DEAR ABBY: I'm 13, and my "first kiss" just broke up with me. My dad says it's just puppy love, which may be true, but I have a feeling that I need to be with him. What hurts even more is he had a new girlfriend the next day.

I have tried moving on, but I don't think I want to. I want to try to get back with him, but I don't know how. Can you help me? -- ACHING HEART IN IOWA

DEAR ACHING HEART: If your "first kiss" broke up with you and had a new girlfriend the next day, what it shows about him is that he has a short attention span. I know you would like to get him back, but the word from here is: Don't waste your time. While the end of a romance is painful, chalk it up to experience and a part of growing up. There is no growth without a little pain; and it only hurts for a little while. Trust me on that.

Now a little advice woman-to-woman: Once it's over, all the note writing, phoning or conniving will not help your cause. Accept that it's time to forget him. The longer you linger, the more foolish you will appear. So stand up straight, smile and move on. There are better days -- and better boys -- ahead.

DEAR ABBY: Would you please print this to educate your readers about something I witness every summer -- parents encouraging little kids to take native wildlife.

I watched a 6-year-old girl show off the two palm-sized baby turtles her dad had "given" her from the lake, and put them into a plastic container to take home. Abby, they were snapping turtles! Mom won't be pleased when those "pets" snap a finger.

Then there was the mom who thought it would be fun for her 7-year-old boy to play with a few frogs in their dry, dense, sun-drenched backyard. Within an hour, the amphibians had escaped and, best guess is, they died and became dehydrated, sun-dried critters or dog food.

Abby, not only is it illegal to take wildlife on a whim, but it's also selfish. At a time when we're already damaging our planet for our recreational pastimes, we need to be teaching our kids that living beings are not toys, but rather a valuable part of natural ecosystems. It's so much more fun to observe and learn from a turtle swimming free in the lake. Please urge parents to stop being so thoughtless, or they may end up with a ticket or a missing digit. -- WILDLIFE PRESERVER IN LAFAYETTE, COLO.

DEAR WILDLIFE PRESERVER: Well said. Children -- and too many adults -- act on impulse when they pick wild plants and flowers, or decide to "adopt" little feral creatures that are destined to die when taken from their natural habitat. Earth Day is April 22 -- that's Thursday -- and it offers a chance for all of us to do something positive for the planet. Many parents use it as an opportunity to bond with their children, and some schools offer credit to students who participate. (Hint, hint.)

DEAR ABBY: How do you attract single women while on a budget? -- GARY IN LONGWOOD, FLA.

DEAR GARY: Matinees cost less for admission than late shows, and if there are any museums that are not too far away, check out free museum days. A picnic in the park or a day at the beach doesn't cost a lot -- and neither do outdoor activities such as biking or hiking. You really don't have to have a lot of money to attract a nice woman. And anyone who makes you feel otherwise is someone you should run from.

Abby shares more than 100 of her favorite recipes in two booklets: "Abby's Favorite Recipes" and "More Favorite Recipes by Dear Abby." Send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $12 (U.S. funds)

DEAR ABBY: April is Sexually Transmitted Disease/Infection (STD/STI) Month. The good news is that many younger people pay attention to the education they have received and are more likely to use protection when having sex.

The troubling news is, one of the fastest-growing groups of people contracting and spreading STDs/STIs is senior citizens. Some blame medications for erectile dysfunction; others blame midlife divorces and online dating sites. The biggest factor is lack of education. When seniors were growing up, they had to think about only two STDs. Today there are many more.

Back then, the "worst" thing that could happen if you had unprotected sex was that you could get pregnant. Now, because many are past menopause, that risk factor is gone, so they don't use condoms. And the STDs and STIs rage on.

Many seniors won't talk to their doctors about their sexual activity, and -- worse -- many doctors don't bring up the subject because they feel uncomfortable or mistakenly assume older people don't engage in sexual activity. Please, Abby, urge your older readers to get tested for STDs/STIs. -- EDWARD SALKO, D.O., FORT MYERS, FLA.

DEAR DR. SALKO: I long for the days when the only things people associated April with were paying taxes and the rain that would bring May flowers. But enough about ancient history.

