DEAR ABBY: How do I handle an elderly aunt who has a gambling problem? I live in a town with casinos. She lives in another state four hours away. She calls me often to ask to stay with me, and if I am traveling, she asks to use my house, etc.

A year ago, she called me to help her get excluded from gambling in the state where she lives because she was out of control. She can no longer gamble where she lives, cannot afford a hotel to go to towns with a casino and sees me as her gambling getaway.

I have explained that I have a roommate, and my place is small. I have no interest in someone who spends hours at a craps table coming into my home (I'm health conscious), and I flat out cannot accommodate her as a guest. She won't give up! Is my only option to end communication with her? -- NOT BETTING ON HER

DEAR NOT BETTING: Screening her calls is one option. The other is to keep repeating your mantra that you cannot accommodate her because you have a roommate and your place is too small. Then encourage her to find another hobby. If you do, she may stop asking you and look for another enabler.

DEAR ABBY: I'm in middle school and part of a large friend group. I have one friend, "Kaleigh," who completely changed last year because of the influence of another girl. Kaleigh started saying inappropriate things and talking only about boys. She never did that before she became "best friends" with the other girl. It has ruined both of their reputations.

I can't decide if I should confront them and, if I did, what to say. I don't want either of them to be mad at me. We have had arguments before, and it ends up bad for the group when anyone gets into an argument with them. They also frequently get into arguments with each other, and somehow the whole group gets involved.

This has been going on for a year, and it has put a strain on the group. I don't know if I can handle more of this. I am not sure they will be easy to reason with if I confront them. What should I do? -- MORE DRAMA IN TENNESSEE

DEAR MORE DRAMA: You stated that you are part of a large friend group. You can't "save" or change Kaleigh, and telling her she is ruining her reputation may come across as jealousy. Rather than confront them, start concentrating on friendships with other girls in the group. One thing I have realized over the years is you can never have enough friends.

DEAR READERS: Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and no Thanksgiving would be complete without sharing the traditional prayer penned by my dear late mother:

Oh, Heavenly Father,

We thank Thee for food and remember the hungry.

We thank Thee for health and remember the sick.

We thank Thee for friends and remember the friendless.

We thank Thee for freedom and remember the enslaved.

May these remembrances stir us to service.

That Thy gifts to us may be used for others.

Amen.

Have a happy and safe celebration, everyone! -- Love, ABBY

DEAR ABBY: I've been with my husband for 10 years. For a long time, I didn't decorate our house because I didn't want to spend the money. But for the last few years, I've spent many hours poring over Pinterest. I LOVE interior decorating and know exactly how I want each room of the house to look.

The problem is my husband. I once tried to buy a new shower curtain. It was a huge debacle because he didn't like the one I'd chosen. Abby, I have done my homework. How do I convince my husband to give me free rein in decorating? I'm afraid every paint color and every piece of furniture is going to be an argument, and I'm so discouraged I don't even try.

We've had the same curtains, bedding and dining room table for years, and our house is very ugly. Should I just start making changes without consulting him? Should I sit him down and talk to him? Is it fair of me to not take his preferences into account? -- FRUSTRATED CREATIVE

DEAR FRUSTRATED: By all means, discuss this with your husband before making any changes. Under no circumstances should you make any without consulting him. It would be extremely unfair to ignore his opinion. Some compromises will have to be made. The least contentious way to accomplish this would be with the help of a professional decorator who can take both your preferences into account and help you to blend them.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been married for 16 years, together for 22. He's the love of my life, my sunshine and roses. He's a great husband and an even better father.

You are probably wondering why on earth I'm writing to you. Well, his teeth are disgusting. They are stained, chipped and just gross. He is overcoming some self-esteem issues regarding his weight. He has lost a good bit, and I'm super proud of him, but how do I say, "Great job! But there's still something wrong with you"?

For the record, his weight means nothing to me. I never pushed him to be "slim" or "buff," but rather to be healthy and have enough stamina to keep up with our kids and get off the CPAP machine. Money and the dental expenses aren't an issue, but he would rather spend extra money doing fun things as a family, making memories and having adventures, which is great. I just wish he could have a nice smile while doing it. Advice? -- NOT QUITE PERFECT IN OHIO

DEAR NOT QUITE: Because your husband's teeth are a turn-off, you are going to have to address the problem. Wait until he is at or near his goal weight, then tell him that although you adore him, you would find him more kissable if he would deal with his dental issue. Tell him that putting it off may make the problem more difficult to fix. Your family dentist may be able to help or refer him to a good cosmetic dentist.

DEAR ABBY: I have had a falling out with my sister over her 13-year-old son, my nephew. He is generally a happy child, with everything a boy could want in moderation. My sister is separated from his father. She has primary custody, but they do have a co-parenting relationship.

My nephew respects and obeys his father, but he treats my sister like crap. He yells at her and his grandmother, constantly talks back, etc. When he tried it on me, I put him in his place with some choice words. My sister took offense, and we argued over it. I think he needs clear consequences for disrespecting adults. Instead, my sister makes excuses for why he behaves this way -- "He didn't sleep well last night. He's upset about X-Y-Z," etc.

I know I'm armchair parenting, but I cannot stand to see this child yell at my sister or elderly mother, and I will not tolerate that behavior toward me. We end up arguing every time I try to talk to her about it. I have stopped spending time with them because of it. Advice, please. -- OLD-SCHOOL AUNTIE

DEAR AUNTIE: Your nephew may act out because he is entering his turbulent teens, and this is a phase. It could also be that his mother has yet to make him suffer the consequences for his disrespectful behavior toward you and his grandmother.

Since your sister and her ex are co-parenting, they should both be talking to their son about "respect." His grandmother also has a tongue, and she shouldn't tolerate her grandson's bad behavior, either. Personally, I would handle it by avoiding the kid until he straightens up, which may take forever.

DEAR ABBY: A dear friend of 12 years recently lost her beloved dog (who she called her third child) to old age. She chose to put the dog down because of health problems and has been racked with guilt ever since.

I lost my 19-year-old son 10 years ago to suicide. This has been the worst decade of my life, and I grieve for him every day. My friend has been equating the death of her pet to the death of my son, which has caused a major rift in our relationship. It is not only insulting but also beyond hurtful to me to hear that the passing of a pet is as painful and tragic as the loss of my son.

I have told her time and time again there is no comparing the loss of a human child to the loss of a canine "child," yet she continues to disagree. How should I deal with her and this situation? Your advice would be greatly appreciated. -- GRIEVING MOM IN THE SOUTH

DEAR GRIEVING MOM: I will cut your friend some slack because she's in pain right now, but she's deluded. The pain of sending a beloved pet across the Rainbow Bridge and that of losing a child are not comparable, and for her to have said it -- not only once but to harp on it -- is ridiculous. The best way to deal with this woman would be to distance yourself until she regains some perspective.