DEAR ABBY: My husband loves cooking for the family. Unfortunately, he's a horrible cook. My kids hate what he prepares, so most of the food goes in the trash.

I have had many conversations with him about this, begging him not to do it and telling him if he wants to cook, he should make something for himself. His reply is always, "I'm not forcing you guys to eat my food. You are welcome to eat something else." But when we do that, he sulks and ruins everyone's day, so we end up giving in. I don't know how to get through to him about this. -- TASTES BAD IN THE EAST

DEAR TASTES BAD: You can talk till you're blue in the face, and your husband still won't get the message because he doesn't want to hear it. He doesn't care about the waste.

Of course, you and the kids could explain exactly what you don't like about what he has prepared, and offer suggestions about the seasoning, etc., which might help him. And perhaps you could all cook together from time to time.

In the future, when your children achieve independence and the family gathers, each family member may want to bring their food with them. However, while they live under your roof, they'll have to accept what their father insists on giving them.

DEAR ABBY: My son is getting married in Mexico in six months. I would like to take a special friend with me as my plus-one. My wife has dementia. It is quite severe, and she has been in a care facility for two years. She no longer recognizes anyone, including me. Would it be wrong to take my lady friend to Mexico? We haven't been intimate yet, but romance at the beach in Mexico is very possible. What do I do? -- UNCERTAIN IN IOWA

DEAR UNCERTAIN: Your son's wedding is not the time to "surprise" anyone with this lady's presence. Depending upon how large your family is and how close you all are, some people may already be aware that you're involved with someone and why. But ask your son and his fiancee if bringing her would be disruptive, and gracefully base your decision on their response. A wedding is supposed to be about the bride and groom on their special day with no distractions.

DEAR ABBY: I heard my old high school boyfriend was arrested. It made the news. I hadn't seen or heard from him in more than a decade. While I'm relieved that I dodged a bullet (I am happily married to someone else now), I feel terrible for his mom. We are still friends on social media and keep up with each other. Should I reach out to her in what must be a humiliating and concerning time, or should I keep to myself? -- HESITANT IN TEXAS

DEAR HESITANT: Because you and this woman have a relationship that extended beyond the one between you and her son, by all means reach out. Tell her you heard what happened, and that you care about her and want to be supportive. She may or may not contact you, but she'll know you care about her. Knowing someone cares could make all the difference for her.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a cross-dresser who is able to enjoy wearing women's clothes in private at home. With Halloween around the corner, I want nothing more than to be fully dressed as a woman and go outside to experience how it feels. I want to wear a nice dress, high heels, pantyhose, wig, makeup, etc.

My wife knows I enjoy dressing up and tolerates it. But she's unwilling to let me express myself out of the house or help me with the process. How can I get her to help me get dolled up and experience being a woman for one night? I feel so deprived not being able to be who I want to be. -- DRESSED AND READY

DEAR DRESSED: Halloween is the one night of the year when many people, yourself included, can decide to dress up and become who they really are (or would like to be). Because your wife won't assist you, consider visiting a makeup counter and asking one of the salespeople to help with your makeup that night. And, if nothing in your closet suits the real you, rent or buy an outfit for the occasion. You do not need anyone's "permission."

DEAR ABBY: A very good friend and neighbor sold a Taylor Swift ticket to my 15-year-old daughter for $900. I should mention, my daughter would have given her right arm for the chance to go to the show. The original ticket was purchased for $300, including fees. Initially, my friend wanted to sell it for $1,000, but she offered a "discount" because my daughter's 16th birthday was coming up.

I can appreciate the value of the hottest ticket in town and that it comes with an inflated price tag. However, from my point of view, it was merely a transaction meant for my friend to make a handsome profit off of my kid. I'm extremely disappointed at the price gouging, and now I think of the woman differently. I have been avoiding her because she will likely become defensive. Am I wrong in thinking her actions were not that of a good friend after all? -- FEELING SWINDLED IN THE WEST

DEAR FEELING SWINDLED: Because your neighbor sold the ticket to your daughter at three times what she paid for it, I would have to agree; she acted more like a ticket broker than a good friend. I see no reason why you should cut her off completely, but now you know she's a shark when it comes to "business," so keep your eyes open. On the upside, your daughter got to live her dream that night, and many of the fans who saw Taylor Swift in action have said it was the best show of their lives.

DEAR ABBY: What's the best way to tell your siblings you think it's time to stop exchanging Christmas gifts? We're all in our 60s, and, frankly, I don't feel they are ever very enthused about what we get them. It just seems like it's time, anyway. -- DONE IN NEW YORK

DEAR DONE: The best way to convey that message would be verbally, so you can explain that you are all long past childhood and feel a cheery Christmas greeting would suffice. And the best time to give them the news would be well before the Christmas holidays.

DEAR ABBY: For the last six years, my partner and I have hosted family Thanksgiving dinners. I always spend more time and energy than I have to make it beautiful and successful. This year, I have neither the budget nor a desire for the stress. I made it known early that we wouldn't be hosting this year.

Surprisingly, my little sister volunteered to host, and she sent an invitation to the usual crowd. The next day, she called me to tell me that although she would host, she couldn't possibly be expected to do all that work, and she told me to bring the turkey.

She said I was free to cook it at my place or "come a bit early" to cook it there. Shocked, I told her absolutely not, because avoiding this responsibility was the reason I'm not hosting. I was planning on bringing a side or dessert as is usual for guests, but not the main dish. She got mad and said I was ruining Thanksgiving.

I feel a growing responsibility to help her out, even though I don't need the stress in my life right now, and I know once I start, I'll take control (with her encouragement). She has no idea the amount of work that goes into this meal every year, and I think it will be a mess if I don't help her cook and prepare.

Am I being selfish? Should I go early and teach her how to cook the turkey (and do everything else) for the sake of rescuing this dinner, which everyone has come to expect meets a certain standard? The thought is making me miserable, but I feel myself caving to my sister's tantrum. -- NOT FEELING THANKFUL

DEAR NOT FEELING: Tell your manipulative sister you will come to her place early and show her how to properly cook the turkey, but you won't be bringing anything other than the side dish you already plan to bring. (This may be a way to teach her some independence.) If she needs more outside help, she should contact the other guests and tell them what she wants them to bring.

You are a generous and caring sister, but enough is enough. Your Thanksgivings will be happier if you share the responsibility with other relatives. Also, remember that there are easier ways to manage holiday dinners than cooking all the food yourself. Many people buy a bird or a ham already prepared, and the same is true for the side dishes.

DEAR ABBY: Recently, my wife suggested I write my own obituary (I am almost 80) as her parents did. Because I remember dates and places she didn't know, I drafted the document. Everything in it is accurate, but I emphasized the positive and omitted the negative. Previous marriages? My wife thought mentioning them seemed like I was bragging, although it is factually accurate and the way I would like to be remembered. We haven't been able to settle our differing views. What do you think? -- ACCURATE IN THE WEST

DEAR ACCURATE: Not everyone wants to advertise the fact that they have had multiple marriages, but facts are facts. If this is how you wish to be remembered, it is YOUR obituary. You have the deciding vote, and your wife should refrain from making any more editorial comments.