DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend is 60 and has an autoimmune disease. He's dependent on oxygen and suffers a great deal. He can drive, walk and care for himself, although I assist in his care quite a bit.

I was invited to take a trip with my daughter and my sisters to London next month for a week. He doesn't want me to go and won't say why, other than he's frustrated because he can't travel abroad. (He would never want to go on a girls trip to London.) He actually told me, "If you really loved me, you wouldn't go." I responded, "If you really loved me, you would be happy for me to go with my family and enjoy the trip for a week."

I cook and clean for him every day. I am the breadwinner and pay for everything. I treat him like a king. What should I do? -- YEARNING FOR TRAVEL

DEAR YEARNING: You do plenty for your boyfriend. He is trying to guilt you into not going. With the load you have been carrying, you deserve a break. Ensure that a friend or family member of his can keep an eye on him in your absence. Then ignore his comments and go on that trip. Please!

DEAR ABBY: I have a dear old friend whose company I enjoy. She is one of those stylish women who wears a lot of perfume. I have a hunch she bathes in it, uses a lotion next, then sprays it all over. You can smell her coming from 10 feet away. She may not realize it, but everyone notices it.

How I can tell her without her feelings being hurt is the issue. I've considered pretending I'm allergic by having a sneezing fit when I'm near her. I value her friendship, which is why I've kept my mouth shut. Any advice? -- PERFUME OVERLOADED FRIEND

DEAR PERFUME: This may seem like heresy, but there are times when a little white lie is kinder than the truth. Many people DO have allergic reactions to scents, which can bring on headaches and sometimes attacks of nausea. My longtime personal trainer once told me that when people work out in the gym, the smell of their body lotion, perfume, etc. could bring on a migraine.

I don't think it would be a cardinal sin to tell your friend you have developed a "reaction" to artificial scents and ask her to refrain from using them when she's going to be with you. Either that, or see her only outdoors.

DEAR ABBY: My oldest daughter is getting married and has asked my former father-in-law to walk her down the aisle. I have been there for her her whole life. My wife and I were divorced during her senior year of high school. Should I go, stay at home, sit on the groom's side of the aisle or something else? -- FATHER OF THE BRIDE

DEAR FATHER: Have you been invited to this wedding? If the answer is yes, talk to your daughter and ask her what she plans to do about the seating arrangements. Take your cue from what she tells you. You should not be seated on the groom's side of the aisle. As the father of the bride you should be with the bride's family, and ideally, you and your ex-wife should bury the hatchet if only for one day.

DEAR ABBY: I have a person in my life who I considered to be my best friend. Before he moved out of state, we agreed we would contact each other every two weeks to stay in touch and, for a short while, we did. However, I began to realize as time passed that I was the only one making calls, and sending texts or emails.

My wife and I planned a special vacation to visit this friend. While there, my wife shared with him that after losing both my parents within a very short time, I'm not the same. She told him I had been struggling with depression and my personality had been affected. He promised he would call more often to check on me, but he never did.

In the few times that I've spoken with him since our vacation -- again, with me doing the calling -- he has never asked me how I'm doing. My wife calls him a fair-weather friend and says he is self-centered, and I should just put him out of my life. I loved my friend more than a brother. What do you think I should do? -- FRIEND FOR LIFE IN TEXAS

DEAR FRIEND: Please accept my sympathy for the losses you have experienced. Your wife may have a point in her estimation of this friend. He certainly hasn't proven himself to be emotionally supportive or willing to do any of the heavy lifting in your relationship since he moved away.

Think carefully: Could he have always been this way, and the distance has just made it obvious? If that's the case, continue to accept him for who he is and appreciate what little he is capable of giving when you talk, text, email, etc. However, if his emotional distancing is new behavior, then for your own sake, develop a better support system to help you through this difficult period.

DEAR ABBY: I frequently get together to play cards with a small group of women from my gated community. The newest member, however, never stops talking and becomes surly if she doesn't win. We all find her annoying and try to avoid playing at her table. When we gently told her the nonstop chatter and constant complaints are distracting, she told us she has no intention of changing. "Take me as I am, or don't associate with me," she has said.

Abby, since we don't want to give up the games or play behind her back, we HAVE to associate with her. In a social setting, she is more bearable and, at heart, is a good and generous person. Advice? -- ANNOYED IN FLORIDA

DEAR ANNOYED: This good and generous motor-mouthing poor sport has given you your marching orders. Do nothing behind her back. Tell her once more -- directly -- that her constant talking during the games is distracting, and that if she persists, she will no longer be welcome to join you for cards. And yes, it may end your social relationship.

TO MY READERS: For those of you who celebrate Easter, I wish you all a very meaningful and memorable day. Happy Easter, everyone. -- LOVE, ABBY

DEAR ABBY: My father, who has been a widower for 17 years, has been dating a woman on and off for 12 years, a couple years after my brother and I left for college. My brother and I have never cared for her, but we live three hours away from them in opposite directions now. We figure if he's happy, then it's none of our business. I try not to be rude, but I simply do not enjoy spending time with her.

I've been planning an out-of-state sports weekend with my dad and brother. I have been looking forward to it, because with three small kids, I have little time for these kinds of activities. I got us all tickets and hotel rooms, but my brother now has to skip it because of a family medical issue.

Dad has just hinted he may bring his girlfriend to take my brother's spot, because "she's upset and not talking to me because I didn't take her to my brother's son's birthday." I can't imagine a more excruciating weekend.

I told him plainly, "I expected this to be a 'guys' weekend." But, like always, he was cagey, and I'm terrified he is going to show up with his girlfriend. How can I impress upon him that I don't want her to use my brother's unused ticket because I do not want to spend the weekend with her? -- BAD SPORT IN OREGON

DEAR BAD SPORT: Is your dad unaware of how you feel about his lady friend? The solution to your problem would be to tell your father that while you are pleased he has found happiness with this woman, you do not enjoy her company, which is why he doesn't see more of you.

While you're at it, tell him what it is about her that you cannot tolerate. Then "remind" him that her presence would change the character of the "guys weekend," and if he plans to bring her, he will spend the weekend alone with her -- your treat -- because you, too, will change your plans.

DEAR ABBY: In seven months, my 43-year-old son will be married for the second time. Because of his fiancee's problem drinking, I am absolutely against the marriage. I hate the idea of going to the wedding. Should I go anyway, and have the most miserable day of my life? I doubt that I would be able to hide my sadness. Or should I decline, tell my son I wouldn't be a good guest to have on his happy day and wish them "all the best"? -- HESITATING IN WASHINGTON

DEAR HESITATING: I will assume that your son is aware of your concerns about his fiancee's drinking. Do not boycott this wedding. If you do, you will create a wedge between you and your daughter-in-law that could last for decades. Plaster on a smile and attend so you can wish them all the best in person. Then cross your fingers that your wish comes true.