DEAR MISS MANNERS: My place of work has recently relocated into a different building, and the ladies' restroom is not a "single user" like we had at our previous location. There are two toilet stalls next to each other, which means that one can no longer do their business in assured privacy.

The other day, I walked into the restroom just as a gentlewoman colleague was furiously unleashing an unpleasant barrage of waste from her bowels. It was both noisy and aromatic.

I immediately turned around and left the restroom, returning a few minutes later, when I was sure this colleague had finished and departed the restroom.

But I fear if the tables were turned -- if I were the one to "explode" into the toilet -- that a colleague would not offer me the same privacy.

I've been to sporting events, concerts and airports that have a bank of 20 or more stalls in the ladies' room, and that does not bother me as much because those restrooms are noisy -- toilets flushing, women talking, faucets running, etc. And even when those restrooms are not so active and noisy, you can at least select a stall that's not directly next to an occupied one. You can distance yourself.

But in a two-stall restroom, this is not possible, so what is proper in this situation? I am tempted to ask a higher-up about putting some sort of lock on the inside (perhaps a simple hook and eye) so a user has an option to "do their business" in privacy.

GENTLE READER: Welp. There goes breakfast. And not, Miss Manners reluctantly assures you, by the same means as your unnecessarily graphic description.

Etiquette dictates that one works as hard as possible not to notice bodily functions -- especially when they are already being taken care of in the proper facilities. But sure, ask your supervisor for a lock. Just please spare them the vivid descriptions that you unduly leashed on Miss Manners and her hapless readers.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have a good friend who sent me a present for my birthday. The note with it said, "Here is a gift, I hope you like it! You may already have it, so I am sending the gift receipt!"

I thanked the friend in a text, and said I would wait to open it until my birthday. She replied, "I hope you don't have it already!"

When I opened it later, I did, in fact, have it already. I sent her a text, thanking her for the lovely present, and telling her it was perfect.

Her response, "Did you already have it?" I would have preferred not to answer, as I neither wanted to lie nor disappoint her. But her insistence forced me to choose. Which response would Miss Manners advise?

GENTLE READER: The response may be relayed politely, as in, "Yes, but I am excited to have two scalp massagers. I can put one in the bathroom and one in the living room."

Or, Miss Manners points out, "I can certainly use both" can refer to your using it in your regifting collection.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I had housecleaners come to assess my needs and quote the cost of services. I asked that they wear masks in my home to protect against the spread of disease.

When they arrived, one of them had a mask on. The other put one on, but without covering his nose. I reminded him by saying, "Sir, it looks like your mask slipped."

He covered his nose, but then made very rude and demeaning comments about me and my wife, using profane language, though muttering. I asked them to leave, which they did, with the man still cursing. How should I have handled this?

GENTLE READER: Your would-be housecleaner no doubt saw your request as impinging on his right to -- something.

He might, equally unconvincingly, have argued that the constitutional ban against government interference with free speech empowered him to swear at you. Miss Manners would not have you do other than as you did, trusting that the loss of your business will be a harsh, but in this case, fair, teacher.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My brother, who spent his life helping others, died suddenly two years ago. It was in the middle of the pandemic, and a memorial service was impossible.

Now, my other siblings and I have asked my sister-in-law whether we could plan a small family memorial service for him. I offered to do the planning and organizing, if it's too physically and emotionally draining for her, although I live 1,000 miles away. My siblings have offered, as well.

We always get an ambivalent response, and nothing happens. My brother and his wife never had children together, but he poured decades of time and untold amounts of money into caring for her children -- and then grandchildren.

All of our extended family have always had a very good relationship with my sister-in-law and cared about her very much. And we have tried to maintain that since my brother's death. But I cannot bear the thought that such a good and honorable man, who did so much for so many, could be allowed to pass without anybody even pausing for a few minutes to honor him.

I am considering just proceeding without her to organize a graveside memorial service for our family and my brother's closest friends, and simply telling her (or not) when we're holding it. But it will seem odd to my brother's friends that his widow is not the organizer. And I would expect that my doing so would be the end of our family's relationship with her and her grandson, whom my brother adored.

GENTLE READER: Funeral arrangements are not a time to be overly literal-minded about who did what. You are the sibling of the deceased, which gives you sufficient standing to plan a memorial.

Assuming the widow's reluctance is passive, and not actual opposition, you may be able to do the work, consulting her enough to avoid offense. Your description of your brother convinces Miss Manners it would be the right way to honor his memory.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I hosted overnight guests prior to us all leaving the next morning on a five-day trip. Prior to leaving, I emptied the kitchen trash can and put the bag in the large bin in my garage. I was very particular as to what I threw away so that my garbage can would not smell upon my return.

Unbeknownst to me, my guest put adult diapers in my garage trash bin. No bag ... they just threw them in!

Upon returning home, there was a horrible smell emitting from the can. My entire garage stunk! It took lots of scrubbing to get rid of the odor and mess.

While I would never say anything to my guest, I am wondering: What is the proper etiquette for disposal of such items? Should the homeowner be advised about this biohazard waste?

GENTLE READER: When disposing of more-than-usually unpleasant garbage, guests are required both to make some effort at containment before disposal and to consult with the host about further steps.

Miss Manners will not attempt to specify what items do or do not fall into this category, and, for similar reasons, recommends that the above-mentioned consultation not be made across the dinner table -- and not include props, no matter how illustrative.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Is it rude to correct other people's pronunciation, aside from someone's name?

My 14-year-old stepdaughter likes to correct others' pronunciations, including mine, to match her own white, Midwestern dialect. She also likes to mock pronunciations that are different than her own (again, including mine).

Most of her understanding of dialects is limited to television and the suburban Midwest, so her corrections show her own lack of experience. Often, both pronunciations of the word in question are in use somewhere.

But even if they were not -- if, for example, the person is wholly mispronouncing a word they learned reading -- to me, correcting the person is rude. This isn't "My Fair Lady," for Pete's sake. If you understand them, move on. Don't try to shame or bully; you have no clue why they say it how they do.

But her dad doesn't seem to think this is a problem, and sometimes joins in the "fun."

GENTLE READER: Such behavior is, as you know, rude.

Miss Manners recommends an approach that will carry weight with a teenage girl: Smile, as at a joke only you can hear. When asked about this, you can then explain that it's sweet that she does not know that this is the pronunciation used in Paris -- swapping "Paris" for any location your stepdaughter considers cosmopolitan.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I attended a formal outdoor military funeral, for which the widow hired a photographer. The photographer showed up in a faded T-shirt, ratty shorts and rubber flip-flops, looking as if she had just rolled out of bed.

I was shocked at her appearance, believing that it was disrespectful to the mourners and the occasion. Would it have been appropriate for me to have taken her aside to comment?

GENTLE READER: No -- but not because Miss Manners approves of flip-flops at funerals. Your rank lacked the authority to issue orders to the staff.

This is not a reason to take it up with the widow, who has other things on her mind. Better to lose a battle than the war, by which Miss Manners suggests that the disheveled appearance of one photographer is secondary to the occasion that brought the mourners together.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)