DEAR ABBY: My wife and I have been married 14 years. During that time her mother has called every single day.

Initially, I was OK with it because we were living in Florida and she was in Iowa. However, since we moved back to Iowa to be near her (we live three miles apart), she continues to call nightly. Sometimes she'll call during dinner or during our "couple's time" after the kids are asleep. I have expressed my dissatisfaction with this, particularly because my wife and MIL see each other and talk throughout the day.

Am I out of line to ask for family/couple time during which no outside calls come in, or am I being unreasonable? This is a touchy subject, and I don't know how to resolve it to everyone's satisfaction. -- BOTHERED IN THE HAWKEYE STATE

DEAR BOTHERED: With whom is this a touchy subject? Your wife? Her mother? The two of them? Considering that your mother-in-law lives close by and that she and your wife talk during the day, they appear to be excessively dependent upon each other.

As a partner in your marriage, you have the right to a quiet family dinner and private time with your spouse. If your wife can't bring herself to get that message across to her mother, then you should set a time after which "Mama" should refrain from calling unless it's an emergency.

DEAR ABBY: After years of traveling overseas, I have finally found a wonderful way of getting rid of unwanted foreign coins the banks won't exchange. Please let your readers know they can put their leftover coins to good use by mailing them to UNICEF'S Change for Good program. -- PAT IN COLORADO

DEAR PAT: I'm glad you wrote because so many people travel outside the country during the summer months.

Readers, when travelers return from an international vacation, many are shocked to find that banks change only foreign paper currency back into U.S. money, so they are left with pockets full of coins that can't be spent. UNICEF'S Change for Good program (which is supported by some airlines) collects donated coins and uses the money to support disaster relief programs worldwide, as well as programs benefiting children in areas that include education, water and sanitation, HIV/AIDS and child protection.

Those interested in participating in this worthwhile effort should send their coins to: U.S. Fund for UNICEF, ATTN: Change for Good Program, 125 Maiden Lane, New York, N.Y. 10038.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I disagree about privacy. He believes he should have the password to my email and Facebook accounts. I have nothing to hide, but I think I'm entitled to my privacy. Can you settle this for us? -- PRIVATE IN BATTLE CREEK

DEAR PRIVATE: Probably not. Everyone is entitled to privacy, and being private doesn't necessarily mean you have something to hide. Your husband may want to look at your postings because he doesn't completely trust you. Or he may have no interests of his own. No third party can settle this tug-of-war with so little information about what else may be going on in your relationship.

TO MY READERS: Happy Fourth of July, everyone!

DEAR ABBY: My brother-in-law, "Dave," has twice kissed me passionately when my sister was not around. I made light of it and pushed him away. The third time it happened was when he came to my house to do a little repair job for me. That time he also grabbed my breast. I exploded and told him off.

Later on, Dave called and said he was going to come back to do some other things that needed attention. I told him he was not welcome in my house and that I'm furious he would do such a thing. He apologized and said he hoped I could forgive him.

I am so angry! I no longer want to be in his company. I also don't like that I have to keep his behavior a secret from my sister. I haven't told anyone, and it is keeping me up nights. Please help. -- FUMING IN FLORIDA

DEAR FUMING: Your mistake was in not setting your amorous brother-in-law straight the first time he made a pass at you. Because you didn't, he thought his advances were welcome.

Now that you have made plain to him that you're not interested, you will probably have nothing more to worry about. But you are wise not to have him over unless your sister is with him.

I don't blame you for being angry, but do nothing until you cool off. The question then will be whether to tell Sis that her husband behaves inappropriately and how you know.

DEAR ABBY: I recently moved back to my home state and in with my grandmother to get away from my abusive husband. I have also filed for divorce. I love my grandmother dearly, but when it comes to the divorce or the therapy I go to weekly, she is not understanding and constantly brings up what he did to me.

