DEAR ABBY: I'm the happily married mother of two teenage boys. The other day I overheard my older son (age 17) talking with a friend about "twerking." I have never heard of it and now I'm worried. Is twerking a drug term? Is it similar to "tripping," "getting high" or "catfishing"?

My 17-year-old is supposed to go to Princeton next year on a sports scholarship, and I'm afraid "twerking" will derail him from his charted path. Thank you for any advice you may have. -- TROUBLED MOM IN CONNECTICUT

DEAR MOM: Don't panic. "Tripping" and "getting high," as you already know, refer to altered states of consciousness as the result of using drugs. "Catfishing" is something else. It's pretending to be someone you aren't, creating a false identity on social media, usually to pursue a deceptive online romance.

The "twerking" your son was referring to is a dance move recently made famous by Miley Cyrus -- in which the dancer (usually female) gyrates in a provocative, semi-squatting position that involves thrusting hip movements.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I are not big fans of his best friend's wife. "Aracely" is extremely ill-mannered. She never says thank you, didn't even write thank-you notes for their wedding and baby showers, and when we're at a restaurant will loudly announce that the food was "disgusting."

Aracely claims our baby "cries too much." She arrived at my son's second birthday party with a hangover and so much more. She claims she doesn't observe our "Southern ways" because she comes from South America and has been in the United States for only eight years.

We keep our interactions with her limited, but do not cut her off completely because my husband values his friendship with her husband. I told my husband I'm considering giving her an etiquette book, but he said it would be rude. I disagree. I think it would nullify Aracely's argument that she doesn't understand our "Southern" manners. Do you agree that it would be rude? -- MANNERED SOUTHERN GAL

DEAR SOUTHERN GAL: Sorry, but I do agree, because the gift would be given with malicious intent, and I'm pretty sure that while Aracely lacks polish, she isn't stupid.

Her problem isn't that she doesn't understand good manners because she's from South America. I have met individuals from South America who are educated, cultured and whose manners are refined. Obviously, Aracely does not come from this kind of background.

ONLY if you could pull it off without sounding catty, the next time she hauls out the excuse for her deplorable manners, you might "offer" to buy her an etiquette book "so she can learn the ways of her adopted country" -- but don't expect her to take you up on it.

DEAR ABBY: Would it be appropriate to send my future mother-in-law a Mother's Day card? I feel it would be a nice gesture to help start the relationship between us. -- NICK IN OMAHA

DEAR NICK: I concur. In fact, I suspect it will melt her heart to know you feel that way about her, even before you marry her daughter.

DEAR ABBY: I recently went in on a gift with my friend "Ali" for our other friend, "Gena." Ali offered to purchase and wrap the gift, a nice wallet from an inexpensive store. Imagine my surprise when Ali turned up at Gena's birthday party with the wallet elaborately wrapped in expensive designer paper.

At first, I thought she had spent more of her money and upgraded our gift, but when Gena unwrapped the designer packaging to reveal the original wallet we had selected, I was taken aback. It turned out that Ali had reused the wrapping paper from a gift her husband had given her, disguising our present as something it wasn't.

Gena was clearly disappointed. Other guests who had been eyeing it looked excited at first, then confused. I felt our gift wasn't appreciated and we ended up looking cheap. I was at a loss for words. What would have been the appropriate way to handle the situation? Is this normal gift-wrapping practice, or did Ali cross the line? -- FLABBERGASTED IN FLORIDA

DEAR FLABBERGASTED: Reusing wrapping paper isn't unusual. Gena's reaction to the gift was inappropriate. Instead of letting her disappointment show, Gena should have smiled and graciously thanked you and Ali for her gift. (Remember the phrase, "It's the thought that counts"?) As for you, all you needed to say was "Happy Birthday!"

DEAR ABBY: With Mother's Day nearly upon us, would you remind your readers that stepmothers are worthy of recognition, too? If one has any regard for the feelings of his or her stepmom, PLEASE make her day by calling or visiting her and telling her how much she means to you. And I don't mean a phone call at 9 p.m.

I married my husband when his sons were in their late teens. Every Mother's Day for 14 years I have been reminded that his sons choose not to recognize me, even though our relationships are very good. (One of them is a stepfather himself.) It's a real heartbreaker, believe me. -- GIVING UP ON WAITING IN OREGON

DEAR GIVING UP ON WAITING: If you think you are the only stepmother who feels unappreciated on Mother's Day, think again. I have heard from many stepmothers who have written letters that are variations on this theme. There can be reasons for it -- the fact that you didn't raise them, fear that it would be somehow disloyal to their birth mother, unresolved relationship issues or just being preoccupied.

If you haven't discussed this with your stepsons, perhaps you should. Or better yet, your husband should. But if that doesn't solve the problem, for your own sake, stop brooding about it and direct your attention elsewhere.

DEAR ABBY: For the last few years my family has rented the same beach condo. My friend "John" and his family have joined us there on many occasions. When I asked him his vacation plans for this year, he informed me last night that he has rented the beach condo for the same weeks we have historically occupied it.

I was floored. I think a more appropriate approach would have been for him to have called me first and expressed his interest in renting it, but he should not have rented the unit if it conflicted with our vacation plans. I understand the free marketplace -- first-come, first-served -- but I can't help feeling he undercut me. -- CONFUSED IN A TENT AT THE BEACH

DEAR CONFUSED: Your feeling is 100 percent accurate. That weasel DID undercut you, and real friends don't act that way. Now that you know what he's capable of, contact the landlord and make a long-term deal in advance if you want that unit in the future.

DEAR ABBY: I am a lonely 83-year-old woman. All I want is someone to love me, preferably a handsome, wealthy man who will spoil me. I have spent my entire life making other people happy, and now all I want is some happiness back. I mean, can't an older woman get some loving, too?

I have been told I'm charming. I have the laugh of an angel, a full head of blond/gray hair and a slim figure. I would like a man (preferably in his elderly years) who is lonely and needs some company. And also someone who wants to spend his savings on me. Abby, help me find my soul mate. -- WAITING FOR "GOT-DOUGH"

DEAR WAITING: Why do I suspect this letter may have been written by a group of sorority sisters after a few drinks? However, just in case it's actually on the level, your "want ad" has now been viewed by millions of Dear Abby readers worldwide, and I'm sure we will hear from many applicants who are eager to be "The One." Let's hope none of them write from "Scam-dinavia."

DEAR ABBY: My daughter-in-law is having a baby. My mother and I told her we would have a shower for her. She registered at a local store for baby gifts, let us start planning the shower, and then informed us that she would not be opening gifts at the party. My son has sided with her. He said he didn't know her reason, but felt like it was no big deal.

Why would she act that way? We think it's peculiar. The shower has now been canceled at her request. -- MYSTIFIED IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR MYSTIFIED: Your daughter-in-law may have been trying to be considerate of any guests -- possibly members of her family -- whose gifts might not have been as expensive as those purchased or crafted by other guests. Or she may have felt self-conscious about being the center of attention.

While I agree that one of the pleasures of attending a shower is seeing the expression of joy on the mother-to-be's face as the presents are unwrapped, look at it this way: Because the shower is canceled, your problem is solved. Now forget about it.