DEAR ABBY: I'm so disgusted. My husband has started walking around the house with no underwear, letting it all hang out, so to speak. Then he makes comments like, "Doesn't this look good?" I'm sickened by his behavior. I feel violated. How do I tell him to stop without hurting his male pride? -- COVERING MY EYES IN TENNESSEE

DEAR COVERING: I'm sorry you didn't mention how old your husband is and how long you two have been married, but any radical change in an older person's behavior could indicate a serious medical problem. Consider discussing this with your doctor because your exhibitionist spouse may need a medical and neurological exam to see if he has experienced a small stroke or the beginnings of dementia. If he's still a "young-un," give him the affirmation he is asking for and then ask him to cover up.

DEAR ABBY: When my husband and I first got married, I became pregnant with twins. I miscarried one of them, but the other was born healthy. Ever since he was very young, our son has mentioned that he felt like he should be a twin or he wishes he were one. My husband and I are torn about whether we should tell him he was. It may give him comfort and an understanding about why he feels this way, but it also may cause him pain and grief knowing he lost a sibling. Any advice? -- SENSITIVE MOM IN THE EAST

DEAR MOM: You didn't mention how old your son is. If he is into his teens or older, the next time he raises the subject, you and his father should tell him the truth. While he may be sad to have been unable to have a relationship with his twin, he may be glad to know his longing for twinship was related to the circumstances of his gestation and birth, and not a fantasy.

DEAR ABBY: I have a new office mate, and we are not hitting it off well. From the beginning, I tried to engage her in friendly small talk, but I get nothing back except what seems to be defensive feedback. Every time I start a conversation, I end up feeling like I offended her. I have never felt so uncomfortable with someone I've worked with, and I have been working for many decades. At this point, I now say "good morning" and tell her to have a nice night when I'm leaving. When she communicates, she uses baby talk and likes to make faces. She is so creepy. Any suggestions? -- WEIRDED OUT IN FLORIDA

DEAR WEIRDED OUT: An office is not a social club. This woman is clearly not capable of engaging in the kind of banter you are used to. Accept it. Be pleasant and businesslike, and focus on the tasks at hand. If the face-making and baby talk become more than you can tolerate, and because these behaviors distract from your work, discuss them with your supervisor or your employer.

DEAR ABBY: My longtime girlfriend has male friends who visit her during the day while I am gone for about a week each month. I know them, they are interesting people, and I'm OK with that. She now has a friend who is a faith-based healer -- something she gravitates toward.

He lives three hours away, and when he visits, he stays overnight. I met him recently. He's there now while I am two states away. He does hands-on healing with her and other people she introduces him to. He goes in the water every day of the year, and now my girlfriend does, too, usually very early in the morning. Presumably, they do this together while I am away. Maybe he goes in naked; she would consider that natural.

She told me to not worry about the overnights and the hands-on healing because "he is a man of God." I told her it doesn't make any difference. He is divorced and single. Am I being a dope to let this happen without making a strong objection? -- MYSTIFIED IN MAINE

DEAR MYSTIFIED: Because this woman is your "longtime" girlfriend, you have the right to make your feelings about the arrangement known. If you weren't comfortable with the idea of her entertaining a divorced single man overnight in your absence, you should have said so from the beginning. Whether the two of them are sexually involved is beside the point. If she cares about your feelings, she should respect them. However, if she doesn't, then it may be time for you to find another girlfriend.

DEAR ABBY: My ex-husband and I met in 2006, had a beautiful daughter in 2007, married in 2010 and divorced in 2013. He was honest with me about being a recovering addict (drugs and alcohol) when we met. Our first few years together were great. However, he fell off the wagon after the wedding and started using drugs and drinking again. It quickly spiraled out of control, and I refused to raise our young daughter in that environment.

He continued in his addictions for seven years after our divorce. He became clean and sober again in 2019, has rekindled his strained relationship with our daughter and is attempting to rekindle ours as well. We are currently co-parenting and call each other friends, but he wants more.

I have forgiven him for the past hurt and betrayals, but I can't forget the pain. I can't help but be afraid that if I let him back into my life romantically, history will repeat itself. Should I let go of the past and give him another chance, or continue to co-parent and keep him in the friend zone? -- FORGIVEN BUT NOT FORGOTTEN

DEAR FORGIVEN: I suggest you attend some meetings of Nar-Anon (nar-anon.org), an organization founded to help friends and family affected by someone else's addiction. If you do, it will give you added insight. Addicts in recovery have been known to fall off the wagon, as you well know. My question for you is, are you strong enough to go through it again should the need arise? No one else can answer that question for you.

DEAR ABBY: A decade ago, before my wife and I had children, we were deeply in love with each other. Everything was great in the bedroom and outside. After we had children, my wife did a 180. She's no longer affectionate with me at all.

We barely hold hands, we never hug, and kissing is prohibited except maybe a kiss before bed. We kiss like it's an obligation. There's no touching in our relationship. In the bedroom we used to be more physical and less restrained. I wanted her to be satisfied, without getting more specific. Now, if we are intimate, it's once a month during the summer and maybe twice a month otherwise. She won't allow me to touch parts of her body, and she's physically and emotionally remote.

When I addressed this with her, she informed me that other couples are intimate less frequently than we are. She has let her body go, and doesn't diet or even try to watch her weight, and I'm concerned for her health because she has become obese. If I try to bring these matters up, she flies into a rage. Abby, am I being selfish? -- MISSING THE CLOSENESS

DEAR MISSING: The answer to that question is no. Something has gone radically wrong with your marriage and you have been iced out. Sometimes when children come into the picture, couples "forget" how to be friends and lovers because they are so distracted, tired, etc.

You and your wife need to discuss this in the office of a licensed therapist. If she's unwilling to do that, have some sessions alone so you can find a way to get through to her or figure out whether you want to continue living in "Siberia" until your children become adults.

DEAR ABBY: Our 10-year-old granddaughter has a speech impediment, which is becoming more and more significant. It is clear this is not something she's going to outgrow. She is homeschooled and doesn't attend any sort of speech therapy. Her mom knows it exists and has mentioned the speech issue in passing.

I don't want to offend our daughter, but I also don't want to see this sweet little girl have a problem that is going to be more difficult to fix as she gets older. Is there a diplomatic way to address this? The last thing I want to do is upset our daughter, but I'm really worried about our granddaughter. Your thoughts? -- PLAINLY SPOKEN IN OREGON

DEAR PLAINLY SPOKEN: Getting your granddaughter the help she needs to overcome her speech impediment is more important than worrying about upsetting your daughter by pointing out the obvious. By all means, speak up.

DEAR ABBY: Please settle a yearly disagreement. If I offer to take the birthday girl out for lunch, I will be paying the bill. So which of us chooses the restaurant? I say I should get to choose where to host the celebration for which I'm paying. Birthday girl insists she gets to choose where I'm going to take her, since it's her birthday. -- UNSURE IN FLORIDA

DEAR UNSURE: The choice of where to take your guest should be yours, not hers. Between you and me, I think she is nervy to suggest otherwise.