DEAR MISS MANNERS: I had an unfortunate encounter in a parking lot. When I got out of my car, the lady in the car next to me also got out, walked around her car, and physically placed herself in front of me to prevent me from leaving the space between the cars.

She then demanded that I allow her to open my driver’s door to make sure that my car had not dinged hers when I opened it. The passenger side of her car was, to the naked eye, totally free from scratches; anyone could see that my door had not scratched hers. But she would not get out of my way without my compliance.

The doors could touch each other, it turned out, but again, no dings or scratches at point of contact. She literally shoved her nose right up next to the car to examine her paint job, and had to admit that it was not scratched.

I had business inside, and when I came out, she was waiting for me, apparently to lecture me about my parking habits and demand to know if I worked at the business that owned the lot.

I advised her that if she did not want anyone touching her car, ever, she should leave it in her garage. Then I got in my car and drove off.

I now wish I had shut her down earlier, when she first demanded that I prove something that she could see for herself had not happened, but I don’t know how I could have done it within the bounds of civility. Is there a way I could have extracted myself without giving in to her intimidation tactics, even as much as I did?

GENTLE READER: Creating an implicit threat of bodily harm by not letting you pass is surely a greater infraction than potential damage to one’s car.

Miss Manners suggests that you point that out, thus switching the blame. “If you would like to get the police involved to reinforce that the car has not been damaged, that is your right. But I am afraid that if you continue to harass me by not letting me by, I will certainly have to involve them.”

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I’ve been dating a man for several months. He picks his nose quite a lot, doesn’t use a tissue or wash his hands immediately. I’m grossed out, but don’t know how to bring it up. Once I pushed a tissue in his direction and he swatted it away -- a bit defensively.

I feel petty for breaking up with him over it. How do I bring it up in a way that doesn’t embarrass him?

GENTLE READER: Squirm. The next time he comes in for an embrace or to hold your hand, good-naturedly pull away saying, “I will be much more amenable once I know that finger is clean.” If there is otherwise true affection in this relationship, Miss Manners feels certain that he will mend his ways.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have two great-nieces, ages 6 and 3. Ever since I can remember, the 6-year-old has insisted on “helping” people open their gifts, to the point of opening the gift and giving it to the recipient.

Everyone thinks it is so cute. I do not; I think it’s ill-mannered. When I buy a gift for anyone, I want the person receiving it to open it and know it’s from me.

For the 3-year-old’s birthday, I bought her something I knew she would love. I prepared for the 6-year-old to zoom in on the opening of gifts, and, sure enough, she started to open my gift and the card. As gracefully as possible, I went over to the 6-year-old and said, “Please let her open her own gift and card.”

The children’s mother and grandmother insisted she was just trying to help, and tsk-tsked me as everyone looked on. The 3-year-old enjoyed her gift with such delight and was oblivious to any of the silliness that occurred. She happily continued “opening” her gifts after the 6-year-old had already opened them and passed them to her.

Later, the mother, my niece, called me aside and said the 6-year-old was crying and upset that I asked her not to open the gifts. (This was after she “helped open” all the other gifts.) I said, “When I give a gift to your girls, or anyone, I want them to enjoy opening them, respectively. If you want me to talk to the 6-year old, I will explain how I feel.” She said, “No, it’s OK.”

I think it’s wrong of my niece and her mother (my sister-in-law) to continue to promote such bad manners. I now hear that the 3-year-old is passing the same ill manners down to their 1-year-old cousin.

GENTLE READER: This is a problem that will soon solve itself, as the children get older, decide that they are tired of being outranked and start to fight back.

For now, however, Miss Manners recommends that you stay out of it, except when it comes to presents given to you. Then you may say, “Thank you, but I like to open gifts by myself, just as you do.“ If you want to expedite the process, you may add conspiratorially to the youngest victim, “Right, Millie? Isn’t it fun to open your own presents?”

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was over for dinner at the home of a delightful family whom I do not yet know well, and I would love to return the favor. However, I know that for a variety of reasons, they would not be able to eat anything cooked in my home. In a situation like this, what would Miss Manners do?

GENTLE READER: Invite them to an event that does not require food. A performance of something, for example, or a sporting event. And if there are refreshments available for purchase and your new friends partake, Miss Manners suggests you quickly take note of the ingredients or caterer.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I sometimes host cocktail hours at my home for people in my industry. The company that supplies the bartender prohibits a tip jar and adds a 21% service charge to their bill, of which the contract states 18% goes to the service staff.

This compensates the bartender at a living wage and then some. Still, some guests insist on sliding across dollar bills, which makes others reach into their wallets, too, which defeats part of my hospitality. Is there a way to tell people that staff in my home have already been fully tipped (a practice I find abhorrent anyway)?

GENTLE READER: Before the guests arrive, assemble the service staff, say how much you are looking forward to the party, thank them profusely -- and remind them that, as a demonstration of that gratitude, they will be receiving 18% of the bill as tips so that guests may enjoy themselves.

After the party starts, intercept the first tip and return the money to your guest, asking that they please not worry themselves: You have already ensured that everyone is being fairly compensated.

Miss Manners notes that this will go better if you have used your pregame meeting to identify the server least likely to grimace behind you when you return your guest’s money. As a party game, everyone could then go looking for the unexplained 3% that has been added to your bill.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Along in years, I have moved to a new city. I was glad to find a weekly bridge game at the local community center, and I looked forward to enjoying the game and meeting some new people.

I am a low-to-average bridge player, but nobody has made me leave because of my playing -- until this meeting. My partner was so critical that I was shocked.

What I was taught was that your first responsibility was to be sure your partner had a good time. I did not have a good time. I’m finding it hard to go back and try again. What good way could I have handled the situation?

GENTLE READER: There is a strategy that newcomers to multiplayer games can employ to head off such behavior. That is to ask the expected skill level before joining -- and firmly protest your own shortcomings before the game begins.

While this warns would-be partners what to expect, Miss Manners recognizes that it runs the risk of your coming under suspicion later if you turn out to be the best player in the room.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: At what age should a man say “no” if he is asked to be a groomsman by a 20-year-old?

GENTLE READER: Age can be used as a shield against many unpleasant tasks, but Miss Manners would have thought that being asked to be a groomsman is both flattering and enjoyable. As the bridegroom making the request is likely a friend or family member, any refusal is going to have to rely on something other than age -- more “I’m so sorry, that’s when my surgery is planned” and less “I don’t like morning dress.”

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)