DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently got promoted at work, which I was really excited about until things got awkward with a close colleague of mine. Before the promotion, we were on the same level, working side by side for over two years. Now that I’m her supervisor, the dynamic has changed, and it’s been uncomfortable. She’s been distant ever since I got promoted. She doesn’t talk to me the same way, and when we do interact, there’s this underlying tension that didn’t exist before.

I’ve tried to keep things as normal as possible, but I can tell she’s hurt or maybe resentful. I can’t help but wonder if she expected to get the promotion herself, or if she feels betrayed that I didn’t warn her ahead of time. At the same time, I want to do well in this new role and not feel like I have to downplay my success. Is there a way to rebuild the trust and keep our friendship intact while also stepping into this leadership position, or is this just one of those situations where personal and professional lines should not be crossed? -- Moving Up

DEAR MOVING UP: Sometimes promotions provoke work friendship casualties. While this is not what you want, at the moment, your responsibility is to do your job. Dig in and learn everything you can. Stay laser-focused about the work. Check in regularly with your supervisor to track your progress. If you feel comfortable enough to speak frankly with your supervisor, ask for advice on navigating the changing dynamics of office friendships as you grow at the company.

What you are experiencing is common, even as it is painful. What you can do is continue to be respectful and friendly to this person, but you cannot change how she feels.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband curses all the time. As he ages, it has gotten worse. I used to be able to get him to curb his cursing when in the company of elders and children, but now he doesn’t care. I used to take him to office functions, like company dinners or business galas, but I hesitate now because he may begin cursing like a sailor at the most inappropriate moment. It’s almost as if he has lost a filter now that he is older. How can I get him to be aware of his behavior? If he refuses to tone it down, I fear I won’t be able to take him places anymore. -- No Cursing Allowed

DEAR NO CURSING ALLOWED: People who know your husband well already know that he has a foul mouth. While you don’t like it, it’s OK for him to be in their company as his behavior is expected.

When it comes to work functions, think twice. If you believe that your husband’s behavior will negatively impact your reputation, stop bringing him to those functions. When asked where he is, just say that he couldn’t make it. Make sure you are not overreacting. A lot of people curse -- a lot. Survey your landscape to do a gut check on this before you make your decision.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: Recently, I saw that one of my cousins came out on social media. She posted herself and a partner kissing, and a lot of her friends were commenting, congratulating them and admiring their courage.

My cousin is 11. Some of the photos are of her and her partner holding hands, some show kissing and some seem set at home or in their rooms. I don’t think kissing or cuddling is appropriate or necessary at that age, especially if parents aren’t aware. Part of me wants to share with her mom, but I don’t want to expose something that my younger cousin isn’t ready to share yet. Aside from the young age, there is the layer of her sexuality. We grew up in a religious family, and I’m not sure of her mom’s views in that regard. Would she be ready to accept this? I feel torn because I think her mom should have the chance to talk to her about her developing romantic feelings, but I don’t want to put my younger cousin in a vulnerable position. What would you do? -- Coming Out

DEAR COMING OUT: First, think about yourself at your cousin’s age. Many children have their first crushes at about the same time. Sexual attraction can start way before that as well. It is not unusual for 11-year-olds to be exploring their sexuality. The fact that your cousin put it on social media means that she is not trying to hide her identity.

Yet, as you point out, it may be difficult to discuss with her parents. Since you saw it, would you be willing to talk to her first? Let her know you saw her post and ask her to talk to you about her life. Get a sense of what’s going on. Also, tell her that she needs to talk to her mom. Let her know you feel that it’s your responsibility to show the post to her mom, but you wanted to talk to her first. At least in this way, she won’t be blindsided when her mom brings it to her attention.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m trying to find a balance between respecting boundaries and being vigilant. I believe a friend of mine is struggling with depression. This is someone I used to talk to every day and see at least once a week. I know that sounds excessive, but she was just very present. In the past two years, she has experienced a lot of loss, change and upheaval, and I can see that it’s taken a toll on her. We’ve talked about how it's affected her, and I thought those conversations were a sign of healing, but lately, she has shut everyone out. She has disappeared from social media, never answers phone calls and only seldomly responds to texts. When I ask if she’d be open to spending time together, even if just silently, she says she’d rather be alone. Her mom is worried, and so am I. How can I be there for a friend who doesn’t want to be around anyone? -- Isolation

DEAR ISOLATION: You can’t force your friend to talk to you. You can continue to let her know you love her and want to be there for her. Try to visit her. Call her regularly, even if you get voicemail. Stay in touch with her mother. Keep her in prayer.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My cousin decided to plan a family reunion this year. We have a large family spread throughout a few states and a few countries. My cousin refused to allow anyone else in the family to help her plan this grandiose reunion, despite several people asking. It was a huge undertaking, and in the end, there were a lot of missteps. Many people were offended because they didn’t even know it was happening, and the actual event was all over the place. I tried debriefing with her a few days later about what I thought could help the next time around, and she snapped on me. I explained that I, as well as others, would love to be a part of the planning so that she doesn’t have to be responsible for so many moving parts, and she accused me of being negative and judgmental. How can you reason with someone who is determined to be a solo act and is averse to criticism? -- Family Reunion

DEAR FAMILY REUNION: It may be too soon for your cousin to be able to hear the critique that you have to offer her. Wait a bit. Meanwhile, speak to a few of your family members who are interested in helping out next time. When you speak to your cousin again, talk about the future. Make it clear that the event needs a team effort, and those assembled want to be on the team. Thank your cousin for getting the ball rolling this year, but be firm that it is not OK for her to go solo again. There are too many details for one person to handle on her own.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My partner and I work in the same field: media production. Work has been scarce as of late; either there are limited positions or limited funding, and both affect all parties involved. For about a year, my partner struggled to get booked for a show, and I held us both up. Supporting the two of us financially was not easy, but it was a walk in the park compared to what my partner needed emotionally during that trying time. Fast forward, and the roles have reversed. I haven’t been booked for a show in a long time, and I ended up taking a job at a school just to secure income. I am miserable, and my partner doesn’t have the patience to deal with me. He says that his financial support should speak volumes. I do appreciate him; I just wish he could realize how sad I feel right now. If he would just slow down and hug me or listen to me, it would mean the world. I’ve told him this, but it seems like he’d rather avoid my feelings and the emotional conversations. I just feel alone. -- At a Loss

DEAR AT A LOSS: It seems that your partner does not have the emotional intelligence that you have. You are needing something from him that he cannot readily provide. That doesn’t mean you should stop telling him your needs. It does mean that you should figure out other ways to take care of yourself. Join a support group in your industry. Talk to a trusted friend about your situation when you need to unwind. Continue to tell your partner what you need from him -- one thing at a time.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions toaskharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)