DEAR ABBY: My husband and I are thrilled to be expecting our first child in August. A few months ago, a girlfriend, "Marie," and I were discussing names. Marie mentioned that she had always liked the name Brooke. I told her that I'd always liked it, too.

Now that I'm pregnant, my husband and I want to name our baby Brooke if it's a girl. When I told Marie, she became angry. She said the name was her idea because her deceased mother's last name was similar to Brooke -- so she should be able to use the name if she ever has another daughter.

Abby, I'm pregnant NOW. Marie has no idea when she'll be having her next baby -- if ever. We live 3,000 miles apart and have no friends in common, so it's not like there would be any confusion over who's who. Am I being unreasonable? I would appreciate your take on this. -- GOING FOR BROOKE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA

DEAR GOING FOR BROOKE: You're not being unreasonable. Your friend is being petty. Since there are no copyrights on names, name your baby whatever you choose -- and don't apologize.

DEAR ABBY: My high school graduation is right around the corner, and I have a problem with it. About eight years ago, my dad had an affair with a woman from his office. I'll call her Rosemary. As a result of that (and other stuff), my mom divorced him and moved out of state. Dad got custody and ended up marrying Rosemary about five years ago.

My problem is, Mom plans to attend my graduation. Given the fact that she despises Rosemary -- and I do, too -- I'm uncertain as to whether I want my stepmom to be there. I think it would create friction, even though Mom says she doesn't care if "that woman" shows up or not.

Personally, I'd like to ask that Rosemary not attend. Please let me know if it's my right to make the final decision for an occasion that's supposed to be "my day." -- MUDDLING THROUGH IN MINNESOTA

DEAR MUDDLING THROUGH: Yes, it is your day. However, since your mother doesn't object, for the sake of family unity your father's current wife should be given the courtesy of an invitation. Please remember that it isn't your responsibility to be a peacemaker. I hope you'll enjoy your special day. Congratulations.

DEAR ABBY: I am a 38-year-old single mother of two. There is a man at work I find attractive, and he's giving me signals that the feeling is mutual. The problem? I've made it a strict policy never to date anyone at work, at church or in my neighborhood because of problems that can occur if there's a breakup.

It's something I've never experienced firsthand, but I've seen it numerous times. When two people split up, there's often tension, hurt feelings and back-stabbing.

As interested as I am in my co-worker, I'm afraid of what could happen to our professional relationship should we become a couple and it doesn't work out. Am I being too cautious? -- TRYING TO BE SMART IN PHILLY

DEAR TRYING TO BE SMART: While it's my opinion that workplace romances (as common as they are) are a bad idea for the reasons you have mentioned, I do think that by not dating men from the neighborhood or church, you are severely limiting yourself. Social opportunities present themselves in the places you present yourself.

Good advice for everyone -- teens to seniors -- is in "The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It." To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds only) to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: Memorial Day is again upon us. Many of our citizens will enjoy a day off from work. Some will join family and friends at the beach, a picnic, a ball game or perhaps the mall. Sadly, the true meaning of this holiday, which was designated to remember and honor America's fallen, will be forgotten by many Americans.

We owe these men and women a debt of remembrance. We must make a special effort to honor their legacy on this and every Memorial Day.

This year, the White House Commission on Remembrance is asking Americans to pause on Memorial Day at 3 p.m. local time, wherever they may be, and reflect on those who have died for our freedom. To mark this year's observance, I have asked Charles Strouse, the noted composer of "Annie" and "Bye-Bye Birdie," to write a song for the National Moment of Remembrance. The song is titled "On This Day."

Parents and kids can listen to "On This Day" online and download sheet music to learn the song. The National Association for Music Education (MENC) has posted this information on its Web site: www.menc.org.

Abby, I again ask your help in encouraging your readers to join in this act of national unity in remembering our fallen on Monday, May 26. As John F. Kennedy said, "A nation reveals itself not only by the citizens it produces, but also by the citizens it honors, the citizens it remembers." -- CARMELLA LaSPADA, DIRECTOR, WHITE HOUSE COMMISSION ON REMEMBRANCE

DEAR CARMELLA: Thank you for your timely letter -- and for the reminder that Memorial Day is only a few days away.

The White House Commission on Remembrance promotes the values of Memorial Day by acts of remembrance throughout the year. Learn more about it by visiting www.remember.gov.

