bedrock of faith. Nothing besides love and an eternal perspective can reach into our suffering and bring us true comfort.

Q: No matter where we have turned these past weeks -- TV, internet, social media -- it's just nonstop bad news all the time. I'm concerned about how such things impact my kids. Do you have any advice?

Danny Huerta, Executive Director, Parenting & Youth: This world can be a scary place. Even "normally," media is constantly filled with bad news -- from acts of violence to natural disasters to (now) a pandemic. It's tough enough to deal with these tragedies as adults, let alone talk to our children about them.

While parents shouldn't draw attention to every troubling event in the news, some are so widely publicized they can't be avoided. In those circumstances, it's a good idea to proactively talk to your kids using age-appropriate language. In as simple terms as possible, explain that hurt and pain are parts of our world. But strongly reassure them that you'll always do everything in your power to protect them. Remind them that dedicated people (first responders, medical professionals, law enforcement, military) stand ready to help us. Most of all, model faith and hope in God.

Keep in mind, too, that physical touch is an important part of these conversations. When children are feeling uncertain, a parent's hug can go a long way toward calming their fears.

It's important to invite your kids to share what's on their heart as well. Allow them to question or comment, but don't overload them with information. Be sure to limit exposure to ongoing coverage, particularly graphic video images. Finally, remember that various personality types and ages handle such events differently. Many children want to know how it all applies to their own lives, if they are safe and what they can do to help.

Helping kids navigate troubling news isn't easy, but caring, faithful parents can be a key source of strength, comfort and security. For more, see FocusOnTheFamily.com.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

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Q: Do you have any advice for an older couple who have long-term custody of their grandchildren? Our two young grandkids are living with us and probably will be for some time.

Jim: First, I commend you and thank you for having the courage to assume the responsibility of giving your grandchildren a loving, stable and family-centered home life. I can only scratch the surface here of what your question deserves, but here are a few thoughts.

You've likely already recognized that raising kids can be a very different proposition when it's tackled for the second time in midlife. Your energy levels aren't what they were back in your 20s and 30s, and you might even be dealing with health issues of your own. So, remember that if you don't take care of yourselves, you won't be in any condition to take care of the kids.

You'll need a strong support system. Don't let the renewed demands of parenting cut you off from existing friends, neighbors or family members who understand what you're facing and can come alongside you. Admit your limits and seek some outside help. One way to do this is to join a support group through church, social club or even local government programs.

Never feel guilty about getting away for a break. Taking some time off for yourself is not a sign of weakness, and it will help you (and the children) more than you may realize. Hire a sitter, and/or swap out caregiving with another family. Take advantage of day-care centers, summer camps, church youth groups, after-school clubs, sports programs, etc.

Finally, I'd strongly recommend connecting with a professional counselor on a semi-regular basis. Whatever was involved in you getting custody of your grandkids, there was likely some sort of difficult or even traumatic experience. I invite you to start by calling Focus on the Family's counseling department at 1-855-771-HELP (4357).

Q: After years of being single, I looked forward to being married because I thought I would finally be happy. That's what marriage is all about, right? So why isn't it working -- why don't I feel happy about being married?

Greg Smalley, Vice President, Family Ministries: We've all heard: "...and they lived happily ever after." It's the stuff of fairy tales and the hope of every couple standing at a wedding altar. But I don't think it's wise to make happiness the primary goal of marriage. In fact, I think it's unrealistic.

Here's the problem. Happiness is a fickle emotion. It comes and goes with nearly every change of our circumstances. When good things happen, we're happy. When bad things happen, we're not. That's why there's one thing you can count on: Our spouse cannot make us happy all the time. No matter how hard they try, over the course of life, they'll disappoint us sometimes.

There's also a deeper issue to consider: Making my own happiness the primary goal for marriage shows I'm in the relationship for me -- for what I can get out of it. Simply put, seeking to gratify ourselves at the expense of our spouse will destroy a relationship.

Now, I'm not suggesting we shouldn't want to be happy in our marriage. We certainly can be happy. But that shouldn't be our primary goal. True happiness comes from a deep commitment to place the needs of our spouse above our own.

That said, in order to sacrificially serve our mate, we need to ensure we have something to give. So, seek a balance with things that recharge you and allow you to love your spouse from a store of abundance. When a husband and wife devote themselves to each other in this way, they'll truly live happily ever after.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

INTERNATIONAL COPYRIGHT SECURED. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.