DEAR ABBY: I've been seeing "Pete" for eight months. He has been divorced for the last 15 years. He has two grown children and five grandchildren with his ex-wife, "Linda," who is still a significant person in Pete's life. They text throughout the day and enjoy doing things with Linda's husband.

Pete is having major surgery soon. He has informed me that his daughter and Linda are going to be at the hospital, and there are only two guests per patient allowed. I have tried to explain to him that I'm uncomfortable with Linda being such an important person in his life and hurt that he doesn't include me in their outings. He turns it around and asks me what I want him to do about it. He says it's my problem, not his.

I care for Pete, but I am getting fed up. Do I throw in the towel or stick it out, hoping he'll see my side of the situation? -- INSIGNIFICANT IN THE MIDWEST

DEAR INSIGNIFICANT: Because Pete thinks accepting his priorities is your problem, not his, it is unlikely he will ever accept your point of view. The problem appears to be that he doesn't consider you to be a couple, and because he doesn't, his family doesn't. You should have been included in those "outings" with Linda and her husband by now.

Nowhere in your letter did you mention any of the sweet, thoughtful, caring things Pete does for you. Because of that, and because (after eight months) he hasn't managed to create a slot on his hospital visitors list, it may, indeed, be time to throw in the towel.

DEAR ABBY: My adult daughters often ask me to watch the grandchildren. One daughter lives two hours away, the other here in my town. I don't mind weekends and days off, but the local one has now asked me to stay at her house on Sunday nights and help her with the baby in the morning.

I work full time in an extremely demanding job, which she insists is "simple." When I get up in the morning, I have to get ready for work, eat breakfast and start at 8 a.m. Her request that I stay on a Sunday night turned into me feeding the baby in the morning, so I told her it's too much on workdays. Now she's angry with me, and I am very depressed about it.

I am 68. I went back to work at the age of 60 because a change in my husband's industry cut his income severely. She can't seem to understand why this is too much for me. As for me, I can't understand why she would expect this of me on a workday. My job requires me to leave what I'm doing at times and travel immediately to handle an issue. Please advise. -- IN DEMAND IN ALABAMA

DEAR IN DEMAND: Taking care of a small child is a favor; it is not mandatory, even if the child is a grandchild. Your only mistake was in agreeing to stay over on a Sunday night rather than get a good rest in your own bed to prepare for the workweek. At your age, you must protect your health. That's why it's so important you stop allowing your daughter to make you feel guilty about putting a stop to the Sunday night sleepovers.

DEAR ABBY: My son-in-law and I had words five years ago. Two years ago, I wrote him a letter of apology and told him it was always "family first." My daughter confirmed he received the letter.

They recently had their fourth child. We haven't seen their first since he was 2 or the second since she was born, and we've seen the third only once. I don't know how to repair this situation. My daughter and I chat only when her husband is not around. She's a police officer, and I don't want to cause her any stress that could affect her on the job. He has blocked me on social media as well as my phone calls. What can I do? -- SORRY MOTHER-IN-LAW IN THE EAST

DEAR SORRY: That must have been some argument you had with your son-in-law. What took you three years to apologize? If he no longer wants anything to do with you, no one can force him, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't be able to see the children when he's not around. If you haven't already suggested this to your daughter, give it a try.

DEAR ABBY: I am a 37-year-old woman with a very supportive husband. I love him dearly, but I have some concerns. We have no children although we tried for years. Then I found out I have PCOS (polycystic ovary syndrome). I can still have a child, but now, because of my age, a bad back and a bad knee, I have kind of given up. My husband and I are overweight, though I am trying to lose weight. It's hard. I also suffer from depression. Am I doing the right thing by giving up and putting myself first? -- STRUGGLING IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR STRUGGLING: It is important to put yourself first. Before deciding whether to bring a child into this world, you need to get yourself back in shape physically and emotionally. Once that's done, you will be in a better position to decide whether you are equal to the responsibilities of motherhood.

DEAR ABBY: I have known "Mona" for 25 years and thought we were friends. She bought some patio furniture from me but still owes me $100. When I tried to contact her about it, she blocked me. I wanted to post this on Facebook without saying her name, but I'm taking the high road.

We've never had arguments, and I don't understand her behavior. Mona is the one always saying, "I love you" and "I'm praying for you," and then she pulls this? She has lied to me in the past, but I never called her on it because it didn't matter to me. What are your thoughts? -- TURNING POINT IN MICHIGAN

DEAR TURNING POINT: When you first realized that Mona was lying to you, you should have called her on it and revised your opinion of her. Mona appears to be not only a hypocrite but also a user. Be glad the lesson you have learned has cost you only $100 because it could have cost you more. As to my thoughts, I think you should stay far away from Mona and find friends who understand that friendship is reciprocal.

DEAR ABBY: I have been around "Kendra" since she was 4. I am 59 and not married to her mother, although we are good friends. Kendra is 36 now and has an 8-year-old son. She lives with her boyfriend, who is the father. They are not married. We have a great relationship.

For some reason, over the past four months, my feelings for Kendra have grown into an infatuation. I mean, I have always loved her, but now I wish I was with her. I want to be with her. My feelings are so strong, I would even marry her. I know she loves me, but I doubt in the way I love her now.

I don't want to destroy what we have, but it's killing me that I can't be with her. I have jealous feelings like a kid. I love her very much and would never do anything to hurt her. I guess I'm just a stupid old man thinking this way, but I can't help it. I can honestly say I'm in love with her. I am confused about what I need to do. -- LOVING HER IN THE EAST

DEAR LOVING: What happened four months ago that changed your feelings about Kendra from the paternal ones you have felt for the last 32 years? If you express to her the (lustful) feelings you are harboring, you will blow the entire family apart. An appropriate place to examine your feelings would be in the office of a licensed psychotherapist. Please don't wait.

DEAR ABBY: My husband, "Jake," tells his mother where we plan to go and what we plan to do on our "date nights." On several occasions, she has actually shown up. She pretends to be surprised when she sees us, asking us "what we're up to." She doesn't try to sit with us or hang around, thank goodness, but she's there, watching and listening from a short distance. She has never liked me, and I suspect this is another of her passive-aggressive ways to get under my skin.

Our date nights are an active effort to try to save our marriage. The first time she showed up, I told Jake I didn't like it and that it better not happen again. He assured me it wouldn't. I also asked him to stop telling her where we're going and what we're going to do. He hasn't done that. He says he "can't" tell his mother to leave because it's a public place, and she has every right to be there, too. What should I do? -- HAD IT IN OKLAHOMA

DEAR HAD IT: If you and Jake are serious about saving your marriage and not yet in marriage counseling, start talking with a licensed marriage and family therapist now. Jake appears to be a man who can't say no to his mother. Your MIL does have a right to patronize any restaurant she pleases, but she should not be hovering over your shoulders. A therapist may be able to help you get that message across to your husband, whose priorities appear to be skewed.

In the meantime, YOU should take charge of your date nights. Make the reservations and tell no one where you are going -- even your husband.