Readers, as the events of the last few months have reminded us all, freedom is not free; in every conflict there is a price paid in human life. I hope that on this Memorial Day, all of you will take a "moment of remembrance" out of your holiday celebration to respect the young people who gave their lives this year in the service of our country, and perhaps join me in offering up a prayer for their grieving families.

DEAR ABBY: I am an 11th-grade girl, and I need your advice on what to tell my parents when my report card comes in June. My GPA has dropped big-time since the last one, and they have both been nagging me to study harder.

My mom and dad don't understand what it's like for me at school. Keeping my grades up has become more difficult because I don't have the motivation to immerse myself in the mandatory curriculum. I have no need whatsoever for those boring academic requirements.

The one thing I'm good at is art -- drawing and painting -- and I can do that on my own. Sometimes I wonder why I need high school at all. I'd love to have a break from it. How can I clue my parents in to what I'm all about, Abby? -- FRUSTRATED TEEN IN VERMONT

DEAR FRUSTRATED TEEN: I suspect your parents are going to know what you are all about once they see your report card. Every student, at one time or another, has had the same feelings. But the smart ones accept the reality that in order to succeed and be independent, they must, at the very least, have a high school (or equivalent) diploma. The time to get it is now. So buckle down in your senior year and lift your grade point average. Art schools require well-rounded students.

For everything you need to know about wedding planning, order "How to Have a Lovely Wedding." Send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds only) to: Dear Abby, Wedding Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR Abby: This is in response to "Ready-or-Not in Texas," the 17-year-old who is contemplating tricking her boyfriend into fatherhood. Two years ago, I was the victim of such manipulation.

At the time, my girlfriend and I were both 30. We had been together just four months. She presumed such tactics would speed up our courtship and land her a husband. It backfired. Not only did she experience a painful miscarriage, but also the breakup of our relationship because of trust issues. -- CLOSE SHAVE IN WISCONSIN

DEAR CLOSE: You're right. Since she became pregnant on purpose, you were manipulated. That letter brought in hundreds of responses. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: "Ready-or-Not" needs to recognize the things she'll have to sacrifice if she gets pregnant. Does she go to parties? No more! Late nights with girlfriends? Nope! Romantic dates with her boyfriend? That's over. She'll never do anything spontaneous again.

I love kids. Then I spent a weekend baby-sitting a 3-year-old and an infant. It was then I realized that I couldn't even jump into a shower without planning it in advance. As I anxiously struggled to listen to the baby monitor over the sound of the shower, I knew I wasn't ready.

And I haven't even addressed the issue of money. Even if you have the best baby shower in the world, there are still the day-to-day expenses -- diapers, ointments, baby wipes, clothes, more diapers, food, bottles, toys, pacifiers, more diapers, and baby-proofing the house. She'll be doing all of it alone if she tries putting something over on her boyfriend. -- RENA IN L.A.

DEAR RENA: Thank you for a bracing dose of reality.

DEAR ABBY: Instead of getting pregnant, that girl should volunteer at a church day care, a hospital children's ward, a homeless shelter -- or even do some baby-sitting and earn a little money.

She didn't say it, but she may be looking for a "quick fix" to get out of a bad home life. If she has a child, she will just be replacing one bad situation with another. I had a friend who tried that. She ended up stuck at home with her baby -- no husband, no boyfriend, no future and angry parents.

I hope "Ready-or-Not" talks to someone before it's too late. -- BEEN THERE AND WAITED IN S.C.

DEAR WAITED: I, too, hope she finds someone to talk to -- her school nurse, counselor or another trusted adult.

DEAR ABBY: I had a child when I was 17. I wasn't ready and I have missed out on a lot because of it. Please urge that 17-year-old to think of her future. Children are the greatest gifts. They are little miracles. Kids are NOT something to play with that can be put away when someone is tired of being a parent and wants to go back to being young and carefree. -- AMANDA IN FLORIDA

DEAR AMANDA: You have stated it beautifully. Having a child is a decision that should be made rationally between both parties involved. It does not automatically bring a couple closer. A man who is tricked into parenthood will not only be resentful toward the person who tricked him, but also toward the child he will be obligated to support until it is an adult.

Abby shares more than 100 of her favorite recipes in two booklets: "Abby's Favorite Recipes" and "More Favorite Recipes by Dear Abby." Send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $10 (U.S. funds)

to: Dear Abby -- Cookbooklet Set, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included in price.)