DEAR ABBY: My wife and I have been married for 36 years and have five adult children. We have a loving, caring and mutually supportive relationship.

We recently had dinner at a restaurant, and she became very flirty and familiar with our male server, who was one-third her age and a complete stranger. She complimented him on his handsome looks, his trim waistline and his smooth and reassuring speaking style. I thought she was out of line, and on the ride home, I told her so. She became defensive and angry and said she was only kidding around with him. What's the best way to avoid this type of dust-up in the future? -- JIM IN MARYLAND

DEAR JIM: What your wife did was inappropriate. Could she have had one pre-meal cocktail too many? Because her behavior made you uncomfortable, she owes you an apology. And if this sort of thing happens again, perhaps you should request a female server if possible.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a sophomore college student who has finally settled in with a group of friends I love and really connect with. However, one girl in our group throws full-on temper tantrums where she cries, storms off or exerts negative energy to the point that it ruins the night for the rest of us. These fits of temper seem to be caused by anything and everything, and have reached a point where my friends and I feel anxious being around her. What do we do? And how do we deal with someone who cries at the tiniest of perceived "slights"? -- EXHAUSTED IN COLLEGE

DEAR EXHAUSTED: The behavior you have described isn't normal. The girl appears to be extremely fragile emotionally. Whoever is closest to her should point out to her privately that all of you are concerned that her outbursts may be a sign of depression, and suggest she talk to someone at the student health center about them.

DEAR ABBY: A dear friend and her husband were at a Broadway theater production. Because of a spinal cord injury, she uses either a walker or wheelchair. During intermission, when she went into the ladies room, the line was quite long. Not one woman offered to let her move ahead. What's the protocol? I thought each person in there should have deferred to her.

I had tickets the same night, and when I saw her in line I walked up and asked her if I could intervene to move her in faster, but she said she didn't want to bother anyone. I stayed with her and didn't speak up because I didn't want to embarrass her. I would appreciate your view on this. -- TRYING TO HELP

DEAR TRYING TO HELP: My view is that someone with an obvious disability should be offered the next available stall, and if the person uses a walker or a wheelchair, the handicap stall should be offered to her.

DEAR ABBY: After two years of dating, my boyfriend and I recently got engaged. We're in our 30s and grew up in the same town. It will be a second marriage for both of us. We were each previously married close to 10 years. I have four children; he has none.

He loves my children like they are his own, and they love him. His family was nice to me at the beginning, thinking that it wouldn't last. I know they aren't fond of the fact I have four kids, and they think he should find a woman who doesn't have any.

We have been very happy together, but when we got engaged, his family got very upset because he didn't ask them how they felt or tell them he was going to do it. I think they would have discouraged it immediately.

I feel awful because he's very close with his family. He always backs me 100 percent, but I don't want to tear them apart. I don't want him to not want to see them. He's very family oriented, and it breaks my heart that he wants all of us to be close. They aren't outright rude, but they make me feel uncomfortable, like I'm not good enough for their son/brother.

All of a sudden, his brothers/sister and their spouses have stopped talking to me. They have deleted me on social media. We have never gotten into an argument or anything, so I'm at a loss. Should I marry him? -- GETTING THE COLD SHOULDER

DEAR GETTING: This is something you and your fiance must decide together with your eyes wide open. You say his family hasn't been outright rude, but I beg to differ. Making people feel uncomfortable, giving them the silent treatment and unfriending them is rude.

These appear to be extremely controlling people. You need to decide if you can coexist with in-laws like this, and your fiance needs to decide which family is more important -- the one he will form with you and your children, or the one he was born into. He may not be able to have both. You have my sympathy.

DEAR ABBY: I am a gay male in my late 20s, finishing up my grad school program. My boyfriend is older than I am by seven years. We met in 2017, but I suffered a loss in my family and was grieving for about six months. We met again over the summer and continued our relationship from June to the present.

He just texted me about the future, saying he wants children in a year or two. I am anxious and sad because this feels like a make-or-break decision. I do want children and think I will be a good father. However, a child is a huge responsibility, and I am well aware of that. I don't know how soon I'll be ready. I don't even know what the next year will bring. What say you, Dear Abby? -- LACKS CERTAINTY IN MINNESOTA

DEAR LACKS CERTAINTY: I say you need to return your boyfriend's text and tell him exactly what you have written to me. Your feelings are honest, and your thinking is clear. Now that you know where he stands, it is important he knows where you do.

That said, I'm surprised this subject was brought up in a text and not during a one-on-one conversation because of its importance.

DEAR ABBY: Something happened at work that has me traumatized. I work at a retirement house for a convent. The nuns are sweet, kind and easy to get along with. But last week while I was using the bathroom, a nun decided to be a Peeping Tom while I was on the toilet. She laughed at me in a taunting manner saying, "I can see you!" I screamed at her to stop, but she just kept looking and laughing at me. When she finally left, I was in shock.

I reported the nun to my supervisor as soon as I could, but later in the day I was still so humiliated and upset that I ended up having an anxiety attack. I can't stop thinking about it. It left me feeling disgusted with the nun and with myself.

I want to report her to the police, but I don't want drama at work. This is my only source of income. I need my job in order to provide for my kids, but I no longer feel comfortable working in a place where there are perverted nuns who don't respect people's privacy.

What do I do? I'm confused and angry, spending my days in my home crying and contemplating whether to file a police report. Please give me some advice. -- TRAUMATIZED IN THE EAST

DEAR TRAUMATIZED: I hope you realize that the behavior the retired nun exhibited is that of a 4-year-old. She may suffer from dementia. While the woman may have had good judgment in her younger years, clearly she does not now. It may be the reason she is living in that retirement community.

I'm curious about how your supervisor reacted when you told her what happened. If you cannot move beyond the trauma, talk to the director of the home and ask for counseling so you can regain some perspective. Filing a police report may not be the way to go.

DEAR ABBY: My wife and I are getting ready to retire. We are both employed and will have continued access to health insurance through our employers in retirement. My insurance covers her even if I predecease her, unless she remarries.

My wife now says she wants to carry her own health insurance because she feels she might want to remarry sometime after my death. Her new interest about remarrying bothers me, and I feel somewhat guilty about that.

What has me depressed is the question of who she would want to be buried beside -- her new husband or me. We have been married for 38 years, and the possibility of having a final resting place without her seems very lonely and like I am being rejected. It almost feels like a divorce. These are thoughts and feelings I can neither shake off nor rationalize. Your thoughts? -- LIFE GOES ON

DEAR LIFE GOES ON: Your wife is trying to keep her options open, which, although it isn't sentimental, makes sense. There are no guarantees that if you predecease her, she will be swept off her feet, so you may be worrying needlessly. If you haven't told her how you feel, it might put your mind at ease if you do.