DEAR ABBY: My wife has been away for a while caring for her ill parents. Because I was alone, I decided to experiment with wearing women's clothes and found that I really enjoyed wearing leggings. They make very comfortable pajamas. I also found that sports bras not only provide compression that feels good, but also serve a purpose because I have rather enlarged breasts. Should I hide everything and put away my leggings and bras, or should I let her in on some of my secrets? -- DRESSED UP IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR DRESSED UP: I'm not sure what other "secrets" you have been hiding, but if they involve cross-dressing, you're not the only man who has discovered he enjoys wearing women's clothes. It may surprise you to know their wives help them do it. Your reasons for wanting to wear a sports bra and leggings seem practical. I see no reason to try to hide it from your wife.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a widow. I totaled my car four months ago and asked a friend, "Stan," for the type of help my husband would have provided. Stan was great and did so much. I felt bad that he refused my offer of money, so one day I took him out to lunch.

A few weeks later, he invited me to dinner and took me to my favorite steakhouse. He and his longtime girlfriend were parting ways because she was selling her home and moving to live with her son. We started going out to eat once or twice a week.

Abby, after two months, he disappeared! I think I fell in love with him without even realizing it. Now he's gone every weekend, and I'm in so much pain. I am trying to set myself free. How could I fall in love so easily? -- WASN'T EXPECTING THAT

DEAR WASN'T EXPECTING: You were vulnerable, and Stan was there and seemed willing to step in and fill the void left by your husband's death. That's how you fell in love with someone who was, I assume, a longtime trusted friend.

Stan may have met someone, have other commitments or felt unready to make one with you. That he hasn't given you a reason for his disappearance is disappointing, but it happens. Please don't beat yourself up over this. You did nothing wrong. These disappointments are a part of life.

DEAR ABBY: I've been married to a verbally abusive woman for 49 years. To the outside world she seems perfect, but behind closed doors she's nasty. She overreacts angrily to the tiniest problem and jumps down my throat when I ask her the simplest question. She complains about my poor memory and hearing. I am 75 and in good shape except for a belly, which she often makes fun of. I have recommended couples therapy, but she refuses to go. Please help me. -- EXHAUSTED IN ARIZONA

DEAR EXHAUSTED: Therapy would be a good idea. Because your wife refuses to go, it might benefit you to talk to a mental health professional. While it won't solve her problems, it could help you get to the bottom of yours. Chief among them would be figuring out the reason you have tolerated your wife's verbal abuse for nearly half a century, and deciding what, if anything, to do about it. Please don't wait.

DEAR ABBY: I have a good, if not terribly close, relationship with my adult son and daughter. We speak every few weeks. They live some distance away. There's no drama, no negative angst between us. My husband and I will soon be celebrating our 60th wedding anniversary. Neither our son nor our daughter has acknowledged the occasion nor asked if we wish to celebrate it. I assume they are somehow unaware of this milestone.

Should I contact them about it? It's not like we're incommunicado or estranged, because we're not. This anniversary is a BIG deal to us, yet they seem unaware. I'm blaming myself somehow. Their father has been treated for cancer and is, fortunately, deemed cancer-free now. What is your advice? -- READY TO CELEBRATE IN FLORIDA

DEAR READY: Your son and daughter may be so wrapped up in themselves and their own lives that it hasn't occurred to them to volunteer to host something or ask what you and their father would like. Call them and raise the subject. They may be waiting to be told what, if anything, you have planned for the occasion. If they are not available, do not let that stop you from having the celebration the occasion deserves.

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend broke up with me. After a few weeks, I was OK with it. Then he wanted to visit me, but I was busy that day and, truth be told, I didn't want to see him. I was going to hang out with a guy friend when my ex showed up although I had told him not to. When I went out with my friend, my ex couldn't go in my house because I didn't want him there if I wasn't there. When I returned home, my ex was mad that we went out to eat and didn't get him anything. Was I supposed to buy him food if I didn't even want him there to begin with? This happened months ago and I'm still furious. -- DEE IN NEW YORK

DEAR DEE: Being furious is a waste of your time and energy. That your former boyfriend would force himself on you in spite of having been told he was unwelcome was rude and boorish. You did exactly the right thing by not allowing him to insert himself into your plans. I hope you are now rid of him. If he keeps it up, it could be considered borderline stalking.

DEAR ABBY: I recently returned from an annual girls trip with my retired teachers group. We all get along well and enjoy each other's company except for one "fly in the ointment" who refuses to leave decent tips for great restaurant service. I'm talking about $2 on a $20 tab. We all pay our own bills and tip 25% or more every time. We have mentioned the subject of tipping to her before. She says she thinks it's a "racket." Is there anything we can do? -- CHEAPSKATE'S FRIEND

DEAR FRIEND: The annual girls trip may be this woman's only splurge for the year, which may be why she's conservative when it comes to tipping. I will assume that you and the others have spoken to her about the wage scale for restaurant servers, and the fact that many of them have to share their tips with other staff. Because there's nothing you can do to change the behavior of another adult, either consider your own generous tips as balancing out her stingy ones or stop including her because she's an embarrassment.

DEAR ABBY: I went to college in France. It was my lifelong dream to move here and start my own life in this beautiful country. I succeeded. I married and had a child, but the marriage didn't work out. My son, who is now 8, has spent his whole life here. He fits in. He is popular. However, as a single working mother in a foreign land, I do not.

I have mastered the French language. I can have an intellectual conversation in French, and I even make jokes in French. I understand it's a different culture. I have had many different roles as a bilingual assistant in various sectors, such as real estate, digital transformation, architecture and interior design.

I count myself blessed to always be able to find work, but the women here just don't like me. I am blond and wear makeup, and my presence seems to threaten and anger them no matter where I go. There are always one or two nice colleagues, but there is also a mass vibe of hostility. I can't leave because I can't take my son away from his father. Advice? -- LEFT OUT IN PARIS

DEAR LEFT OUT: Please allow me to offer my sympathy. What you are experiencing is hurtful. But it happens everywhere, not just in Paris.

You wrote that wherever you are working, there are always one or two nice colleagues. Concentrate on them and the work you are assigned to do and, although it may not be easy, ignore the rudeness of the others. You are not there to socialize. Because you feel iced out socially, try to connect with other expatriates who are probably feeling the way you do. It's more productive than licking your wounds alone.

At some point, your son will be old enough to be on his own, and you may be able to relocate to a part of France (or Europe) where the people are warm and welcoming. Keep your contacts close back home, because you may be able to relocate to the States if you wish. In the meantime, stay occupied. If you do, it will give you less time to be depressed.

DEAR ABBY: When attending a wedding, do you think it's rude for the guests to post photos of the bride and groom on social media announcing the new couple before the couple have a chance to post? It would be like someone else announcing the birth of your baby. I think the couple should be the first to post any photos of themselves and announce their marriage. What do you think? -- PROPER IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR PROPER: I think you're correct. However, so many people post about the activities in which they participate, it isn't surprising that guests would enthusiastically share their joy by putting these pictures online. If the bride and groom want to keep it from happening, they should specify that they want no photos taken during the wedding or the reception (and then cross their fingers). Guests who plan to take pictures should be sure to ask the couple before posting them.