DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been married for seven years. Since our wedding, he has had increasing health problems.

He recently told me that he planned his funeral three months ago, without saying a word to me. I am very concerned that he seems more focused on death than on life. Am I wrong to be upset? He says I am. -- WIFE IN BURLINGTON, N.J.

DEAR WIFE: I don't blame you for being concerned because husbands and wives should be able to discuss important topics with each other, and this is one of them.

When your husband has his next medical appointment, go with him so you can speak with his physician. It's possible that because of his "increasing health problems" he has become depressed, and if that's the case, his doctor should be told.

It is always helpful for spouses to accompany each other to their medical appointments in case the patient forgets to ask a question or tell the doctor something he or she needs to know.

DEAR ABBY: My 24-year-old son, "Dustin," moved out five years ago, but he expects me to keep all his childhood and college items in his old bedroom because he says he doesn't have room for them in his apartment.

I'd like to clear out his closet and dresser and use the space for things I want to store. I need more space for me.

Dustin is calling me selfish because I want to change "his" room and move my stuff in there. I say I need the space, and if he wants to keep all his stuff, he should rent a storage locker. By the way, he sleeps here maybe five nights a year at most.

How long are parents obligated to keep their grown children's keepsakes? -- WANTS MY SPACE

DEAR WANTS YOUR SPACE: You are asking an emotionally loaded question. While, rationally, five years should be long enough, clearing "his" room instead of maintaining it as a shrine may feel like abandonment to your adult child.

Give Dustin a little more time to adjust -- like six months -- and then insist that he find a place for his things. That way it will be a little less traumatic.

DEAR ABBY: During these hard times, may I tell you about my daughter? Every year at Christmas, I let our children pick one present for around $30 for themselves. They know that we don't have a lot of money and that "Santa" brings only a few presents.

My daughter chose to give her "Christmas money" to a charity so that another family can be blessed. She's only 9, and she understands there are families who are in more need than us. She truly is an angel for reminding me of that.

I went to our local food pantry and told them what my daughter wanted to do for Christmas. The director wrote her a letter of thanks and explained how many families her $30 would be helping. I'm so proud of my girl. Sometimes it takes a child to remind us how all of us should act. -- BLESSED IN ILLINOIS

DEAR BLESSED: Yes, it's true. But invariably it takes good parents to instill a spirit of empathy and generosity in their children. So some of the credit belongs to you.

DEAR ABBY: I must respond to "Always His Mom" (Sept. 26), who asked what to do with her grown son's baby teeth. She can contact the college of dentistry close to her and ask if the school would like to have the baby teeth the Tooth Fairy collected.

When I was in dental school, we used deciduous teeth (baby teeth) to study the dental anatomy of children. It's rare to have a complete set from one person, which would make these a good learning aid for students. When I was in school, the deciduous teeth were nearly smooth because of the number of students who had handled them, making them very difficult to identify. -- DOUG FROM SOLON, IOWA

DEAR DOUG: Your suggestion to contact a dental school and ask if they would be interested in using the baby teeth as learning aids is sensible. Other readers offered some "unique" ideas on the subject:

DEAR ABBY: I'd like to comment about what to do with those baby teeth. The original reasoning behind the tooth under the pillow custom was to keep witches from getting ahold of them and casting a spell on the child. The traditional disposition of those teeth was straight into the fire! -- LADAWN IN WISCONSIN

DEAR ABBY: I had a neighbor with five children. She also kept their baby teeth and was inspired to use them to make a present for her father. At the time, we were into casting things in plastic, so she bought a mold for a toilet seat and embedded all the teeth neatly into it. Her father refused to use it because he said it would be like sitting in a shark's mouth. -- CAROLE IN GILFORD, N.H.

DEAR ABBY: My son passed away. His girlfriend was pregnant and had the baby four months later. We had a DNA test done using his baby teeth, which I had saved. It proved he was the father, and the baby, our grandson, is now 10 years old.

