Call it a premonition or a traumatic flashback, but Ryan Cusick knew he would have to leave his country on July 24, 2024 -- the day Donald Trump secured the Republican nomination for president.
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Cusick, 42, born and raised in Missouri, identifies as nonbinary and transmasculine. That day in July took him back to when he was a teenager. When Cusick was 14, he lived with his mother and an abusive stepfather. The stepfather eventually ended up in jail.
“When he got out, he walked back into our lives, and I had no say in it,” Cusick said. He left home at 17.
Last summer, he watched political attacks on the trans community ramp up. He feared Trump’s campaign promises to restrict trans rights even more.
“This felt so much like an abuser coming back,” Cusick said. “And I thought, ‘Never again will I sit back and let an abuser come back.’”
Still, it was an extremely painful decision to leave the U.S. He loved St. Louis and his life there. He had a remote job and a great apartment next to a park. He'd worked in medical records for a health care system for nearly a decade. He had found a supportive friend group and had been dating his partner for several years.
But he knew he could not feel safe under a Trump presidency. He worried that federal laws would override protections passed in any state.
So he set his sights on Mexico. In preparation for the move, Cusick used the site Numbeo.com to compare the cost of living, climate and public transit options in hundreds of cities in Mexico. He joined Facebook groups for expats and looked for a place where he could become part of the local community. He picked up daily lessons on Duolingo to supplement the Spanish he remembered from high school.
He wasn’t able to continue his job remotely from another country due to network security issues, so he saved a few paychecks and cashed out his remaining PTO. He hoped it would be enough to live on until he found another job.
He secured an Airbnb in the northern Mexican state of Durango to rent long-term. He packed a carry-on and a backpack.
Cusick boarded a plane to leave on Nov. 4 -- the day before the election. From Durango, he watched the returns come in with a growing sense of dread.
“It was like watching a car wreck that you know is going to happen,” he said.
The early actions of the administration have reaffirmed his decision to leave. On his first day back in the White House, Trump signed an executive order recognizing only two unchangeable sexes -- basically stating people like Cusick did not exist. About 1.6% of U.S. adults identify as transgender or nonbinary, according to a 2022 Pew Research Center survey. Information about transgender people has been removed from government websites. Requests for gender change markers on passports are now being denied. Transgender women are being moved into men’s prisons. Trump wants to remove transgender troops from the military.
“That kind of erasure will never be OK with me,” Cusick said.
He expects he can live frugally off his retirement savings for a couple of years, if needed, and he continues to look for remote work. While he’s befriended a neighbor and gotten to know local shop owners, starting a new life in a country where he knows no one is very difficult.
“At the end of the day, you are 1,500 miles from everyone you know and love,” he said. “It hits me every day.”
It hits hardest on the days when the president signs another anti-trans executive order: “I feel the loneliest when I can’t hug my friends and tell them they do exist, no matter what the government says.”
Mexico has granted him temporary residence to stay for four years. He hired an immigration facilitator to help with visa issues. He can work, access health care and eventually have his status made permanent, if he chooses.
He cried when he got his identification card. It represented safety.
“It was such an emotional day. It means a lot that Mexico is willing to be so open with their immigration practices,” Cusick said.
Still, he hopes that one day he can return home.