DEAR ABBY: My 18-year-old stepdaughter has decided to date another female. She has dated boys in the past, but that's not the issue. We have nothing against the LGBTQ community. (My husband's brother is gay.) My issue is, should my stepdaughter spend time with her girlfriend in her bedroom with the door closed?

If this were a boy, my husband would certainly have an issue with it -- fear of sexual activity leading to getting pregnant. We are both old school about that but have embraced her new relationship. But we definitely don't want our house to be the hook-up point. It makes us uncomfortable. How should we handle this? -- OPEN DOOR IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR OPEN DOOR: Handle this the same way you would if you were writing about the young woman having a boyfriend. Tell her you are uncomfortable with sexual activity going on in your home and prefer that if she entertains her girlfriend in her bedroom, she must leave the door open.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I recently moved to a smaller town from a big city to be closer to our new grandbaby. This town is populated with a large number of older single women and, since day one, they have been drawn in droves to my husband, who is a very good-looking older man.

These women behave as if I am not even there. They move very close to us while we are shopping and flirt with him. I have had to physically insert myself between one of them and my husband on several occasions. Not only is this annoying while it's happening, but I'm having a hard time making friends. More than one female friend has developed an unhealthy crush on him, so I no longer trust other women. What do I do? -- JUST THE WIFE IN VERMONT

DEAR WIFE: You are going to have to decide to what degree you trust your husband not to stray, and concentrate your efforts on making friends with other couples. It would also be nice if your husband could remind these women that he's married and that you're right there.

DEAR ABBY: My wife went on vacation with her best friend. While they were there, they visited a nudist resort. She admitted she took off her bathing suit and went swimming. Her friend also did.

I was fuming to think she would undress in front of strangers. I feel betrayed. It makes me sick to my stomach to think she did this to me. Am I wrong to be anxious and mad about the situation? -- DRESSED IN MAINE

DEAR DRESSED: I would have to know more about the clothing optional resort your wife and her friend visited. The nudist lifestyle is not a swinging singles weekend. It is often enjoyed by entire families, and the atmosphere is healthy. Please get off the defensive and ask your wife to tell you more about her "adventure," which may have been no more than innocent fun and had nothing to do with you. You do not "own" her body, just her heart -- if you are lucky.

DEAR ABBY: A year ago, I met a wonderful man on a cruise. We hit it off fabulously, and since we live 1,000 miles apart, we stay in touch primarily by phone -- talking and video chatting. He has come to visit me four times in the past year, and we have taken two trips together. He has met my friends and neighbors and has spoken to my family on the phone (they live in a different state than I do). He says he loves me and that I'm the woman he's looked for his entire life.

The problem is, I have never been invited to visit him. When I asked why, he told me his daughters, who are in their 20s and live at home, as well as his siblings are opposed to him dating and want him to reunite with his ex. (He has been divorced for three years.) That is concerning enough, but I have never spoken to any of his friends on the phone, either.

Something smells fishy. It feels like either I'm nothing more than a "side piece," or perhaps he's ashamed of me and doesn't want me to meet or talk to anyone he knows. Or maybe he's not divorced after all. I don't want to waste precious time on something that isn't going to go anywhere. Are my expectations too great, or am I an idiot for allowing this to go on as long as I have? -- FEELING FOOLISH IN FLORIDA

DEAR FEELING FOOLISH: I don't blame you for being concerned. If, after a year of being "courted," you still haven't been introduced to this wonderful man's friends or family, something doesn't add up. Either the man is spineless, or he hasn't been upfront with you about his circumstances.

If you can't convince him to stand up for himself and make clear to his relatives that he has moved on from his divorce -- AND you can control your emotions -- pay him a surprise visit. If he has been stringing you along, he deserves to be outed.

DEAR ABBY: I grew up poor. Because of that, I spoiled my daughter rotten. I gave her everything, but it has backfired. When she turned 16, my husband and I bought her a brand-new $70,000 BMW. I told him I didn't want my daughter to be without anything like I was. She didn't want the $70,000 BMW; she wanted the $100,000 one. My husband said it was beyond his budget.

When my daughter received her car, she wasn't happy. She kicked the car and dented it because it wasn't the one she wanted. My husband took it to a body shop and paid to have it fixed. She says that when it gets out of the body shop, she is going to kick it again and then it will be even worse.

I know what you think I should do. But if I take it away and disown her, she will drop out of college, and her life will be ruined. I know that I'm 100% in the wrong. I just need help, and hopefully, you will have an answer that is different than everyone else's. Please help me with another suggestion. -- AT MY WITS' END

DEAR AT MY WITS': Gladly! When your ungrateful daughter again damages the car you so generously gave her, do not fix it. Instead, let her drive it "as is" and let her experience the consequences of what she has done. If you do, you will be giving her a gift far more valuable than the price of the vehicle. Better late than never.

DEAR ABBY: My wife and I are both in our mid-50s. Due to a medical issue she has, we rarely have sex. I don't really think about it very often anymore. Meanwhile, I have a friend, "Edie." We have been friends for a good few years now. I met her in my side job as a handyman. She's in her 80s. My wife has met Edie and calls her my "girlfriend" in a joking manner, at least I think so. From time to time, Edie would drop little sexual remarks, which, at first, I never noticed. When I recognized them, I never really thought much about them.

One day recently, Edie was having a bad day and was crying about wanting to feel alive. One thing led to another, and we wound up having sex. Now she has "awakened" and always wants to engage in sex when I see her. Until now, I never cheated on my wife in all the years we have been married, and it weighs on my mind heavily.

I love my wife and don't want to lose her or the relationship we have. I also don't want to ruin the relationship I have with Edie, if that's possible, who is just a good friend and nothing more. Edie's health is starting to get a little touchy and, per her family history, she will live only a few more years. She doesn't really have many friends or family to spend time with her.

Can I keep my wife and my friendship with Edie? Please give me some good advice as I struggle with what to do. -- GOOD HUSBAND AND FRIEND

DEAR HUSBAND/FRIEND: Wake up! I have news for you. Since you started servicing Edie, she has become something other than a "good friend," and you have become in a sense her boy toy. If you love your wife, stop the burgeoning affair now before it blows out of control and your wife finds out. If you allow this to continue, your wife will be hurt, and chances are good that your marriage will be destroyed.

DEAR ABBY: My 28-year-old son was killed by a semi in a hit-and-run. We didn't find out for weeks until he was identified by fingerprints. My husband and I were faithful members of a church congregation. Many times, I was in charge of the nursery. For three months prior to the accident, I had been keeping a child for a church member at no charge because her dad was sick with cancer.

When my son was killed, Abby, not one person sent a casserole or even called me. Of course, I didn't go to church for a couple weeks. But no one, including the preacher, reached out! Since then, I no longer attend that particular congregation. Am I expecting too much? -- SO HURT IN THE SOUTH

DEAR SO HURT: Please accept my sympathy for the tragic loss of your son. As an active member of that congregation, you expected more of a response than universal silence. More than one person dropped the ball after your tragedy, and under the circumstances, your hurt is natural. You did the right thing by changing churches, and I hope you are receiving emotional support from the new congregation you have joined.