DEAR ABBY: I have been a sexually active male since puberty, but I never took protection seriously. Then, two years ago, I learned that an older friend of mine had been diagnosed with HIV. His wife had it before they met. They are an average family, with the house, the kids, the dog, and church every Sunday. Just plain good people -- with HIV.

That made me sit down and think hard. No more running around for me! I'm in my early 20s -- too young to die.

I found a girlfriend who was not sexually active. She told me she had been intimate with only one person, and only one time. We dated steadily for a year and a half before we engaged in intercourse. It lasted only about 30 seconds before she said, "This isn't right -- we should be married!" Then she put her clothes back on.

About a month later I noticed a bump on my penis, then two bumps, then three. I went to the clinic for medical treatment, and was tested for HIV and all the other sexually transmitted diseases, and was given treatment for genital warts. It was a very painful procedure where acid was applied to the affected area. Over the course of a week the bumps fell off, leaving open, bleeding sores.

I was told genital warts are a serious problem. It is a virus, meaning I will have to get treatments and watch for outbreaks until my dying day. For a woman, it is worse. It hides, unexposed, with no symptoms. If left untreated it can cause cancer, leading to a hysterectomy -- or worse yet -- death!

I thought just knowing your partner was safe was enough. I thought a year and a half was long enough. I was wrong. For 30 seconds of unprotected sex, I now have the "gift" that keeps on giving.

What can you do to protect yourself in the '90s? Demand to see STD results or bring 75 cents' worth of latex (condom) into the relationship. It can be a matter of life or death. -- KEEPING MY PANTS ON IN FLORIDA

DEAR KEEPING: You have learned a sobering lesson. Thank you for speaking out.

More than 12 million cases of sexually transmitted disease are reported in the United States each year. We now lead all the other developed nations in the rate that diseases are spread through sexual contact. The cost to taxpayers for curable STDs is an estimated $10 billion annually!

According to a recent report by the Institute of Medicine at the National Academy of Sciences in Washington, D.C., the public sector spends only $1 to prevent and fight curable STDs for every $43 spent on treatment and other costs. Education is essential. STD prevention can be effective only if people are willing to change their sexual behavior by using condoms and delaying sexual activity as long as possible.

School districts could help by requiring that information regarding sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy prevention be part of an age-appropriate health education curriculum, and given every year.

According to the report, there is no evidence that condom availability, or school-based education programs to prevent STDs, promotes sexual activity.

In this case, ignorance is the enemy. And yes, I know I'll hear from readers insisting that abstinence is the only 100 percent safe sex. However, for those who are unable to remain abstinent, effective sex education is the answer.

Good advice for everyone -- teens to seniors -- is in "The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It." To order, send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: I teach fourth grade at Westlake Elementary School in Ventura County, Calif. As a fun assignment, I gave the students the beginning of a list of famous sayings and asked them to provide original endings for each one. Here are some examples of what my students submitted. You may want to share them with your readers. -- LESLY VICK

DEAR LESLY VICK: Indeed I do. Your students deserve an "A" for originality. Read on:

The grass is always greener when you leave the sprinkler on.

A rolling stone plays the guitar.

The grass is always greener when you remember to water it.

A bird in the hand is a real mess.

No news is no newspaper.

It's better to light one candle than to waste electricity.

It's always darkest just before I open my eyes.

You have nothing to fear but homework.

If you can't stand the heat, don't start the fireplace.

If you can't stand the heat, go swimming.

Never put off 'til tomorrow what you should have done yesterday.

A penny saved is nothing in the real world.

The squeaking wheel gets annoying.

We have nothing to fear but our principal.

To err is human. To eat a muskrat is not.

I think, therefore I get a headache.

Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry, and someone yells, "Shut up!"

Better to light a candle than to light an explosive.

It's always darkest before 9:30 p.m.

Early to bed and early to rise is first in the bathroom.

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a blister.

There is nothing new under the bed.

The grass is always greener when you put manure on it.

Don't count your chickens -- it takes too long!

DEAR ABBY: In reference to "Happily Adopted in Orlando, Fla." This indeed was a remarkable letter.