I believe she's frustrated because I'm in therapy and she doesn't see a reason for me to go. She thinks "if it's not talked about, then it never happened." I have tried to explain to her that I can't just let go of what he did to me and my son. How can I make her understand that I'm trying to heal wounds that aren't visible from the outside? -- TRYING TO HEAL ON THE INSIDE

DEAR TRYING TO HEAL: Your grandmother may come from a generation in which therapy was something to be ashamed of. A way to help her understand the importance of what you are doing would be to invite her to a session with your therapist, let her air her concerns, and let the therapist explain to her why it is important that you work this through to become healthy again. This must be very uncomfortable for you, and you have my sympathy.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a teenage girl living with my mom, who is a single parent, and my younger sister. We have struggled financially, but we mostly live a relatively comfortable life, and Mom owns her own home.

However, she constantly says things to me and my sister like, "We're so poor," or, "We're going to live under a bridge," even in public! We have asked her to stop several times, but she doesn't care that we are upset and embarrassed. How can I get her to stop? -- EMBARRASSED IN THE SOUTH

DEAR EMBARRASSED: Rather than ask her to stop, don't you think you should approach her privately and ask why she is saying it? She may be joking, but her concerns could also be a holdover from when her financial situation was less secure. Please do it. Her response might be educational.

DEAR ABBY: I'll bet you've gotten a ton of mail about "Mike in Missouri" (March 15), who was worried about his wife's declining sex drive. While your point about hormone levels is a good one, it could be something simpler than that.

I am a wife who would love to have sex more often, but I'm tired! I work full-time and do most of the household chores. I also do most of the cooking.

When my husband heads up to the bedroom at 10 o'clock and gives me that "come hither look," I'm not in the mood for sex. I'm thinking about the two loads of laundry and the sink full of dishes that still need to be done. Or I'm trying to remember whether I signed that permission slip for our daughter and making a mental note about picking up my prescriptions on the way to a client meeting in the morning.

Speaking of prescriptions, is Mike's wife perhaps on birth control pills? Those can decrease a woman's sex drive. I took a particular pill for a year before realizing how much it killed my desire. My doctor changed the prescription. Although there's a big difference, I'm still too tired to do much about it most days.

However, my husband has figured out I have more energy in the mornings, so his timing is better on those "come hither looks." Now if I could only get him to help out more with the chores ... -- G. IN DAYTON, OHIO

DEAR G.: Thank you for sharing. And you're right -- readers wasted no time flooding my office with comments on this topic:

DEAR ABBY: After conversations with women of all ages, I have concluded that more often than not, it is the husband who has caused the wife's sex drive to diminish, not hormones or other physical problems.

Ask Mike how he treats his wife on a daily basis; whether he has habits or hygiene that are off-putting; whether he indulges in pornography; whether he has taken care of his health and appearance. After 17 years, is he a good lover?

Many women are as dissatisfied with their sex lives as their complaining husbands are. Anyone who wants to have a satisfying sex partner needs to be one. -- OVER 50 AND STILL INTERESTED

DEAR ABBY: A woman's sex drive is a complex issue that in my experience has nothing to do with her hormone levels. A decline can occur at any age even though she has no obvious medical issues. The most common causes are stress, unresolved and deeply buried sexual issues, concern about body image, empty nest syndrome, distraction with family problems, worry over work or finances, and the side effects of medications such as antidepressants. -- SAN DIEGO GYNECOLOGIST

DEAR ABBY: When sex was mind-blowing for me was when I felt the most loved by my husband. The way he treats me has changed over the years, and lately I'm so turned off that I can no longer physically respond to him. Often, a woman loses interest in sex because her partner makes her feel like he has lost interest in her.

At the beginning of a relationship, both people do special things for each other to show their affection. These are the things women need. To continue feeling loved, each woman has different emotional needs that can stay the same or evolve as life's circumstances change.

The bottom line is, if men want their wives to want them physically, they need to learn what their wives want emotionally -- and then do a lot of it. Pay attention to her, communicate, make her a priority. I'm amazed that so many men don't understand how enormous the payoff would be if they made the effort to make their wives feel they are still special. -- OUTTA HERE SOON