Also, with this information, the boy was able to get Social Security benefits for survivors. It was a bit of a struggle, but well worth it. How's that for a good use for baby teeth? -- GRANDMA IN NEWBURGH, N.Y.

DEAR ABBY: As I was cleaning out my father's dresser, I found an envelope with a drawing that I had done in kindergarten and another envelope containing a tooth and a note to the Tooth Fairy written in my childish hand.

Imagine how touched I was when I found it -- knowing he had kept these things for nearly a half a century. I think putting the teeth in an envelope for "Always'" son to find later on would be a lovely thing to do. -- SISSY IN LAUSANNE, SWITZERLAND

DEAR ABBY: My favorite Tooth Fairy memory is when my 6-year-old daughter asked if she would hear the "Tooth Fairy's wings flapping" when she came to collect the tooth that had been placed under her pillow. Kids do say the darnedest things, and yes, I still have her teeth and the notes she wrote to the Tooth Fairy. -- KARIE'S MOM IN ENCINO, CALIF.

DEAR ABBY: When my daughter did a science fair project on tooth decay, I let her have the jar of saved teeth for her experiments. She did a thorough research job and a beautiful presentation, earning a blue ribbon. -- JANICE IN ROCHESTER, WASH.

DEAR ABBY: When I married, my mother-in-law gifted me with my husband's baby teeth and first curl of hair. It sounds weird, but it gave me a warm, fuzzy kick to receive them. It also was a bonding moment with my "new mom." -- KERRY IN WICHITA FALLS, TEXAS

DEAR ABBY: I have been married for 14 years to a man who had two failed marriages. I never felt insecure in my married life until I read his answers to a Yahoo Answers poll that asked, "Do you dream about the one that got away?" and, "Have you found the love of your life?"

My husband responded that he thinks about her very often, especially on her birthday and Valentine's Day. To the other question he replied he had found the love of his life, but the relationship had ended in divorce, which he admitted was his fault.

I know he was talking about his first wife. I feel so sad and insecure. Now I must deal with the fact that on Valentine's Day his thoughts are with someone else. How can I get over this? I no longer believe him when he says he loves me because I have proof that he hasn't moved on yet. I can't believe he said that even now he still thinks about her. Please help. -- SAD HEART IN SAN JOSE

DEAR SAD HEART: Your husband posted those thoughts on a public forum? Rather than feel hurt and insecure, you should be furious. How would he feel if the person answering that poll had been you? (Of course, you would have had better judgment.)

By now it should be clear to you that you did not marry a rocket scientist. You have my sympathy because his first marriage has been over for nearly two decades and he -- along with his obvious shortcomings -- are no longer her problem, but yours. However, your pain may lessen if you look at the bright side: He treats you well 363 days a year, and many of the women who write to me are not so lucky.

DEAR ABBY: I have been involved with a man in a long-distance relationship for two years. I care about him very much and I believe he cares for me.

Things were going great until he was devastated by a downturn in his business. He had planned to move here, but was unable to sell his home. We used to see each other every two weeks, but no longer. It has been almost two months. He calls once a week, but nothing else.

We have been close and he has shared his life, his worries and personal information with me. I haven't pressured him and I don't need a commitment now, although I would like one someday.

Abby, he seems to be drifting away. Is it OK to write to him, email him, send encouraging notes once a week and continue to support him? Is it too much to ask for more frequent communication from him? I have offered to travel the 1,000 miles, but he has evaded my offer. I'm not ready to walk away. We have been great together and this is difficult for me. Advice? -- HOLDING ON IN COASTAL CALIFORNIA

DEAR HOLDING ON: It's fine to be supportive, but don't overwhelm him right now. You may have to let this play out in its own time. Your friend may have retreated because he's concentrating his energy on reviving his business. He may be licking his wounds or he may have met someone, which is why he discouraged your visit. That he still calls you is encouraging.

Because you have known him for two years, I recommend you simply ask him if he's met someone else. If the answer is no, it will put your mind at ease. But if the answer is yes, at least you'll be clear about what happened.