It is well-organized, well-punctuated and quite correct in every respect. A parse program I have rates it at the eighth- or ninth-grade level. No small achievement for the sixth-grade product of an educational system that for years has been unable to teach young people to tie their shoelaces. -- HAL D. WHITE, IMPRESSED IN UTAH

DEAR MR. WHITE: I'm printing your letter with the hope that "Happily Adopted" will see it and appreciate the compliment. And hats off to "Happily Adopted's" very effective teachers, who seem to have performed their jobs well.

However, not all my readers took "Happily Adopted's" letter at face value. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: There is ABSOLUTELY no way that I can believe that an 11-year-old boy wrote that whiny letter. It is entirely possible that he is being hassled over having two dads, but I just don't buy that an 11-year-old is/was this articulate! I have an 11-year-old, and I've worked with fifth- and sixth-graders for years.

I think one of his "dads" wrote the letter, and the son copied it and sent it to you. Personally, Abby, I think you've been snookered. -- MELISSA IN SACRAMENTO

DEAR MELISSA: You could be right, and if I have been snookered, it wouldn't be the first time.

For an excellent guide to becoming a better conversationalist and a more attractive person, order "How to Be Popular." Send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby Popularity Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: Donating the organs of a recently deceased loved one should be decided upon well before the time when the loved one is taken by the Lord.

Less than a month ago, my wife of more than 33 years passed away quite unexpectedly from a brain aneurysm at the age of 54. We had shared with our daughter our plans for organ donations, subsequent cremation, and the distribution of our worldly assets. Since the aneurysm took my wife within a few days of the onset, we had very little time to prepare for her death.

When informed of the death by the doctor, I knew I had the duty to proceed as we had agreed, despite my grief. It helped me deal with this untimely, tragic loss.

We were informed at the time of her death that there is a 12-hour window of opportunity during which harvesting the organs is expected to have the best chances for successful transplant. All my wife's organs were used successfully for others. Being a devoted Christian, I know she is well pleased with that result.

I have a cancer condition that may prevent use of my organs, but if they can be used to help someone else, I can only hope for it to occur as I plan. We have a friend who is a kidney recipient, and his life has been mercifully extended because of the transplant.

Abby, we should admit that it is not IF, but WHEN. Every one of us will die. Preparing for our ultimate departure could take very little time when done in advance and should help our survivors in dealing with the grief that will unavoidably follow death.

Planning for disposal of our worldly assets as well as our physical being is the responsible thing to do for those we love, especially when we think of ourselves as good stewards of the resources given to us by the Lord while we are here on Earth. After all, what we should really be focusing upon is being found worthy to be accepted by the Lord after our time here is past. -- DENNIS ROHN, HOODSPORT, WASH.

DEAR MR. ROHN: I offer my sympathy on the sudden loss of your beloved wife. You have stated the issues involved in organ donation about as well as they can be presented. It takes courage and compassion to grant permission for organ donation while suffering the pain of personal loss. However, doing so literally means the difference between life and death for those who are on the waiting lists for vital organs. You and your late wife are to be commended for planning ahead and discussing a topic that many find difficult to talk about.

DEAR ABBY: Jeanne Eccher's letter about her encounter as a 10-year-old girl with former President Harry S. Truman and his kindness to her reminded me of my own encounter with a future president. It was in July 1947, and my family was touring Warner Bros. Studio.

We entered a set of "That Hagen Girl" just prior to the filming of a scene. In the booth of a mock-up drugstore soda fountain was a young Ronald Reagan and a young actress whose name I forgot long ago.

As soon as the scene was finished, Mr. Reagan bounded from the booth to where we stood. He told us about the movie and described what it was like being an actor. He signed a "call sheet" for me and was so friendly and solicitous about our enjoying ourselves, that the tour and Mr. Reagan became engraved in my memory.

Although I had voted for some of his Democratic predecessors, when Ronald Reagan ran for president, it was my pleasure to vote for the good man who had been so kind to me when I was 10. -- JAMES A. PRENTICE, M.D., AUSTIN, TEXAS

For everything you need to know about wedding planning, order "How to Have a Lovely Wedding." Send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Wedding Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)