DEAR HARRIETTE: This upcoming election is important for minorities like myself. I remember when Trump was elected president how scary it was to me. On my college campus, some students were happy, celebrating in the streets, and students like myself were filled with fear for our country. Those who were celebrating were screaming and yelling in the faces of those who displayed any type of discomfort or were saddened by the news. For myself and my friends, it was a traumatizing event. Some of our clubs created support groups to discuss our feelings. With November ahead, that day is the only thing that plays in my mind. How can I stay hopeful for the coming election and put aside the memories? -- Young Voter

DEAR YOUNG VOTER: The beauty of the American democracy is that everybody is encouraged to have an opinion and to express it. The First Amendment allows all of us the freedom of speech. As you witnessed, there were opposing views about the Trump presidency when he was elected, and they continue to this day.

Our country is frighteningly polarized right now, with extreme views and voices on both sides. Your job as a young voter is to be fully informed about the issues. This requires you to do independent research. If you simply look at the news, you will glean information shared from a particular political perspective based on the news source you choose. You need to pay attention to a healthy cross section of voices. Dig deep to learn what the presidential candidates are saying about the issues, and ask questions when you are unsure.

You should also encourage your young friends to vote. You have power in your ability to vote. Make sure that as many people as possible execute that power.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m a single father with four girls. Their mother died about five years ago. Now my girls are teens and adults. One is off to college, and my oldest two are ready to move out. It will be me on my own with my youngest. I am so close with my girls, and I’m used to a full house. I really don’t want my oldest to leave yet, no matter how old they get, but I won’t say it to them. I know they are responsible, but I feel like they are rushing to leave because they want to. Why rush to be an adult and have bills when they can stay home with no worries? I just don’t want them to take the next step right away. I cannot figure out if I am trying to protect them or protect myself. Should I tell them how I feel? -- Attached Daddy

DEAR ATTACHED DADDY: Grieving does not have a time limit. I am so sorry that you continue to feel residual grief and also that you are facing an empty nest with such trepidation. This is not an easy transition for a parent. And yet it is part of life. Please do not put the burden of your emotional state on your girls. You have to go through your process just as they have to become independent. Instead, be supportive as you let them know that the family home will always be there for them.

You may want to get grief counseling to help you sort through your feelings and set yourself on a healthy course for this new stage in your life.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been going through my papers trying to get organized before the fall, and I noticed that one of my clients never paid me for a job I did last year. It has been several months, and I only just now realized it. With quarantine and all, I didn’t notice that this invoice had gone unpaid. Is it too late to remind him of the money I am owed? I know that this has been a difficult time for businesses, but it has been hard on me, too. I did submit the invoice back in February, but I forgot to follow up. What do you think? -- Overdue Invoice

DEAR OVERDUE INVOICE: By all means, contact this client and point out that you just realized that you never received payment on the outstanding invoice. Forward a copy of the original invoice and request payment. Be kind in your note. If you know the client personally, you may also want to pick up the phone and call. Check to see how he is doing. There is a chance that you may have to wait a little longer if this business is currently suffering. Your check-in should help you figure out what is realistic to expect.

Know that even if you need your money urgently, if the company is experiencing dire straits, you may not be able to collect it on the spot. Alternatively, some businesses did well during the quarantine period. You won’t know until you make contact. Pay attention. Listen carefully and proceed with as clear an understanding as you can to ascertain how soon they will be able to pay you.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I looked in the mirror the other day and had to gasp. This period of quarantine has been no friend to me. I have sat in my house for months, and I look like it. I don’t even know how I put on so much weight, but it is not good. I feel like I have turned into one of my aunties who I pledged as a child I would never become. I always judged them for getting so big, and here I am looking just like them. I am horrified. But I am worried that I am too old to shed the weight. What can I do to reverse these months of lethargy? -- Overweight

DEAR OVERWEIGHT: It would be great to start with a complete physical at the doctor. Find out how much you weigh and the status of your body. Learn if there are any health conditions for you to attend to, and ask your doctor about recommended exercises that are safe for your body now. Ask for a referral to a nutritionist as well. Between diet and exercise, you can work to improve your overall health and lose weight at the same time. The key will be for you to be committed to the plan. No matter what age, you can pivot and make a tremendous difference. You deserve to be healthy.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My mom and I do not get along. She was a single mom, and when I was growing up, she had a ton of rules and complained and yelled about things in the house not being a specific way. She kicked me out for multiple months at a time while I was in high school. I am now 23, and she has remarried. I do not get along with her husband either.

Five months ago, she told me she was selling our family home to get a one-bedroom apartment for her and her husband, and I needed to move out in two months. I have my own place now, and we have spoken regularly, but I have noticed that three months have passed since I left, and she has not put the house up for sale. I cannot help but think that she lied to me to get me out of the house once and for all. I feel betrayed and have not brought it up because I feel like she chose her husband over me. I know an argument like that would end any relationship I would care to have with her. Am I assuming the worst of her? -- Abandoned

DEAR ABANDONED: I am sorry that you and your mother have had such a combative relationship. It is obvious that it hurts your feelings deeply. Now that you are an adult, though, it is time for you to be independent. No one knows if your mother will actually move, but it is good that you did. By living in your own space, you are in charge of your destiny. You do not have to abide by your mother’s rules. You can create your own and begin to build self-esteem on your own terms.

Let go of your questions about whether or not your mother will move. Turn your attention to your own life, dreams and goals. Focus on yourself. Also, wish your mother well. If she is happy, she will likely be kinder to you. I hope that over time you can let go of the feeling of being abandoned. Consider yourself like a baby bird who was pushed out of the nest -- all so that you can fly!

DEAR HARRIETTE: My son returned from college last summer. He finished with a bachelor’s degree in education. We agreed that in 2020, he would begin applying for teaching jobs to start this fall. Now quarantine has passed, and school is starting next month. I have been waiting for news of his new teaching job. When I finally asked him what school he will work for, he told me he has decided to go down a different path -- but he is not sure what yet. I’m speechless. He has a degree he does not intend on using. We spent so many months in quarantine, and he still does not even know what this new path is. Why would he waste so much time? -- My Son’s Not a Teacher

DEAR MY SON’S NOT A TEACHER: I wish you had been talking to your son throughout the quarantine period. He probably needed to talk through his plans and reconsider his future. Education right now is tenuous at best, even for veteran teachers. It is not surprising that your son is skittish about taking a teaching job -- if there is even one available. Many schools have hiring freezes at this time.

Move past your disappointment and talk to him so you can support him as he looks for a new path. Millions of people have recently filed for unemployment. It may be very difficult to find work. He needs your support.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)