DEAR ABBY: A longtime neighbor and friend has accused me of stealing a ring. I had been providing her with transportation to visit her husband while he was in rehab recovering from a broken leg. I also took her on other errands.

One day, she was upset. She told me she had lost a bunched-up handkerchief that held something important, but wouldn't tell me what it was. Eventually, she said she had a special ring wrapped in there, so we looked through my car several times.

I tried to help her retrace her steps and also asked when and where she may have left her pocketbook open or unattended. She then said I was the only one who had been with her pocketbook and that she was always very careful with her bag. I overlooked her subtle accusation because I knew she was distressed and frustrated.

My neighbor later came to dinner with my family, and I gave her another ride or two. Then she made a threatening hang-up call. When I went to her house (with a food gift) to address the situation, she didn't answer the door, although I am fairly certain I heard her inside. After that, I stopped replying to her phone messages asking for more rides and other assistance. I hoped she would find her misplaced item.

Today, she knocked on my front door while I was out and gave my 13-year-old daughter an angry message that she wants her ring back. My daughter was very upset, as these are neighbors we have known a long time and were always friendly with. This is extremely distressing, and I am not sure how to respond, or how to resolve this. -- INNOCENT IN COLORADO

DEAR INNOCENT: Your neighbor may have interpreted your not responding to her messages as a sign of guilt. You can reiterate that you are innocent until the cows come home, because I'm guessing her mind was pretty much made up that you were guilty after she "subtly" accused you of taking the ring. Short of taking a lie detector test to prove your innocence, I doubt there will be anything you can say to convince her. It's regrettable, but your long friendship with this woman is over. Even if she finds her ring, your relationship will never be the same.

DEAR ABBY: If you ask a guy out to dinner three times and each time he says he has already eaten, is it OK to stop trying to be a friend? I feel he could have been more honest about eating, and said something like, "Can I just get a soda or coffee? I would love to spend time with you."

Anyway, I stopped talking to him, and then he asked me why I wasn't still asking. When I told him why, he said he'd told me to take him out on his birthday. You don't want my company until it is convenient for you? Now I'm confused. I think I will look for a friend somewhere else. -- IGNORED IN THE EAST

DEAR IGNORED: When someone refuses three invitations, it means he isn't interested. Do the poor guy (and yourself) a favor -- quit trying to script your relationships and look for friendship elsewhere.

DEAR ABBY: My "best friend," as he has labeled our relationship, moved in with me eight months ago. He claims to have no romantic feelings for me. Despite this, he sleeps in my bed next to me and kisses me. (He claims to be asleep when he does it and says he doesn't remember it happening.) He encourages us to be sexually intimate and texts me daily "I miss you" messages when I leave town to visit my mom.

He says he doesn't want to be with me because "he doesn't see me that way." He also talks to another girl. He claims they're also just friends and have only a platonic connection, but I've seen kissy emojis, miss you texts and nude photos they've exchanged.

I feel used and asked him to leave, but he refused to acknowledge my request. When I asked him why he lives with me, he said it's because I am a better alternative to sleeping on his mom's couch next to her dog. I cannot express how painful it was to hear that.

At this point, he owes me $1,000 in unpaid rent, and I'm over feeling like I fell in love with someone who doesn't have the capacity to love even himself. How do I get this guy out of my house and out of my heart so I no longer feel like a live-in maid, concubine, bank account, chef and personal assistant in exchange for the privilege of being mistreated? -- USED IN GEORGIA

DEAR USED: How do you get this poor excuse for a man out of your heart? From the tone of your letter, you are already more than halfway there. Turn off the money spigot, quit cooking and washing his clothes for him, and when he climbs into your bed, kick him out of it and tell him if he wants sex, to get it from his other "friend." It would be money well spent for you to consult an attorney about his refusal to leave your dwelling, because it may take a formal eviction.

DEAR ABBY: My sister recently got engaged. I'm ecstatic for her. Her fiance is amazing. We have always been close, and I'm going to be her maid of honor. The problem is, since they've been dating, and especially now that they're getting married, I've been jealous. I feel like a little green monster when I see them together.

It's not about her fiance -- it's that I can't help wishing I had someone, too. It feels like a punch in the gut when they're being couple-y and I'm third-wheeling. I hate fighting these feelings when I'm truly happy for them both. But I feel jealous and then guilty for feeling this way and I'm sick of it tainting my genuine happiness. What should I do? -- DON'T LIKE THIS FEELING

DEAR DON'T: I respect your willingness to own up to your feelings. None of us is proud of feeling jealous, but most of us have experienced a twinge at one time or another. (This may be why it is included in the list of seven deadly sins.) Be glad your sister has found her soulmate, and please have faith that you will meet yours as well. It may not happen today or tomorrow, but one day when you least expect it, you will turn around, and he will be there.

DEAR ABBY: Some relatives come once or twice a year from out of state to stay at my in-laws' house. For the past 20-plus years, it has been the same routine. They show up, but we never know ahead of time when or how long they are staying. We are expected to drop everything to go over there to visit with them as long as they are in town. There are no plans and no schedule; we just sit around waiting for them to decide what they want to do.

I'm so tired of it. I would prefer knowing ahead of time so I won't have to cancel my previous plans when they show up. It's nice to chat, but I'd like to know beforehand that they are coming so I can meet them for a meal or activity rather than sit for hours. Can I make this request now that it has been going on for so long? -- BURDENED IN THE MIDWEST

DEAR BURDENED: Yes, you can make your wishes known. What you are proposing is common sense and common courtesy. Tell these relatives you love seeing them but would like some advance notice when they plan to be in town so you can adjust your schedule and take them somewhere rather than sit for hours at your in-laws'. It's entirely possible that these relatives -- and your in-laws -- would appreciate it.

DEAR ABBY: I am a widower aged 72, and I'm wondering if it would be inappropriate to contact an old girlfriend from my college days. Yes, it has been more than 50 years, and she is married with grown children. I'm just wondering what your position is on this.

It would be nice to talk and catch up on our lives, etc. She lives 400 miles from where I do, but I would like to speak with her and talk about our lives. Since we both are in our early 70s, there's obviously not a lot of time left. -- CATCHING UP IN GEORGIA

DEAR CATCHING UP: My position is don't dip your hook in the water unless you plan to keep whatever you catch. Your old girlfriend is a married woman with a family. If your motive is to simply sing a chorus of "Auld Lang Syne," go ahead and reach out. If you are lonely and there is anything more to it, then don't.

DEAR ABBY: For the past two years, my husband and I have attended a holiday concert with our good friend "Ellie," who lives two hours away. Ellie recently told a friend of hers how wonderful the concert was, and now the friend wants to come to town to see it. The problem? We do not like this person for several reasons, but Ellie has chosen to invite this friend to attend the concert with her. We feel slighted. How should we approach this with Ellie? -- OUT OF TUNE IN ARIZONA

DEAR OUT: I recommend you not do that. You may be close with Ellie, but you shouldn't try to dictate who she invites to be her guests to events. If you do, you will alienate her. Accept that if you want to attend the next concert you will have to buy your tickets separately, and when you encounter Ellie and her friend whom you abhor, be cordial.