Readers, if you are sexually active -- and this applies to those of you from your teens to your 90s -- for your own sake as well as that of your partner, use a condom every time unless you and your partner have been tested for STDs and know with certainty that neither of you has one. Not everyone who has an STD is aware of it -- and you can't tell by looking at someone whether that person is infected.

DEAR ABBY: I work with a woman who talks to dragonflies and believes she was abducted by aliens. She's one of those people who come across as sweet and caring, but complain and gossip behind your back. I work in close proximity to her and must interact with her daily. I can't stand her, yet she relentlessly tries to "befriend" me regardless of how hard I try to make it clear I'm not interested.

Recently there was a fire in my home and our family was left with nothing. Miss "X" offered me her deceased mother's dinner set. I felt awkward accepting it, but because she told me it made her feel good to spread parts of her mother around, I accepted. Now I regret accepting it because she thinks I'm indebted to her, and she makes my life miserable trying to engage me in mindless conversations during work.

Abby, I thanked her for the dinner set at the time she gave it to me. How long do I have to pretend to like her? -- NOT INTERESTED

DEAR NOT INTERESTED: You always have to be polite and considerate, because that's common courtesy. A way to handle this would be for you to return the dinner set to Miss "X," thanking her warmly for "lending" it to you in your time of need. (I assume you have the means to buy one now.) And when she tries to engage you in personal conversations, tell her kindly but firmly that you have a lot of work to do and no time to talk.

DEAR ABBY: It saddens me when I hear women complain that men don't do their fair share around the home. When a woman says, "He didn't put the toilet seat down," I want to ask, "Did you put it back up for him?" When a woman says, "He didn't pick up his dishes," I want to ask, "Did you clean up the oil spot your car left in the garage?" When a woman says, "He left his clothes on the floor," I want to ask, "Did you dump the unpaid bills on his desk?"

I believe marriage is a personal relationship between two loving people, not an opportunity to complain to others about perceived abuses.

During the 40 years my husband and I have been married, we both worked and managed to raise three productive members of society. We have a tacit agreement. Each of us does absolutely everything possible to keep the home running smoothly, never tallying and setting up balance sheets. Out of love, each of us does whatever improves our common good, and both of us find reason for daily surprises as we receive in kind from the other. -- JO IN PHOENIX

DEAR JO: You and your husband are fortunate to have found each other, and you have obviously worked out a formula for a lasting and meaningful marriage. You should bottle it!

DEAR ABBY: My stepmother allowed me to live in one of her properties for very low rent, which was a great gift. I will soon be searching for a home to buy, and this is where I have a problem.

My stepsister, "Diana," is a real estate agent who has been hit with hard times in this economy. Naturally, my stepmom would like me to hire her daughter, but Diana is lazy, uncommitted and unfamiliar with the area in which I want to buy.

I have another agent in mind who specializes in homes in my area, who can recommend neighborhoods and show me as many houses as needed. I don't want to disappoint my stepmother if I don't hire her daughter. What should I do? -- IN A BIND IN TENNESSEE

DEAR IN A BIND: Hire the real estate agent you have in mind. And if your stepmother brings up the subject, tell her that you did so because the person is more familiar with the area in which you want to live. However, do not tell her that you consider her daughter to be lazy and uncommitted because I guarantee she will take it personally.

DEAR ABBY: My grandfather died recently, and I missed some school because I went to his funeral out of state. When people ask me where I went and I tell them, they ask if I'm going to be OK and say how sorry they are. They all act like they expect me to break down and start crying any second.

The problem is, I didn't really know my grandfather that well. He lived across the country, and the few times I got to visit him I can honestly say I didn't really like him -- if you're even allowed to say that about a grandparent.

How am I supposed to tell these people that I am not broken up about him dying, and I'm not going to burst into tears any time soon? -- NOT CRYING IN IOWA

DEAR NOT CRYING: It is not necessary to say that to anyone to whom you aren't close. All you need to say is, "Thank you for offering your sympathy. It was nice of you to do that." Then change the subject by asking the person what he or she has been doing.

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