DEAR ABBY: I am wondering why pregnant women these days don't wear smocks like we all wore years ago. While I do think pregnant women are attractive, I really don't want to see their swollen bellies. Wouldn't it be better to just "imagine" what is under that smock or long skirt? Does anyone agree with me? -- DOROTHY IN WASHINGTON

DEAR DOROTHY: Some readers may agree, but I'm pretty sure most of them won't. You are harking back to the days when people were embarrassed about the subject of sex, and used euphemisms like "in a family way" or "a bun in the oven" to describe pregnancy.

Women today are proud to show off their silhouettes. In fact, I saw a woman recently sporting a T-shirt with an arrow pointing downward and the words "Baby on Board." While this may seem to be somewhat "in your face," I think it's healthier than pretending there's nothing going on when the expectant mother is in her seventh month and it's obvious there is.

DEAR ABBY: I'm 21 and a college student. My mother recently came to visit me and took my boyfriend and me out to dinner. After we were through eating, we sat across the table from my mother and engaged in post-dinner chatter. I draped my arm around his neck and began playing with his ear. It was absent-minded, and I thought nothing of it, but my mother stared from across the table shocked.

She later told me that ear fondling is not appropriate in public. I was taken aback. Isn't it OK to play with my boyfriend's ear in public? Does it make people around us uncomfortable? -- EAR SNUGGLES IN VERMONT

DEAR EAR SNUGGLES: Playing with someone's ear could be considered foreplay, and seeing it certainly made your mother uncomfortable. Perhaps among your contemporaries it would be acceptable, but as a general rule, it's better to keep intimate gestures of affection private.

DEAR ABBY: I would like to offer a reminder so people won't have to experience what I am right now. Please take a few minutes to go through your wallet and make photocopies of everything in there. Put the list somewhere you can easily find it. That way, if your wallet is lost or stolen, you'll know what was in it.

I did that years ago, but I didn't keep it current and now I'm upset with myself. Some time over the weekend I misplaced my wallet. Luckily, I don't keep my ID and debit cards there, so at least they are safe. But because I use my wallet so seldom, I'm unsure what was in there.

If people make copies of everything in their wallets, it will be easier to report and replace the things should the need arise. I am so bummed out right now. While I lost only $30, I lost a treasured photograph of my daughter, and I can't remember what other cards may have been in there. -- FUMING IN LUTZ, FLA.

DEAR FUMING: I know from personal experience how frustrating losing a wallet can be, so thank you for wanting to remind readers how important it is to copy documents or credit cards they carry with them. It takes only a few minutes, and the peace of mind it brings is worth the effort.

DEAR ABBY: Due to various anti-drug lectures he was exposed to at school, my 13-year-old son believes that marijuana is not only illegal, but also is very bad for you. He said it is poison.

My state has recently legalized marijuana and I am at a loss about how to explain to him that pot is no longer "that bad," as people partake of it in a responsible manner going forward. Any suggestions? -- COLORADO MOM

DEAR MOM: Marijuana isn't poison, unless it was sprayed with a poisonous chemical before being harvested. The marijuana being sold to adults in the states where it is now legal has been carefully cultivated and harvested. Its use is not encouraged among teenagers, however, because research has shown it can impair brain development among young people.

Stress to your son that like alcohol, marijuana can slow reaction time and impair judgment and memory, which is why it's illegal for minors to use it. Whether it will become legal across the nation is still an open question. If it's abused the way that alcohol sometimes is, smoking weed may also be harmful because, like any smoke, it poses a risk to the lungs.

DEAR ABBY: I moved into my boyfriend's home several months ago. In the beginning, he was very attentive and we had fun together. But over the last couple of months, he has become abusive and unbearable to live with. He orders me around and double-checks to make sure I'm doing things "his way."

I feel as though there isn't room to breathe and no way out. I have lost weight, and I'm having trouble sleeping now. I have no family or friends who can help me out. I want to end this misery! But how? -- MISERABLE IN FLORIDA

DEAR MISERABLE: Pick up the phone and call the National Domestic Violence Hotline (800-799-7233). Although your boyfriend's controlling behavior hasn't yet escalated to physical abuse, it very well could. The counselors at the hotline can help you to formulate a plan so you can safely get away. Please don't wait to make the call, because the symptoms you're having are ones of extreme stress.

DEAR ABBY: We live in a small town. My husband is friendly and outgoing and seems to know everyone. We can't go anywhere without running into someone he knows. Meals out that should be quiet affairs turn into social situations I do not want to be part of.

I have wracked my brain as to a polite response to people when they say, "Join us!" I don't WANT to join them. How do we politely decline their friendly offer? -- "NOT TONIGHT" IN NORTH CAROLINA

DEAR "NOT TONIGHT": A polite way to refuse would be to say, "We'd love to do that another time, but it has been a long day and we just want to sit and be quiet." It wouldn't be considered rude unless you say it often.

If these people are friends, they should understand because not everyone is up for company all the time. It is also understandable if a couple has things they need to discuss privately.

DEAR ABBY: I have been in a relationship for two years. We gave each other our phone passwords as soon as we made it official to avoid keeping things from each other.

One night I had a sudden urge to go through his phone. I had never done it before, and when I looked at his Facebook messages, I saw he had been exchanging inappropriate pictures with someone. I was shocked and angry, and it almost ended our relationship.

He deleted and blocked this person, and I forgave him. We don't talk about it anymore. I haven't noticed any other red flags, but now, when he's asleep or goes somewhere and leaves his phone at home, just looking at it upsets me. I'll put a pillow or a blanket over it so I can "forget" it's there. I don't know if I should take another peek to make sure he's staying on the straight and narrow, or if ignorance is bliss. What do you think? -- UNSURE GUY IN TEXAS

DEAR UNSURE GUY: Ignorance ISN'T bliss. Being able to trust the man you're with is, and if it turns out you can't, it's better that you know sooner rather than later. It appears you still have some unresolved trust issues with him that need to be discussed.

Between you and me, if he was trying to conceal something, he probably wouldn't be leaving his phone exposed and vulnerable to checking.

DEAR ABBY: I'm 39 and have been married for 12 years. My wife is 35. When we first got together, my wife did not want to have kids right away. She said maybe after I graduated from college, or perhaps we could adopt. It took more time because of some surgeries, but I have graduated now and I want to start a family.

She now says she thought I was kidding when we were talking about it all those years ago, and that I knew she never wanted kids. I am at a loss. I love this woman, but I do want children, or to adopt a baby if that's not possible -- but she says she's unwilling to do either. What am I to do? -- WANTS TO BE A DAD IN CHARLOTTE, N.C.

DEAR WANTS TO BE A DAD: You either accept that you will be childless, or talk to an attorney about divorcing a woman who appears to have deceived you. How sad!

DEAR ABBY: I was engaged to my ex-girlfriend for three years. We broke up more than a year ago -- her choice. We reconciled briefly, but are now broken up for good, and she's dating someone else.

My question is about the engagement ring. It didn't bother me that she kept it until recently. Should I ask for the ring back or let it go? If you think I should ask for it, should I do it face-to-face or through some other messaging? -- MOVING ON IN KENTUCKY

DEAR MOVING ON: When your ex-girlfriend broke the engagement, she should have returned the engagement ring. That she didn't indicates she is either ignorant regarding the rules of etiquette, or that she plans to keep it regardless of what the custom is. (If it's the latter, you're fortunate to be rid of her.)

I do NOT recommend asking for the ring via text or a phone call out of the blue. Your chances might be better if you ask in person. I wish you luck!