DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My grandmother was always in charge of our semi-annual family reunions. After she got too sick to take care of them my aunt took over and decided each one has to have a theme. Last time it was Christmas in July, because that’s when the event was held. The hotel ballroom was decorated for Christmas and there were carolers and eggnog and the whole deal. It was the most expensive and extravagant reunion the family had ever had up to that point.

This time it’s going to be at the beginning of March, so my aunt decided we’re going to have a Mardi Gras theme, which is funny since she booked a hotel in Vermont, not a state exactly known for its Mardi Gras celebrations. However, my grandmother turns 90 in March and her assisted living is in Bennington, Vermont, so at least the location makes sense.

My aunt can’t do anything simple, so she expects everyone to come prepared to dress up in costumes or at least masks like they wear in places where Mardi Gras means something, which isn’t New England. She told my mom she’s already got all these activities planned like a parade through the hotel during which we will leave beads on all the guestroom doors.

For the formal family dinner, she has asked the hotel to serve specially made traditional Mardi Gras dishes and hurricanes and come up with special music and decorations.

The price per person, not including travel expenses, is heading north of $400 per person for the two nights, and that’s just too much for a lot of us. My aunt set up a GoFundMe page, but so far nobody has contributed.

When my mom and I talked about it, we figured if it was just a nice, simple family reunion with one nice meal and time to hang out together the rest of the weekend, it would be at least half as expensive and just as good a time for everyone.

My fear is if we say we are going to go and a lot of other family members back out, as some have threatened to do because of the cost, it will just keep getting more expensive for those who end up going.

I love my grandmother and want to be with her for her birthday and see the extended family we only see every couple of years, but how do we get through to my aunt she is going way overboard on what can be a simple get-together like we used to have when my grandmother was in charge of them? --- TOO MUCH FOR ME

DEAR TOO MUCH FOR ME: Has anyone spoken to your aunt about her ambitious and expensive ideas? If not, the fault isn’t hers alone.

If enough of the family likely to attend reunions lets her know they would be happy to have a simpler event following the lines of those your grandmother planned, then perhaps you’ll be able to collectively persuade your aunt to dial things down to a more financially acceptable level. That doesn’t mean she can’t still run with her idea of a central theme, she just doesn’t have to run as far with it.

Dear Readers: Today people around the world celebrate the first of the 12 Days of Christmas, light the first of Hanukkah’s eight candles, and make preparations for tomorrow’s kick-off of Kwanzaa’s seven days of observances.

Please take advantage of this holiday season to count your blessings if all’s good in your world, and to also reach out to someone who may be in a dark, sad, frightening place. Let them know they’re not alone.

And, if you yourself are struggling, please believe there are those who care for and about you, and that the world’s a better place because you’re in it.

To you all I send best wishes for a Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, and Joyous Kwanzaa; and if you don’t observe any of the above, I sincerely hope you have much to celebrate.

Before signing off, I’d like to invite you to share some of your memories from holidays past with your fellow readers and me. I especially enjoy learning about the countless different ways these special days are observed in various cultures.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My pastor gave a sermon the beginning of this year urging everyone to make at least one New Year’s Resolution for 2024.

Perhaps stupidly, I made three. One was to lose weight (check, I lost 15 lbs., which have stayed off). The second was to work on my spiritual wellbeing (a little less successful on that one, but I’m still working on it). The third was to expand my social network in real life, not just in the virtual world.

This last one has been a failure in most respects. I did connect with a few guys from work when we put together a company disc golf club, which in turn led to my playing in more tournaments both with people from work and on my own. But I can’t say there’s been any real connections beyond a shared liking for the sport.

I have come to the end of the year and feel like I have failed in keeping almost all the promises I made to myself in January. The one about making new friends bothers me the most because I feel it’s the one I made the least progress on.

Do people actually repeat their resolutions, or is it better to go in a different direction next year? --- MIXED RESULTS

DEAR MIXED RESULTS: I’ve certainly known of cases where people give unfulfilled resolutions another go, but I’m not sure why you’re feeling as if you’ve failed.

Statistically, the vast majority of people who make resolutions break them within the first few weeks of the new year. You, on the other hand, wrote that you already met your first goal and are working on the other two, neither of which are the kinds you can achieve overnight.

Wise men and women devote decades to enhancing their spiritual lives, and your growing interest in disc golf may eventually open doors to deeper relationships with other players beyond the bonds of a shared interest.

I believe you should give yourself credit for your partial success on getting through your 2024 wish list, and I’d encourage you to continue your efforts into 2025.