DEAR ABBY: I'm having an issue with my longtime best friend. We no longer live in the same state, but we talk several times a week and try to visit every year. We both love crafting, and two years ago, I started making her a big, beautiful counted cross-stitch and had it custom framed. The project took several months, and she knew I was making it.

She offered -- I didn't ask -- to make me a quilt from T-shirts I had collected over the years from various places I had been. So I cut the logos/graphics off the shirts and mailed them to her. She told me it would take her only a week to make the quilt. That was two years ago. It has been a year since I drove six hours each way to deliver my cross-stitch gift to her, and she still hasn't made the quilt.

I have since moved even farther away. I miss home, and I really want the quilt. I have asked her about it several times. The quilt would mean so much to me, especially now that I'm more than 1,000 miles away, but she keeps making empty promises about finishing it. Meanwhile, she has found the time to create crochet and cross-stitch items for her extended family and remodel her kitchen.

I'm so hurt about the whole thing that I'd like to ask her to return the T-shirt pieces to me. At least that way I could hire someone to make me the quilt. Am I being unreasonable? -- WAITING IN THE SOUTH

DEAR WAITING: What you are considering is not only reasonable, but also rational. The next time you and your friend chat, tell her you understand what a busy person she is. Explain that you would like her to find the time to return the fabric you sent so you can make other arrangements to have the quilt made. Smile when you say it so your tone will be "warm and friendly." That way, the friendship can continue if you wish.

DEAR ABBY: At the beginning of the year, I broke up with my boyfriend. I went to a clinic to get tested for STDs, and everything turned out fine. A few months later, I started dating another guy I'd met last year. Everything was great until I realized he is HIV-positive. When I asked him, he denied it.

When I returned to the clinic to get tested again, I was told I am now HIV-positive. We had been using protection, but stopped. I haven't told my family yet, but he knows. How can I give my family this news? -- LOVED BUT CONFUSED

DEAR LOVED: Before you make any announcements to your family, schedule an appointment with your physician to discuss this diagnosis. You need to be put on antiviral medication as soon as possible. If you are still with this loser, he should be put on medication as well. Not only does his life depend on it, but he could infect many more partners.

Once you have begun the treatment your doctor prescribes, inform your family. Do not be shocked if they want you to put the person who failed to mention he is HIV-positive and then infected you in the rear-view mirror.

DEAR ABBY: I am one of nine children who all still get along. One sibling belongs to a religious order. At least one (for sure) is not a Christian. One is a born-again Christian. One of us is gay and married. We are not all of the same political persuasion. Yet somehow, after all these years, we have managed to get along and still gather for family fun, whether it's a holiday or just a cookout. We don't all live in the same state, but more often than not, most of us are there.

There's no secret to us still loving as well as liking each other. We simply respect each other's opinions and realize that although we don't always agree, it's not worth cutting out of our lives someone we have known "forever." I can't imagine losing even one sibling over a silly disagreement. That's not to say we haven't had arguments, because we have certainly had our share, but we simply take the high road and agree to disagree. I love my siblings with all my heart. Just wanted to share an uplifting note with you. -- NO PROBLEMS HERE

DEAR NO PROBLEMS: Most of the mail I receive concerns relationships that fractured because of a lack of respect for someone's feelings. Thank you for your, frankly, refreshing letter. If more people emulated your family's example, this world would be a happier, less complicated place in which to live. I wish your attitude were contagious.

DEAR ABBY: I have been dating "Paul" for several years. He lives about an hour away, and we see each other a few weekends a month. I know he loves me. A few months ago, his dog suddenly died from cancer. It was traumatic because "Bruiser" was his best friend.

Paul has been different since Bruiser's death. He has zero interest in anything physical. To me, touch is important -- not just sex. There's shared intimacy in holding someone's hand or kissing. I feel like a plant that's wilting with no sun. I know Paul is struggling, but I don't know how to help him through. We talked about it once, but other than acknowledging he's struggling, he has done nothing further.

I don't want to force the issue, but time is precious. I know what it's like to struggle with depression, and I recognize the signs, but he won't get help. How can I support him through this and get over my selfishness? -- IN THE DARK IN NEW YORK

DEAR IN THE DARK: Tell Paul you know he is hurting because since Bruiser's death, his behavior has changed. Explain that he may be depressed -- and with good reason -- and that it might help him to contact his veterinarian and ask if there are grief support groups for pet owners who have lost their furry family member. His vet may be able to suggest one or more. However, if that doesn't appeal to Paul, he should consider talking to his doctor because he is exhibiting some classic signs of depression. After that, the ball's in his court.

DEAR ABBY: I am 26 and have been with my boyfriend, "Trey," for eight years. We have an 18-month-old son. When I was six months pregnant, I went through Trey's phone and saw he was cheating on me. I was humiliated and told my best friend because I couldn't keep it in any longer. It hurt me deeply.

I chose to forgive Trey because we were starting a family and I felt I owed it to my baby to at least try. But I constantly think about the things I saw on his phone, and I don't trust him. If I even think about him going out somewhere without me, I get terribly anxious.

I'm not going to lie. I wasn't a saint throughout our relationship, but when I got pregnant, I was all about Trey and our family. I love him, but I can't seem to be happy. We are polar opposites. I'm affectionate and love my family. He's dry and doesn't care for my family or his. I also feel we resent each other. Sometimes, I want to break up with him so I can find someone I can trust and have peace with, but then I feel guilty.

Our son is a daddy's boy. He loves Trey and is always asking for Daddy when his father is out or at work. It would break my heart for my son not to see him as often as he does with us living together. My parents were never together, and I always said if I had a child, I'd make sure that child had their mom and dad together. But I'm not happy with my relationship. Please give me some advice. -- FAILING IN NEW JERSEY

DEAR FAILING: Talk to Trey. Tell him how you feel and why. Has he continued to see other women? How does he feel about the status of your relationship? How important is it to him to be front and center in his son's life?

The two of you are not married, thank heavens, so separating would not be complicated or costly from a legal perspective. Of course, he would have to support his child financially, and so would you. You both deserve to be happy, and don't be surprised if you learn that Trey feels the same way about your relationship.

DEAR ABBY: I have a daughter and two granddaughters, 16 and 24. I live with my daughter, her boyfriend and my younger granddaughter. My daughter and my oldest granddaughter got into a heated argument over the phone about something the boyfriend posted on social media. They are no longer speaking and have blocked each other's phone calls.

I feel lost. We used to all three spend one Saturday a month together, go on vacations and have family dinners on holidays. How do I get over this? -- MISSING IT IN MARYLAND

DEAR MISSING IT: A way to get past this would be to extend your social life beyond your immediate family. If you do, you will have more distraction and less time to brood about something that you cannot control. You can still see your older granddaughter separately if you wish, just not under the same circumstances as before until this blows over.