DEAR ABBY: My "best friend," as he has labeled our relationship, moved in with me eight months ago. He claims to have no romantic feelings for me. Despite this, he sleeps in my bed next to me and kisses me. (He claims to be asleep when he does it and says he doesn't remember it happening.) He encourages us to be sexually intimate and texts me daily "I miss you" messages when I leave town to visit my mom.

He says he doesn't want to be with me because "he doesn't see me that way." He also talks to another girl. He claims they're also just friends and have only a platonic connection, but I've seen kissy emojis, miss you texts and nude photos they've exchanged.

I feel used and asked him to leave, but he refused to acknowledge my request. When I asked him why he lives with me, he said it's because I am a better alternative to sleeping on his mom's couch next to her dog. I cannot express how painful it was to hear that.

At this point, he owes me $1,000 in unpaid rent, and I'm over feeling like I fell in love with someone who doesn't have the capacity to love even himself. How do I get this guy out of my house and out of my heart so I no longer feel like a live-in maid, concubine, bank account, chef and personal assistant in exchange for the privilege of being mistreated? -- USED IN GEORGIA

DEAR USED: How do you get this poor excuse for a man out of your heart? From the tone of your letter, you are already more than halfway there. Turn off the money spigot, quit cooking and washing his clothes for him, and when he climbs into your bed, kick him out of it and tell him if he wants sex, to get it from his other "friend." It would be money well spent for you to consult an attorney about his refusal to leave your dwelling, because it may take a formal eviction.

DEAR ABBY: My sister recently got engaged. I'm ecstatic for her. Her fiance is amazing. We have always been close, and I'm going to be her maid of honor. The problem is, since they've been dating, and especially now that they're getting married, I've been jealous. I feel like a little green monster when I see them together.

It's not about her fiance -- it's that I can't help wishing I had someone, too. It feels like a punch in the gut when they're being couple-y and I'm third-wheeling. I hate fighting these feelings when I'm truly happy for them both. But I feel jealous and then guilty for feeling this way and I'm sick of it tainting my genuine happiness. What should I do? -- DON'T LIKE THIS FEELING

DEAR DON'T: I respect your willingness to own up to your feelings. None of us is proud of feeling jealous, but most of us have experienced a twinge at one time or another. (This may be why it is included in the list of seven deadly sins.) Be glad your sister has found her soulmate, and please have faith that you will meet yours as well. It may not happen today or tomorrow, but one day when you least expect it, you will turn around, and he will be there.

DEAR ABBY: Some relatives come once or twice a year from out of state to stay at my in-laws' house. For the past 20-plus years, it has been the same routine. They show up, but we never know ahead of time when or how long they are staying. We are expected to drop everything to go over there to visit with them as long as they are in town. There are no plans and no schedule; we just sit around waiting for them to decide what they want to do.

I'm so tired of it. I would prefer knowing ahead of time so I won't have to cancel my previous plans when they show up. It's nice to chat, but I'd like to know beforehand that they are coming so I can meet them for a meal or activity rather than sit for hours. Can I make this request now that it has been going on for so long? -- BURDENED IN THE MIDWEST

DEAR BURDENED: Yes, you can make your wishes known. What you are proposing is common sense and common courtesy. Tell these relatives you love seeing them but would like some advance notice when they plan to be in town so you can adjust your schedule and take them somewhere rather than sit for hours at your in-laws'. It's entirely possible that these relatives -- and your in-laws -- would appreciate it.

DEAR ABBY: I am a widower aged 72, and I'm wondering if it would be inappropriate to contact an old girlfriend from my college days. Yes, it has been more than 50 years, and she is married with grown children. I'm just wondering what your position is on this.

It would be nice to talk and catch up on our lives, etc. She lives 400 miles from where I do, but I would like to speak with her and talk about our lives. Since we both are in our early 70s, there's obviously not a lot of time left. -- CATCHING UP IN GEORGIA

DEAR CATCHING UP: My position is don't dip your hook in the water unless you plan to keep whatever you catch. Your old girlfriend is a married woman with a family. If your motive is to simply sing a chorus of "Auld Lang Syne," go ahead and reach out. If you are lonely and there is anything more to it, then don't.

DEAR ABBY: For the past two years, my husband and I have attended a holiday concert with our good friend "Ellie," who lives two hours away. Ellie recently told a friend of hers how wonderful the concert was, and now the friend wants to come to town to see it. The problem? We do not like this person for several reasons, but Ellie has chosen to invite this friend to attend the concert with her. We feel slighted. How should we approach this with Ellie? -- OUT OF TUNE IN ARIZONA

DEAR OUT: I recommend you not do that. You may be close with Ellie, but you shouldn't try to dictate who she invites to be her guests to events. If you do, you will alienate her. Accept that if you want to attend the next concert you will have to buy your tickets separately, and when you encounter Ellie and her friend whom you abhor, be cordial.

DEAR ABBY: I recently attended a funeral for a family member. During the 90-minute service, my great-nieces and nephews (ages 3 to 6) were running around the church. Their parents said nothing and allowed them to continue.

Following the service, we were all invited to a sit-down meal in the banquet room of an upscale restaurant. Again, the children (ages 3 to 13) were allowed to run around, screaming and body-slamming each other on the dance floor in the center of the room. The noise became deafening with no regard to the older attendees. Again, the parents seemed oblivious to the noise and did nothing to stop them.

My son is being married in two months. Several of the children who attended the funeral will be in attendance at the wedding. How can I address the fact that I don't want the same performance from these kids at the wedding and reception? My husband and I are putting out a large sum of money for this event, and I don't want to leave early because of the deafening noise and embarrassment. -- DREADING IT IN COLORADO

DEAR DREADING IT: I don't blame you for not wanting anyone, regardless of age, to detract from your son's wedding. Now that you are aware of the young relatives' behavior and lack of discipline, you will have to deal with it directly. Inform the parents that this behavior will not be tolerated or welcome. When you receive pushback (and you will), all you have to do is point to what happened at the funeral and dinner afterward.

DEAR ABBY: I have recently come to realize that, even though she may not want to acknowledge it, my mother gave birth to me to replace my older brother, who was, for lack of a better way to put it, kidnapped by legal means back in the '80s using loopholes in the court system. Realizing this has made me understand why I always felt she resented me for not being him. I grew up in his shadow -- something I know she did her absolute best to not let me see, but I was perceptive enough to sense it.

Should I confront my mother, who is so far in denial that it's extremely difficult living one state away from her because it's just too close, or must I accept that there is no closure on the matter when I'm not sure that it is even possible? -- OVERSHADOWED IN NEW HAMPSHIRE

DEAR OVERSHADOWED: Regardless of how you arrived at this epiphany, have you tried talking about it with your mother, who may have no idea this has been going on in your head? You won't know whether closure on the matter is possible until you level with her about your feelings and ask if she would be willing to discuss all of this with you and a licensed family therapist. I'm crossing my fingers in the hope she can help you put it to rest.